Thursday, December 21, 2006

Domestic

DOMESTIC, n. A person whom one employs about the house to exercise the functions of master or mistress.
adj. Appertaining to the household, as a domestic husband, who loafs aboute the house making love to the female domestics. The domestic husband is commonly what Artemus Ward said the Prince of Wales was-"A good prpvider." That is to say, he commonly provides good looking kitchen maids.

2006 Update: adj. Locally labeled.

41 comments:

  1. Domestic Goddess....need I say more...except...I resemble that title.

    First

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  2. Anonymous5:02 AM

    Domestic: Home Grown perverts, ie. professional ball players.

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  3. *smile* Finally another Icelander is first....Minka...Thad er alt i laegi?....trans: It's Ok?

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  4. DOMESTIC, adj. Home grown. DOMESTICATED: Grown up, tamed - therefore boring and ripe to be taken advantage of. See UNDER MY THUMB, Mick. (Does not apply to southwestern pre-twentieth-century pens.)

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  5. Anonymous5:50 AM

    Domestic: Just smart enough to know not to bite a had with food in it.

    Love your "global economy" update, Doug.

    And Mo'a -- go get 'er!

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  6. Domestic: The neglected policy and partner of the current administration.

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  7. domestic let's just say it isn't an accident that the word starts with "do me".

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  8. Anonymous6:04 AM

    Domestic: A negative qualifier for cars, wine, chocolate, and cheese.

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  9. Domestic... a delusion the dear Loverboy once held on to that is no more courtesty of a non-and-never-to-be tamed nor domesticated bohemian other half.

    Domestic... a cosmic joke I tell you!

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  10. Oh... and to follow Quilldancer's lead (she started it mind you!!!!)...

    ... ahem...

    ... with a "stic"...

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  11. Anonymous6:15 AM

    Domestic: settled and/or saddled

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  12. Anonymous6:23 AM

    Domestic: what you dab on a bald head to attach a toupee.

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  13. domestic: indigenous to the home, but not to be confused with
    domesticated: reduced to the level of ordinary

    OC -- 22 + 1 chuckle and 4 words

    MzB -- I take no responsibility for the acts of my followers.

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  14. Mo'a, right down to the outdoor furniture.

    Brian, I prefer "differently moral" to "pervert."

    Mo'a, thanks for translating.

    Or those with housestaff, OC.

    Al, stir up all the trouble you want. I wear gloves.

    Sar, good to have you back brawlin'

    Ms. Quilly!

    Joel, I had the pleasure earlier in the month at a dinner party I joined with my little brother of hearing a french woman scold her husband for passing her the French wine instead of the good stuff from California. If I'd been smart enough not to point it out, I could have missed the gallic lecture on cheese. I'll remember that if I go back.

    Hermana, what was he thinking? Knows better now, doesn't he?

    Nice, puppybrose.

    Dome-stick. I'll write that down, Joe. I think I'm three years away.

    Quill, thanks for keeping us up to date on the math and the law.

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  15. Doug -- angelic me wants to know why you have set my name with that started exclamation point.

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  16. Anonymous8:21 AM

    Gasp! And I get in trouble for just being? Douglas!

    Differently moral...ahahahaha....

    wait...what was the word again? The "pervert" and "do me" references have me confused.

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  17. Anonymous8:30 AM

    French housemaids make good prpviders too

    prpvider: a tool used by a viking dentist to open your mouth

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  18. A friend gave a small poster which said my only domestic trait was that I live in a house. I think she was trying to warn my then fiance. He didn't listen.
    But he seems ok with that, probably has something to do with Quilly's definition (snicker snicker).

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  19. Anonymous9:52 AM

    A large pole used to render one sensible via a sharp whack to the head ( orig. dome-stick). The wetware version of rebooting a computer.

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  20. Anonymous10:04 AM

    What the Bear I live with ISN'T. :-D

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  21. Anonymous10:19 AM

    lvjkow-- Lively cow. That's the difference between a domestic gallon of milk or dog food. See Mad Cow. :)

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  22. Anonymous10:40 AM

    "She's quite domestic!" - a nice way of saying someone has a lot of time on their hands.

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  23. Anonymous11:00 AM

    exercising your mistress!?! kEwL!! :~)

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  24. Anonymous11:07 AM

    Together Scissors and I make up quite the domestic. He cooks and I clean and nobody's complaining...too much.

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  25. Quilly, angelic you should ask impish you that question.

    Jenna, you should try following a plot with those lips staring back at you.

    Karma, you can tell by the lace.

    Logo, that's what makes a house a home.

    CA, works for me every time. Happy holidays to you and Mrs. CA.

    Even in winter, Terry?

    Brian, I enjoy both. All three.

    Merry Christmas, CJ! It's also a sure sign that someone has criminal ambitions.

    You know, Karen. Talking walks and stuff.

    Sounds like a home that works, G. And Tali can do the calculus.

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  26. Doug, impish me claims bewilderment. Angelic me is concerned about her Sunday School teacher reputation.

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  27. Anonymous11:58 AM

    Precisely.

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  28. Anonymous12:35 PM

    Sigh.

    I get grief for my nekkid couple

    I get grief for my sparkly lips.

    Just for that I'm not defining domestic.

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  29. Anonymous1:56 PM

    msbrd:Ms Bored was very domestic, up until the point was made to the bum formally known as husband.

    Now she looks good in stripes. :)

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  30. domestic:

    follow my thoughts...

    violence
    animals
    majestic
    big
    stick

    I mean, imagine what it is like to be inside my head. Does this make sense? I think not! I need help...

    oh and I also blame Quilly and Miz B for this stream of conciousness!

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  31. Domestic: It can refer to a Goddess. See Roseanne Barr. Or to a terrible product. See Gross National P.

    But who could top Quilly's "Do me" comment? Certainly not I.

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  32. Quill, imps usually claim bewilderment. I wasn't born this morning.

    G, as I thought.

    Ha, Jenna. You can define "pert" again.

    Brian, I guess boredom is the warden's recruiter.

    Minka, I actually did follow you. I'm not sure which of us should be frightened. I commend your self-restraint at the end, though. Could that be the first free association here?

    TLP, that was GDP, right?

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  33. Doug -- can't blame an imp for trying ...

    TLP -- a Compliment from you is truly an honor.

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  34. self restraint is my middle name! Well, only because the world is so unobliging :)
    It is really late, I should not comment when it is late.

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  35. Anonymous6:18 PM

    Pert? A shampoo to get rid of dandruff. Do you have dandruff, Doug?

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  36. Anonymous6:28 PM

    domestic-betty flippin' crocker

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  37. Anonymous6:30 PM

    arsenic and old lace! didn't get the typo you maid ... err .. made?

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  38. uh yeah cindra...and that Martha Steward woman too.

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  39. Quilly, I never cast the first stone.

    Minka, I bet "self-restraint" sounds pretty in German.

    Jenna, that's the least of my flakinesses.

    Cindra, the Quill family sure is getting raw-mouthed.

    Karma, I don't see it. Maybe it's the arsenic I've been taking for my memory.

    A pox on them all, hey, Minka and Cindra?

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  40. Happy Holidays Doug. Enjoy!

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  41. Anonymous12:33 AM

    The Cheesemeister: The Undomesticated Domestic.
    With added function of Bathroom Assist for the Elderly as needed.

    Bah humbug...I mean, Happy Holidays!

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