Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Kill
KILL, v.t. To create a vacancy without nominating a successor.
2007 Update: To provide a satisfying answer to the question "why?"
and i'm laughing at M'oa and TLP, even as i'm reminded of Kill Devil Hills, NC, which is near the spot where the Wright Brothers made their famous flight. ; )
oh, and by "vacation" i meant VACATE-tion. (get it?) just wanted to be clear about that. in my head, this was almost funny... after writing it out, however, i had the feeling my little play on words wouldn't kill the way i originally thought it would. (i hate when that happens) d'oh! ; )
we all, at some point, have been told: "That which does not kill you makes you stronger!". Sure, but let's also remember that that which DOES kill us, leaves us dead!
Just FYI!
It is one thing to disobey instructions, but I feel that hints like "Don't jump into this huge pit with all the spikes, snakes and tarantulas in it" have a purpose!
Cheers to another day of side- stepping land mines!
Sar: heh... and speaking of music, pretty sure Roberta Flack went about "Killing Me Softly" back in the 70's. (it was part of the soundtrack for Eastwood's thriller "Play Misty for Me" -- a film which killed, softly and/or otherwise.) ; )
That what does kill you leaves you dead--brilliant Minka in its utter simplicity and truth
"Kill" is a word often used by New Yorkers to express anger or discontent with another or oneself as in screaming about somebody two desks away "I'm going to kill that motherf--ker." Two seconds later "No lets try a new restaurant today."
This leaves people from other parts of the country very confused
Kill: no definition, but this makes me think of the German word "tot loben" - to praise something to death. The Bavarian kabarettist Bruno Jonas is a master of the genre, and to me it's the most sublime German humor I've found.
Paraphrased and translated from memory: All these people coming to Germany seeking asylum. They should stay in their countries and strengthen the resistance. Like if everyone had left under Hitler there would have been no resistance at all in Germany.
KILL, n. A convenient place to drop the body. (I'm astounded that you New Yawkers missed that.)
Once upon a time in Seattle, an unknown person, probably a proto-Goth, inscribed on a bathroom wall, in what he doubtless styled a fantastical script:
DIE
A sadist happened upon this inscription, and, unhappy with the absence of the inference of slow torture from its message, promptly added a T to the end of the word.
Along came a grammarian, who clearly preferred expressions in active instead of passive voice, and transitive instead of intransitive verbs. He scratched a proofreader's delete mark through the original writing, and substituted:
The commandments say "thou shalt not kill' Men make laws and prisons do fill We will put you away You can hear them say But I ask, what about those guys on the Hill?
Pia...Iceland imitates America insanely much. WE say "I am gonna kill you and can you tell your sister I fancy her" almost in the same sentence. Maybe Reykjavik will become New York's long lost twin?!
OC, I like his definition of Dawn. Thanks for bringing it to my attention!
Amoeba, Woody Allen might have written it already.
Anon, please have care what you say For it all might come true one fine day And congressional plot, More often than not, Fails when senators block their own way.
Excuse me, penguin but are you that definition just came to your attention? Or could it be a faded rose of days gone by?
kill - To hunt down that which is troublesome and choke it until a smile passes over one's face...
ReplyDeleteSorry, I got a little carried away there.
kill,v. to empty boots
ReplyDeleteHaving lived in up state NY..I am happy to note, that kill also means creek...were you wading Minka?
ReplyDeleteLOL Mo'a. When I first came across Fishkill NY, I thought that there must have been a huge die off of fish there! I'm not my mother's smartest girl.
ReplyDeleteI beg to differ with you Doug. Curiosity killed the cat. Satisfaction brought it back.
Kill: vacation?
ReplyDeleteand i'm laughing at M'oa and TLP, even as i'm reminded of Kill Devil Hills, NC, which is near the spot where the Wright Brothers made their famous flight. ; )
oh, and by "vacation" i meant VACATE-tion. (get it?) just wanted to be clear about that. in my head, this was almost funny... after writing it out, however, i had the feeling my little play on words wouldn't kill the way i originally thought it would. (i hate when that happens) d'oh! ; )
ReplyDeleteKill: My solution for a peaceful day.
ReplyDeletewe all, at some point, have been told: "That which does not kill you makes you stronger!". Sure, but let's also remember that that which DOES kill us, leaves us dead!
ReplyDeleteJust FYI!
It is one thing to disobey instructions, but I feel that hints like "Don't jump into this huge pit with all the spikes, snakes and tarantulas in it" have a purpose!
Cheers to another day of side- stepping land mines!
Duran Duran provided a view to it in the '80s.
ReplyDeleteSar: heh... and speaking of music, pretty sure Roberta Flack went about "Killing Me Softly" back in the 70's. (it was part of the soundtrack for Eastwood's thriller "Play Misty for Me" -- a film which killed, softly and/or otherwise.) ; )
ReplyDeleteMorgan, we all are.
ReplyDeletePoobah, you bore glad tidings. No harm in that.
Minks, the instructions are on the heel.
Mo'a that provides some insight.
TLP, nine satisfactions is good for anyone but a dog.
Neva, apropos of nothing I once had a roommate from there.
