LEVIATHAN, n. An enormous aquatic animal mentioned by Job. Some suppose it to have been the whale, but that distinguished ichthyologer, Dr. Jordan, of Stanford University, maintains with considerable heat that it was a species of gigantic Tadpole (Thaddeus Polandensis) or Polliwig — Maria pseudo-hirsuta. For an exhaustive description and history of the Tadpole consult the famous monograph of Jane Potter, Thaddeus of Warsaw.
2007 Update: The monster in whose belly the prophet Jonah agreed to a time-share in Ninevah.
2007 Update: The monster in whose belly the prophet Jonah agreed to a time-share in Ninevah.
ah the prophet that was swallowed by a leviathan and spat by a whale.
ReplyDeleteNathan in a pair of jeans?
ReplyDeleteI got nothing!
Leviathan: Weighing in at four tons and sucking up three gallons of gas to the mile, this particular model was your father's Oldsmobile.
ReplyDeleteLeviathan: the act of flying, or levitating, out of the mouth of something big, like a whale. Maybe.
ReplyDeleteListen, dawg, this site is beginning to make me feel stupid. Just sayin'. Got any easy words?
leviathan: An absolutely huge pair of Levi's.
ReplyDeleteI knew a guy in high school named Thaddeus who was a drunk at 16. Honestly a wino in his teen years. What does that say about whales?!
ReplyDeletethat's a gargantuan definition
ReplyDeletehmmm...Jonah and the Tadpole doesn't quite have the same ring to it now does it.
ReplyDeleteUm, what?
ReplyDeleteHaving no hook, line, or cord (I think that is how it goes) I'm going to have to let this one go.
ReplyDeleteBesides, I already have a pet.
Yes, Ariel. I think Jonah is Hebrew for "cud."
ReplyDeleteYou got Nathan, Minka. That's something.
Al, also my grandfather.
OK, TLP, I'll look for an easy one tomorrow, but I already did "Cat."
Poobah, the size below mine.
Mutha, that under the sea, rehab is more effective?
Huge, Karma. Big.
Joel, that is just such a good point.
Did I say something, hermanita?
And how are Ariella and the prophets, Logo?
ditto TLP.
ReplyDeleteseriously, all i have at the moment is a gigantic headache. any thoughts on how i might alleviate this monstrous pain? (say something rude an i will SO slap you) ; )
Leviathan...
ReplyDeleteam I the only one anticipating OC's protest?
leviathan
ReplyDeletecomparable to the likes of behemoth and ziz
Levia-what?
ReplyDeleteI believe it was after he was spewed up onto the sand that Jonah acquiesced on Ninevah -GROSS to be in the belly of a whale!
ReplyDeleteWho ever heard of a saltwater tadpole?
I've heard this creature explained as a dinosaur, a huge crocodile, or the Loch Ness Monster.
ReplyDeleteAll I know is I would not want to see it in person, unless it was stuffed, of course.
A creature like that could really rush ramrod over someone. (Rush ramrod is what I said to Jason that day just before we met you for lunch. I meant to say "run roughshod." Oh well...)
Doug, Ariella is doing very well, I just bought her some chunks of raw cow leg to chew on so she is sitting on the back porch getting in touch with her inner lupus.
ReplyDeleteAs for the phrophets, the major ones are long and gory, the minor ones are depressing. Interesting isn't it that so much misery is meant to share the stage with joy unutterable.
I like whales. I got nothing else.
ReplyDeleteplease tell me Leviathan isn't your "nickname" for your *ahem* you-know-what.
ReplyDeleteunless, of course, you're a bigger "dork" than any of us ever would have imagined and/or believed. ; )
Neva, I think you should send your sons to North Carolina by train for an herb that only grows there called, um, Aperphagia, and have some coffee at home over a good book while they are looking. Sorry to hear about your headache, I hope my rx helps.
ReplyDeleteSar, I'm not sure. You may be.
Rio, and the world's smallest big man.
It's ok, Jenna. Back to the werewolves.
Terry, Bierce needed a biologist. Too bad you never met.
Haha, Jamie Dawn, I remember the roughshod. You really are that cute in person.
It is interesting, Logo. The bible is full of curiosities. Some you don't go to hell for.
Nessa, that'll do.
Neva, I'm about shaking laughing. Bad girl!
OMG! Neva!
ReplyDelete(Darnitall. Why didn't I think of that?)
Paradise is certainly lost here.
ReplyDeleteI'm with the feeling dumb and I forgot to say happy birthday to the mamma yesterday so happy birthday mama.
One of my favorite books.
ReplyDeleteA belated Happy Birthday to your mamma.
Applaudes Neva. That was just...classic.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your visit Doug...Jamie told me about you, too! Wasn't it great to meet her? Such sweet dear fun people!
ReplyDeleteTLP, I would have expected it from you.
ReplyDeleteCooper, we're not really a paradise crowd. I'll pass along your wish.
Of course it is, Hobbes.
Jenna, you'll encourage her to be funny.
Oldoldlady, welcome. She's a good egg, that Jamie Dawn. According to her, you're a fine, warm and elegant lady yourself.
Leviathan:
ReplyDelete(1) The size of the fish by the time the story has been told at least twice.
(2) While on a night dive, any creature or thing that suddenly appears inches from your mask.
(Thanks Doug!)
Neva, doesn't your version of laviathan need to be in the context of a water bed?
Sure, Morgan. What's the word for something that appears in front of your mask on the second telling?
ReplyDeleteLeviathan:
ReplyDeleteA word one will be power-slammed into the wall for using if they use it to describe the still overweight but working on it lady, that is to say, me.
Doug, the things that scare you and make you scream like a little girl* underwater don't make it into the stories at the bar.
ReplyDelete*No offense intended to little girls or people who used to be little girls.