Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Monday, October 16, 2006
Falsehood
FALSEHOOD, n. A truth to which the facts are loosely adjusted to an imperfect conformity.
2006 Update: A biased account of sincere spin or an unjust allegation by my enemy, who has a tail.
When I first started writing the stories of my life I was given a bit of priceless advice from a friend, "Never spoil a good story for the sake of the truth."
Falsehood - Ahhh the time my coworker told me about the secret farmer society to cover up meth inhalation deaths on dairy farms. Yep, thats a falsehood.
considerign that everything has three sides: my side, your side and the truth!
falsehood= both sides of the coin. My side and your side. In between there is also truth, but nobody can perceptively speak up for it, so it is usually silent and therefore has a tough point to make for itself. Poor truth, always gets the short end of the stick!
Ah, Minka, some can see both sides of the coin, but prefer to concentrate on the ridged rim inbetween. Those people need a falsehood, which is a full mask one pulls over one's head so as to show a face that will be acceptable to others.
Remember my trip to the reptile museum this summer? I learned about a snake, Malpolon moilensis, that is known as as 'false cobra'. It rears up and spreads its neck into a falsehood to imitate the cobra.
(I have an aversion to snakes but seemed to have absorbed everything I learned in about them that day! Don't tell Ariel though, she has a pet Brazilian rainbow boa. Oh, and don't tell Minka, she doesn't like hearing about snakes) :-)
about those dairy farms, CJ... you're talking about bovine flatulence, right? because everyone knows cow farts are destroying the ozone layer, even as we breathe.
Its Monday again, and though it may be afternoon, I am still without a suitable offering. There are lots of nice quotes I am sure, but none that spring to mind. Soooo, have yourself a lovely Monday afternoon.
falsehood - The head covering thrown around those who lie to protect them from their dastardly deeds. (See black hood, black cloak, and fire, liar, liar pants on)
The thing on the back of my red jacket which is supposed to cover my head in case of rain but which lacks the size and depth for a head as large as mine...
Falsehood: Somebody else's religion.
ReplyDeleteI'm second and that's no lie.
ReplyDeleteso, in your updated definition, falsehood = tail spin?
ReplyDeleteFalsehood: wishful thinking.
ReplyDeleteFACT, n. Proves me right. FACTION: they agree with me. FALSEHOOD: a fact in someone else's faction.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first started writing the stories of my life I was given a bit of priceless advice from a friend, "Never spoil a good story for the sake of the truth."
ReplyDeletefalsehood enhanced humor
Falsehood: A variation on Robin Hood. Someone that lies to the poor and gives to the rich.
ReplyDeleteLocale of liars. xoxo
ReplyDeleteFalsehoods? Pseudonyms of course!!
ReplyDeleteFor the undercover cops, jenna?
ReplyDelete:)
"A nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people."
ReplyDeleteJohn F. Kennedy
a, like someone else has religion.
ReplyDeleteJoel, it's twoo.
Brian, you never left. I saw the hatbox wiggle.
Nice, Puppybrose. You make a good editor and resource on falsehood.
O Ceallaigh, that's about right. I mean, wrong.
Amen, Quilldancer.
Indie, nice finding the hood. ¿Como va todos en España?
Two hood puns. Xoxo, Mireille.
Anome, by "mendacious friend" you mean one who takes notes but not pictures?
I'm with you, Little Blue Pill.
Joel, you know, the truth of that statement is moving, the idea of a President who can use that sentence structure is just depressing.
Falsehood: The age between tenth and eleventh grades. (off to the dentist...ugh)
ReplyDeleteFalsehood: see also The Cult Of Personality which seems to be growing this election year
ReplyDeleteYou bet, OC! So...shhh.
ReplyDeleteFalsehood - Ahhh the time my coworker told me about the secret farmer society to cover up meth inhalation deaths on dairy farms. Yep, thats a falsehood.
ReplyDeletewithout falsehood where would we be?
ReplyDeletehurray, Indie! that was beautiful.
oh, so much to choose from.
ReplyDeleteTime Warner Cable told falsehood after falsehood this past week. As if they really did have people working round the clock. Sure
So I couldn't attend my own roast, for most of it, and challenge some falsehoods :-)
Falsehood: Southern charm and Northern hospitality.
ReplyDeleteFalsehood: Half of what you see and none of what you hear.
ReplyDeletecj: I remember reading an article about meth factories on dairy farms a few years back (at least) in Rolling Stone. It was horrific.
ReplyDeleteFalsehood/Lie:
ReplyDeleteOne of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.
- Pudd'nhead Wilson
Doug, an edit of your update: ... an unjust allegation by my enemy, who has a tale.
ReplyDeleteconsiderign that everything has three sides: my side, your side and the truth!
ReplyDeletefalsehood= both sides of the coin. My side and your side. In between there is also truth, but nobody can perceptively speak up for it, so it is usually silent and therefore has a tough point to make for itself. Poor truth, always gets the short end of the stick!
