Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Am I really first? Migawd, there are actually some bennies to being in the Eastern time zone. But I gotta get my rear into gear here. Just barely enough time to thank Doug for not being callous. Y'see:
CALLOUS, adj. Pointing out the link between Jane Henry and Billion Dollar Babies.
[open umbrella to ward off flying missiles, especially from the direction of NYC, and exits]
Shakalaka, shakalaka ... Chaka Khan, let me rock you Let me rock you, Chaka Khan Let me rock you, that's all I wanna do Chaka Khan, let me rock you Let me rock you, Chaka Khan Let me rock you cuz I feel for you, feel for you.
Callous: all those mean comments made by music teachers as you were growing up that you had no rhythm..."bang and scoop and woosh and sakalaka...you proved 'em wrong, uh huh, uh huh!
But the big mystery today son is how Jane could pitch forward and land on her back...I guess a dying gal will do anything to swallow that last piece o' raw, swimmy, slimy thang.
and i knew that and yet, i foolishly clicked before i could make the change! (initially i was shooting for an adjective... and then i shifted gears and just forgot to make the appropriate correction!)
sigh... i shall *blush* and i shall move on! (and color that "blush"...maroon) : P
tho', if i were referring to an "emotional band-aid", which i was, then, technically, doesn't that actually make my "callous" an adjective? (just wondering, because i really am confused by such things!) : D
Yes Kyah - I figured Doug's stories are G rated, if not PG - she's 8. She does want her own blog, but I said I'd have to find out if there is a child friendly place for her.
Doug - We did go back to last week's for the slideshow as Julian remembered.
aha! i feel so...enlightened! (what can i say? i'm old(ish) and very much out of grammatical practice!) at least i "tried"... and thank you for that, kind Doug, for you've been key in helping to expand the boundaries of my comment comfort zone!
honestly? you should just be glad i didn't leave a cheesy "knock knock" joke, as i am often wont to do! : P
Underneath that calloused heart of yours there's softness. I know it to be true, although I doubt you'd give your last chocolate truffle to me if I asked, so your callousness runs mighty deep.
I doubt I would have challenged that steam dohickey. I would have said something like, "Let them eat cake, " and then gone off to eat chocolate truffles under the shade of a nearby tree. Callousness comes in many forms.
Boy I am late to the party. Sportshow, Voting and work should be an excuse I hope. As always well written. Unfourtunately I don´t know Alice. Not yet that is... I also don´t know what the word means and have to check a dictionary. Be right back...
ok...that word means nothing to me! It can´t be applied to me in any shape or form. And I don´t care what everybody else thinks. I have a thick wall protecting my heart of stone! :)
Heart of stone - of course! By the way, Tali wanted to know "Is that old man Doug?". On the profanity thing, well, let's put it this way - I have a feeling that you have elevated many of our vocabularies in more areas than we might admit in such genteel company. Your mama sounds suspiciously familiar...
You're welcome Kyah - when Mommy's not working, wherever I go, the little ducks especially Tali are never far behind. I did just show her my blog earlier today and brought them over to Doug's for the story. Now they're all in bed including Mr. Scissorhands, so I'm enjoying some free time!
Alas dear brotha, I am afraid you are right! Pisces do not have it in their nature to be calloused... they are too attached to this element water and emotions run deep as they float about and feel both happiness and sorrow too deeply I am afraid! *sigh*
But they do dance a mean dance electric! Fo sho!
Ooooh! You met Puppytoes! She is delightful! Bohemians loooooveeee Puppytoes!
Have a good weekend and a great hike hermanito! (Yes, hermanito as a term of endearment... not literally little brother so be baffled no longer!)
Doug: You have In & Out there, so if I had a chance to steal one of YOUR burgers I would. I am entitled since I no longer have the pleasure of feasting at In & Out. I would smack and savor every bite right in front of you. Now, THAT'S calloused!!
Alice: My son knows the guitar callouses well. You gotta be tough to be good, and from that story Doug wrote, I know you are tough!
To hear the story, listen to the storyteller.