Nessa, that's my Rx.
Minka, now you tell me.
Sar, and a motive.
Neva, Roberta Flack was amazing. Even as a child I could tell.
KILL v.t.
ReplyDeleteK knife
I in
L left
L lung
That what does kill you leaves you dead--brilliant Minka in its utter simplicity and truth
ReplyDelete"Kill" is a word often used by New Yorkers to express anger or discontent with another or oneself as in screaming about somebody two desks away "I'm going to kill that motherf--ker." Two seconds later "No lets try a new restaurant today."
This leaves people from other parts of the country very confused
Kill: The newest cabinet position in charge of morals.
ReplyDeleteKooks
Invade
Lower
Lascivious
*afvew* affordable views
Your update is brilliant. I need to know why. Unfortunately it doesn't work for all situations.
ReplyDelete"Kill the wabbit"....
When you've killed the rabbit, your are preggers.
kill, does favour.
ReplyDeleteNeva, great song, great woman.
Kill: no definition, but this makes me think of the German word "tot loben" - to praise something to death. The Bavarian kabarettist Bruno Jonas is a master of the genre, and to me it's the most sublime German humor I've found.
ReplyDeleteParaphrased and translated from memory: All these people coming to Germany seeking asylum. They should stay in their countries and strengthen the resistance. Like if everyone had left under Hitler there would have been no resistance at all in Germany.
Your response comment from yesterday is killing me!
ReplyDeleteVery funny.
Kill Bill - I like those movies. I am demented.
Have a good day.
Don't kill anyone at the office... or anywhere else.
is kilt the past tense of kill?
ReplyDelete(ie., "today i kill, yesterday, i kilt?")
KILL, n. A convenient place to drop the body. (I'm astounded that you New Yawkers missed that.)
ReplyDeleteOnce upon a time in Seattle, an unknown person, probably a proto-Goth, inscribed on a bathroom wall, in what he doubtless styled a fantastical script:
DIE
A sadist happened upon this inscription, and, unhappy with the absence of the inference of slow torture from its message, promptly added a T to the end of the word.
Along came a grammarian, who clearly preferred expressions in active instead of passive voice, and transitive instead of intransitive verbs. He scratched a proofreader's delete mark through the original writing, and substituted:
KILL!!
Amoeba, that's under Mr. B.'s purview. I shy away from any such knowledge.
ReplyDeleteWhat doesn't kill you
makes you stronger
who said he wanted
to live any longer?
Just having some fun - in a dark way, but fun.
Quilly, the problem with stabbing people in a lung is you really need to do both sides. Or so I've heard.
ReplyDeletePia, it doesn't take a lot to confuse midwesterners.
Actonbell, how much or how many?
Brian, I want to be Secretary of that.
Terry, because you find inkblots beautiful.
Ariel, I appreciate how you make me look smiley.
That's funny, Indie. He's right, there's no telling what might have happened.
Jamie Dawn, you're a shiny kind of demented.
JJ, kill is the future tense of "bear."
Amoeba, you forgot to look at the Jersey girl. As long as the three found common ground, all was well and correct.
Mutha, they'll never take me alive.
G, that was nice.
She asked me once
To do a favor
It's wrong to kill
So I'll enslave her.
Amoeba: I think it is too shallow.
ReplyDeleteMo'a! Are you telling me there's not even one B-movie thriller out there in which the New York Boss tells the hit man:
ReplyDelete"Kill. And the kill's in the kill."
That would be a loss to literature. Especially if the scene were shot in the Catskills.
Y'know, Minka, old Bierce himself had something to say about "leaves us dead" business. See his definition of DAWN
The commandments say "thou shalt not kill'
ReplyDeleteMen make laws and prisons do fill
We will put you away
You can hear them say
But I ask, what about those guys on the Hill?
Pia...Iceland imitates America insanely much. WE say "I am gonna kill you and can you tell your sister I fancy her" almost in the same sentence. Maybe Reykjavik will become New York's long lost twin?!
ReplyDeleteOC, I like his definition of Dawn. Thanks for bringing it to my attention!
Mo'a, that's why God gave us shovels.
ReplyDeleteAmoeba, Woody Allen might have written it already.
Anon, please have care what you say
For it all might come true one fine day
And congressional plot,
More often than not,
Fails when senators block their own way.
Excuse me, penguin but are you that definition just came to your attention? Or could it be a faded rose of days gone by?
To kill: to squash the spider.
ReplyDeleteJenna, OC will not allow me to kill the spiders. They must be taken gently outside -- then squashed when he isn't looking.
ReplyDeleteBravo!
ReplyDeleteYou say kill I think Bikini.
ReplyDeletehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bikini_Kill
Jenna, eight legs=four men?
ReplyDeleteActonbell, that was a weird, fun book, wasn't it? The scene where three bicycles gears are discovered stolen still stands out.
Quilly, I'm glad he made a lady of you.
Brava, g!
I do my word association differently, Cooper. You say bikini I think a-test.
Doug, that's right...I defined taht word on your page before...see how I have grown :)
ReplyDeleteYou don't? You need glasses!