Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Freedman
FREEDMAN, n. A person whose manacles have sunk so deeply into the flesh that they are no longer visible.
Watch out you might get what you're after Cool baby strange but not a stranger I'm an ordinary guy Burning down the house
Hold tight wait 'til the party's over Hold tight we're in for nasty weather There has got to be a way Burning down the house
Here's your ticket pack your bag; time for jumpin' overboard Transportation is here Close enough but not too far, maybe you know where you are Fightin' fire with fire
All wet yeah you might need a raincoat Shakedown thieves walking in broad daylight Three hundred sixty five degrees Burning down the house
It was once upon a place sometimes I listen to myself Gonna come in first place People on their way to work say baby what did you expect Gonna burst into flame
My house S'out of the ordinary That's right Don't want to hurt nobody Some things sure can sweep me off my feet Burning down the house
No visible means of support and you have not seen nothing yet Everything's stuck together I don't know what you expect staring into the TV set Fighting fire with fire
FREEDMEN, n. Excuse me, as soon as I finish vacuuming, fold the laundry, scrub the bathroom, wash the lunch dishes and start dinner, I'll pop back over and tell you exactly what I think of freedmen.
Jim likes freedwomen better! It doesn't matter to me as long as they feed me and take care of the house and Jim. It seems freedwomen can do that better and cheaper. ..
Freedman: Adam
ReplyDeleteFREEDMAN: With the bailout there are failures? Oh yeah there were. Money grubbing turds!
ReplyDeleteWatch out you might get what you're after
ReplyDeleteCool baby strange but not a stranger
I'm an ordinary guy
Burning down the house
Hold tight wait 'til the party's over
Hold tight we're in for nasty weather
There has got to be a way
Burning down the house
Here's your ticket pack your bag; time for jumpin' overboard
Transportation is here
Close enough but not too far, maybe you know where you are
Fightin' fire with fire
All wet yeah you might need a raincoat
Shakedown thieves walking in broad daylight
Three hundred sixty five degrees
Burning down the house
It was once upon a place sometimes I listen to myself
Gonna come in first place
People on their way to work say baby what did you expect
Gonna burst into flame
My house S'out of the ordinary
That's right Don't want to hurt nobody
Some things sure can sweep me off my feet
Burning down the house
No visible means of support and you have not seen nothing yet
Everything's stuck together
I don't know what you expect staring into the TV set
Fighting fire with fire
Burning down the house
No one can get to the point where you burn your paid off mortgage papers.
ReplyDeleteDetour
Freedman, someone has lost direction?
ReplyDeleteI looked over Jordan and what did i see?
ReplyDeleteCommin' for to carry me home
There was a band of angels,
a-commin after me
Commin' for to carry me home
Swing low, sweet chariot ...
I liked Morgan Freedman in the Shawshank Redemption.
ReplyDeleteFREEDMEN, n.
ReplyDeleteExcuse me, as soon as I finish vacuuming, fold the laundry, scrub the bathroom, wash the lunch dishes and start dinner, I'll pop back over and tell you exactly what I think of freedmen.
Jim likes freedwomen better! It doesn't matter to me as long as they feed me and take care of the house and Jim.
ReplyDeleteIt seems freedwomen can do that better and cheaper.
..
Are freed women free to hire a cleaning service? Do they have the option of take-out? What about Hunan Chinese delivery?
ReplyDeleteI love eggplant with garlic sauce for a vegetable side order.
A cousin is soon to marry a guy named Freedman... there's a marriage joke in there somewhere but it's too early in the morn to type it correctly.
ReplyDeleteActually, S'kraut, it isn't all that early. In fact, I feel beguiling seductive because the dishwasher is running this late at night.
ReplyDeletePlease remember to tell us all about your cousin in the morn!
Wait! Did I miss something? Are you giving away free men? Got pictures? (Or bank account information....better yet: both)
ReplyDeleteFirst and last, maybe, TLP.
ReplyDeleteIt happens, Thom. Live and let steal, I says.
That's a good song, Ms. Heads, and I'm sure very germane.
Not fast enough, Nessa. That much is surely true.
Excellent pun, Ariel.
Johnny, you claim to have written that and the chariot might just bring you back. "I Got Stripes" put your soul in jeopardy already.
Me too, Icy. And in that meteor movie even better.
Quilly, we'll be here when you're ready. Do you mind bringing something from the kitchen, when you come?
Adi, depends on how much they eat. Nice to see you over here.
Karen, your order is ready.
Saurkraut, I'm guessing it'll be his name that changes.
TLP, you didn't get my package?