Am I really first? Migawd, there are actually some bennies to being in the Eastern time zone. But I gotta get my rear into gear here. Just barely enough time to thank Doug for not being callous. Y'see:
ReplyDeleteCALLOUS, adj. Pointing out the link between Jane Henry and Billion Dollar Babies.
[open umbrella to ward off flying missiles, especially from the direction of NYC, and exits]
Callous enough to say nah nah, we're meeting Sar tomorrow.
ReplyDeletejust sayin'.
Lookie here, all the little Pez girls in a row! Yes, another great story.
ReplyDeleteSar??!? Now I'm the jealous one!
O Ceallaigh, what are Billion Dollar Babies?
ReplyDeleteDddragon, I envy all of you. Have a ball.
Actonbell, haha and thanks. Et tu?
Yeah, Aral and in birth order no less. Big sis thinks she's so cool!
Shakalaka, shakalaka ...
ReplyDeleteChaka Khan, let me rock you
Let me rock you, Chaka Khan
Let me rock you, that's all I wanna do
Chaka Khan, let me rock you
Let me rock you, Chaka Khan
Let me rock you cuz I feel for you, feel for you.
Alice knows all this. Obviously. *NICE story!*
xoxo
Great story and a fitting definition Doug. Alice rocks!
ReplyDeletedddragron-you are so callous. have fun. meeting cyber friends is great fun.
See that wonderful girl Alice
ReplyDeletePure of heart, with no malice
Despite the stories you tell us,
Alice can never be callous
ygvegbl: If I'm Jane, you must be Tarzan
I loved it.
ReplyDeleteWhat a sweet, hearty story.
ReplyDeleteSweet and hearty, like my spaghetti sauce.
Callous: False toughness.
That story rocked1 To describe it any other way would be callous.
ReplyDeleteLove the story! I must be callous and leave right away for it would be even more callous to ignore my little one's pleas to come play in the garden!
ReplyDeleteGrandmaster Melle Mireille!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Kyahgirl and yes she does. You didn't happen to hear that her birthday's next week did you?
Hold on, Karma (nice poem, by the way) I don't see one letter in that verifier to suggest your translation. You're not making these up are you?
Thanks, Ariel
Cowgirl, that's the sound of putting down a trackline circa back when this was MY STORY!
Jamie Dawn, I'll have you know that not all callousness is fake. My insensitivity is strictly sincere.
Thanks, Little Blue Pill!
G, those children should be blogging!
thanks dawg. it's called creative liberty, i have a license to prove it
ReplyDeleteGo, Alice, GO!
ReplyDeleteFun stuff again, Mssr. Doug
I am partial to Ambrose's definition of callous.
CALLOUS, adj. Gifted with great fortitude to bear the evils afflicting another.
Callous: all those mean comments made by music teachers as you were growing up that you had no rhythm..."bang and scoop and woosh and sakalaka...you proved 'em wrong, uh huh, uh huh!
ReplyDeleteBut the big mystery today son is how Jane could pitch forward and land on her back...I guess a dying gal will do anything to swallow that last piece o' raw, swimmy, slimy thang.
Charming, thought-provoking, and a bang and scoop and woosh and shakalaka-ing good time!
ReplyDeleteCallous, adj: band-aid; protective layer between reality and self.
Ooooh! Shakalaka is my kinda word indeedy!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful story for one equally beautiful chica!
That definition makes me wanna be calloused! Oooooweeee!
Karma, please continue. You can fax over the license?
ReplyDeleteThanks, Logo!
Mama, I remember them saying I had no pitch. I'm not sure any injustice was done.
Puppytoes, thanks and like your definition (sh-you're using it as a noun, though)
Sure is Miz B. Good luck trying to be calloused, though. I'm not sure it's in your nature.
This is just like the show I saw on Animated Tales of the World, John Henry.
ReplyDelete-Tali
Well, you told me they should be blogging, so we sat on down for the story together. Ergo comment above.
ReplyDeleteg, that tali is your little one? cool. A blogger is born :-)
ReplyDeleteand i knew that and yet, i foolishly clicked before i could make the change! (initially i was shooting for an adjective... and then i shifted gears and just forgot to make the appropriate correction!)
