Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Adherent
ADHERENT. n. A follower who has not yet obtained all that he expects to get.
i keep mulling over various "definitions" of this word but nothing seems to stick. apparently an ADD brain renders one incapable of adherent thought. sigh.
"Then Jesus took his disciples up the mountain and, gathering them around him, he taught them, saying:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven Blessed are the meek Blessed are they that mourn Blessed are the merciful Blessed are they that thirst for justice when persecuted Blessed are you when you suffer Be glad and rejoice for your reward is great in heaven
Then Simon Peter said, "Is this going to be on the test?" And Andrew said, "Do we have to write this down?" And James said, "How many points is this worth?" And Phillip said, "Can I borrow a pencil?" Bartholomew said. "What came after poor?" And John said, "The other disciples didn't have to learn this!" Mark said, "I left my notebook at home." And Matthew went to the bathroom.
One of the Pharisees who was present asked to see Jesus' lesson plan and enquired of Jesus, "Where are your anticipatory set and your objectives in the cognitive domain?"
And Jesus wept."
Guess it isn´t that easy being glued to!
Also: Did you know that "Jesus wept" is the shortest grammatcially correct sentence in the Bible?
oh. maybe that's why i didn't say it in the first place. heh heh.
in my head (where everything i say is funny all the time) i was thinking adherent almost sounded like "adding hair"... and, since adherent also means sticking to something, well... you can see where i took this downhill from there, and wound up with "wig glue".
thank you for pointing out how UN-freaking-funny that was. nothing like embarrassing one of your adherents in front of the others to keep the whole group in line. d'oh!
I wish you were an adherent to a certain posting time! When you're late, you mess up my morning routine! Of course, in a couple of days school will be out and it won't matter ....
Adherent: Sticks best by sucking up.
ReplyDeleteAl - I see you're clearly not an adherent of Teh Penquin as you boldy, albeit cleverly, took the first comment.
ReplyDeleteBierce's definition can't be bested, I'm not going to try. I am an adherent to the "don't mess with perfection" theory.
ReplyDeleteadherent - A sticky substance that binds a person to a decision or position that has been devalued.
ReplyDeletei keep mulling over various "definitions" of this word but nothing seems to stick. apparently an ADD brain renders one incapable of adherent thought. sigh.
ReplyDeleteadherent, clingy glue
ReplyDelete"I am rubber, you are glue. Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you."?
I am THAT mature!
ReplyDeletejust happy to be here....haven't yet obtained all that I expect to get from WA so must keep coming back.
ReplyDeleteI guess that makes me an adherent but not too sticky.
Minka: that's as bad as the comment i almost left, earlier...
ReplyDeleteAdherent: wig glue?
whew... thank goodness i didn't say it -- not sure i should be adherent to such immature behavior! ; )
A joke I heard while doing my teaching degree:
ReplyDelete"Then Jesus took his disciples up the mountain and, gathering them around him, he taught them, saying:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven
Blessed are the meek
Blessed are they that mourn
Blessed are the merciful
Blessed are they that thirst for justice when persecuted
Blessed are you when you suffer
Be glad and rejoice for your reward is great in heaven
Then Simon Peter said, "Is this going to be on the test?"
And Andrew said, "Do we have to write this down?"
And James said, "How many points is this worth?"
And Phillip said, "Can I borrow a pencil?"
Bartholomew said. "What came after poor?"
And John said, "The other disciples didn't have to learn this!"
Mark said, "I left my notebook at home."
And Matthew went to the bathroom.
One of the Pharisees who was present asked to see Jesus' lesson plan and enquired of Jesus, "Where are your anticipatory set and your objectives in the cognitive domain?"
And Jesus wept."
Guess it isn´t that easy being glued to!
Also: Did you know that "Jesus wept" is the shortest grammatcially correct sentence in the Bible?
We learn every day...
proceed!
Al, the vacuum of discipleship?
ReplyDeleteSar, those who have faith no greater than a mustard seed fear not the bitter.
Quilly, but you don't mind using it in a sentence I see.
Right, Poobah. The value of a dogma falls for every idiot that follows it.
Nothing seems to stick, Neva? I get it.
Minka, I was just going to say that your time with your nephews is well spent.
Kyah, you got loose nicely. Nice to see you back, pal.
Neva, that time I didn't get it.
Minka, is madness in the cognitive domain?
adherent: a quick fix to a shallow cut.
ReplyDeleteoh. maybe that's why i didn't say it in the first place. heh heh.
ReplyDeletein my head (where everything i say is funny all the time) i was thinking adherent almost sounded like "adding hair"... and, since adherent also means sticking to something, well... you can see where i took this downhill from there, and wound up with "wig glue".
thank you for pointing out how UN-freaking-funny that was. nothing like embarrassing one of your adherents in front of the others to keep the whole group in line. d'oh!
*shuffles off to corner, sits down on pity pot*
Puppy: I was thinking along the same lines -
ReplyDeleteAdherent: Name brand hair tonic.
adherent,n. sidekick...also see: desciple
ReplyDeleteAdherents: Diehard followers vowing their undying support (with their fingers crossed behind their backs). :-)
ReplyDeleteFor Puppy & Nessa:
ReplyDeleteadherent aka Rogaine
Right, Mule. Deep wounds take disciples.
ReplyDeleteSnups, sometimes your webmaster is a little bit high-friction. Don't mind him.
Interesting, Nessa. So the same word can apply to the customer and the product. It's Hair Club for Men is what is.
Actonbell, a good cat is a bad adherent. I know the currency she tithes in.
Minka, like Ferdinand?
Thanks, Actonbell. It kind of has a John Denver ring to it, doesn't it? I can almost feel the warble.
And speaking of famous JD's, you can trust me, Jamie Dawn. I'm as loyal as a box kite.
Quilly, what are you trying to say? I'm still in Nioxin territory. Well, that and spray paint.
sticking with the one that feeds us
ReplyDeleteI wish you were an adherent to a certain posting time! When you're late, you mess up my morning routine! Of course, in a couple of days school will be out and it won't matter ....
ReplyDeleteIcy, a dog is as close to St. Peter as you can get without crucifying upside down.
ReplyDeleteSorry, Quill. When I set Wednesday as my creative writing day, it didn't occur to me I'd need to be creative. Still struggling.