Minka - or the flip side of the coin?
ReplyDeleteAh, Minka, some can see both sides of the coin, but prefer to concentrate on the ridged rim inbetween. Those people need a falsehood, which is a full mask one pulls over one's head so as to show a face that will be acceptable to others.
ReplyDeleteFalsehood. What got my coworker fired. Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha. I'm very sad to see her go. ~wipes stray tear~
ReplyDeleteRemember my trip to the reptile museum this summer? I learned about a snake, Malpolon moilensis, that is known as as 'false cobra'. It rears up and spreads its neck into a falsehood to imitate the cobra.
ReplyDelete(I have an aversion to snakes but seemed to have absorbed everything I learned in about them that day! Don't tell Ariel though, she has a pet Brazilian rainbow boa. Oh, and don't tell Minka, she doesn't like hearing about snakes)
:-)
Falsehood: When a bend in the truth takes a back flip.
ReplyDeleteNow...back to that action novel I am writing...
One more:
ReplyDeleteFalsehood: an uptown version of a lie.
Falsehood: A baldface lie with a combover. The polite and civil way of accusing someone of speaking like a politician.
ReplyDeleteoooh... good one, Mushroom!
ReplyDeleteabout those dairy farms, CJ... you're talking about bovine flatulence, right? because everyone knows cow farts are destroying the ozone layer, even as we breathe.
Falsehood: slip of the forked-tongue
should that have been:
ReplyDeleteFalsehood: *flip* of the tongue?
(first i was playing off Kyahgirl's snake reference, but in my head, Minka's coin-flippiness works, too)
fine. i'm done here.
puppy, I got it :-)
ReplyDeleteFalsehood? It's all been done (before) (every minute)
ReplyDeletefalsehood sham tam
ReplyDeleteIts Monday again, and though it may be afternoon, I am still without a suitable offering.
ReplyDeleteThere are lots of nice quotes I am sure, but none that spring to mind.
Soooo, have yourself a lovely Monday afternoon.
*falsehood* this is easy...
ReplyDeleteEVERYTHING OUTA bushies MOUTH!!!!
Uhmmm ... Elvis is alive?
ReplyDeleteWait! Quilldancer, are you sayin' that Elvis isn't alive????? Say it isn't so!
ReplyDeletefalsehood - The head covering thrown around those who lie to protect them from their dastardly deeds. (See black hood, black cloak, and fire, liar, liar pants on)
ReplyDeleteThe thing on the back of my red jacket which is supposed to cover my head in case of rain but which lacks the size and depth for a head as large as mine...
ReplyDeleteMule, you're up over my head today.
ReplyDeleteV.I. I can't tell if it's growing just that it's awfully big.
Thank you, CJ. Finally something dark. I was starting to think you were Al Queda.
Probably bored witless, Ariel.
Pia, a roast is fine time for falsehoods. Hope the cable comes back before Boston Legal comes on.
Jake, been in D.C. recently?
From the apple tree to the grapevine, G. Your life is a many-fruited thing,
Terry, that's a great quote from Mr. Clemens.
One of each, Quilly.
Minka, every once in a while the coin lands on it's edge. It's true.
Cindra Jo, he'll never confess even under torture. He seems like a smart fellow.
Or a tail, TLP.
Yours, Jenna?
Kyah, a dishonest serpent? Is nothing sacred?
Riiight, Mutha. I wish you no more interruptions. I like the second definition.
Mushroom, that was funny. I bet that's the first combover reference I've seen in this space.
Puppybrose, you want us to think the flip was a slip. I'm onto you.
Not by me, Actonbell. Never by me.
Funny, Quill.
I hope yours was perfect, Logo.
Karen, how do you always know when to come here?
a4g, those are both perfect.
Quillie, only on English Muffins and acid burns.
TLP, we were trying to keep it from you, you being southern and all. And you being from Alabama and all, we thought our chances pretty fair.
So, Poobah, the layer beneath the wires?
Cooper, I was waiting for that one. The problem is likely to get worse.
Haha Doug, haha. G'night.
ReplyDeleteFalsehood: detour
ReplyDeletefeel better, G (G'night? Good one.) : P
jeez, you Americans believe everything you hear in the news. here in Europe we know that Elvis lived, lives and will live forever.
ReplyDeleteFalsehood: Anything which doesn't fit my vision of reality.
ReplyDeleteG'morning G.
ReplyDeletePuppybrose, how about a detour through the shortest path.
Mistress Anna, I would never want to out-cynic you but some of the lower-level ones are scoundrels too, Madame Mayor.
Ariel, TLP lives in the Northeast so she's european like you and Jenna.
Cheesemeister, you're an undead bat-woman. What doesn't fit your definition of reality?
Good point Doug.
ReplyDeleteSo fool and fanatic are now synonymous?
ReplyDelete