ReplyDeletesigh... i shall *blush* and i shall move on! (and color that "blush"...maroon) : P
tho', if i were referring to an "emotional band-aid", which i was, then, technically, doesn't that actually make my "callous" an adjective? (just wondering, because i really am confused by such things!) : D
ReplyDeleteYes Kyah - I figured Doug's stories are G rated, if not PG - she's 8. She does want her own blog, but I said I'd have to find out if there is a child friendly place for her.
ReplyDeleteDoug - We did go back to last week's for the slideshow as Julian remembered.
Tali, you wouldn't be a child of G's would you? You remind me of her.
ReplyDeleteOh, G, there you are. I knew it!
Kyahgirl, resistance is futile, isn't it?
No, blushing, Puppytoes, it's just easier for me to correct. But, no. See the "an?"
g, true, but a warning, next week's story has a touch of potty humor. Like Shrek.
aha! i feel so...enlightened! (what can i say? i'm old(ish) and very much out of grammatical practice!) at least i "tried"... and thank you for that, kind Doug, for you've been key in helping to expand the boundaries of my comment comfort zone!
ReplyDeletehonestly? you should just be glad i didn't leave a cheesy "knock knock" joke, as i am often wont to do! : P
I am g's daughter. Kyahgirl said so.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the warning Doug - I'll preview it. Besides, I am sure she'll appreciate the potty humor.
ReplyDeletePuppytoes who?
ReplyDeleteWell, Tali, you're a good child for listening to your Aunt Kyah.
G, that'll be good. I do try to keep this site you-rated, though. Profanity is such a cheap heresy.
Underneath that calloused heart of yours there's softness. I know it to be true, although I doubt you'd give your last chocolate truffle to me if I asked, so your callousness runs mighty deep.
ReplyDeleteI doubt I would have challenged that steam dohickey.
I would have said something like, "Let them eat cake, " and then gone off to eat chocolate truffles under the shade of a nearby tree. Callousness comes in many forms.
Boy I am late to the party. Sportshow, Voting and work should be an excuse I hope.
ReplyDeleteAs always well written. Unfourtunately I don´t know Alice. Not yet that is...
I also don´t know what the word means and have to check a dictionary. Be right back...
ok...that word means nothing to me! It can´t be applied to me in any shape or form. And I don´t care what everybody else thinks. I have a thick wall protecting my heart of stone! :)
ReplyDeletecallous: a place made "used" that was once not so.
ReplyDeleteJamie Dawn, all the chocolate truffles I have are yours for the taking. Keep your greasy mits off my cheeseburger, though. I'm only telling you once.
ReplyDeleteMinka, riiiiiiiiight.
Mutha, excepting Minka, we all have them, don't we?
Late coming back but wanted to thank G for bringing Tali to us and to thank Doug for entrusting me with her Auntiedom. :-)
ReplyDeleteHeart of stone - of course! By the way, Tali wanted to know "Is that old man Doug?". On the profanity thing, well, let's put it this way - I have a feeling that you have elevated many of our vocabularies in more areas than we might admit in such genteel company. Your mama sounds suspiciously familiar...
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome Kyah - when Mommy's not working, wherever I go, the little ducks especially Tali are never far behind. I did just show her my blog earlier today and brought them over to Doug's for the story. Now they're all in bed including Mr. Scissorhands, so I'm enjoying some free time!
ReplyDeletesure, Douglas, give me your number. my license says Rule #1 is that there are no rules
ReplyDeleteitfmrf (obvious interpretation): radio, it makes you roll on the floor
OR
it figures, Mr.F!
itfmrf (creative interpretation): rules are followed by calloused fools and for the guidance of wise men
Have a lovely Sunday morning, Douglas, Walela and Willie and probably Dad as well. Hiking?
ReplyDeleteawwww ;)
ReplyDeleteI now have much to live up to.
I am speechless but still a little jealous that you get to take the weekends off.
callous - that thing I got on my finger while trying to learn how to play the guitar.
Kyahgirl, don't thank me. You have the teeth for it.
ReplyDeleteG, tell Tali yes, but it's an old picture.
Karma, there's one iron rule: Nobody does verifiers like Karma. Clever, and I take your hint.
Danke Schön, Minka, und genau. Wie jede Samstag und Sonntag aber nicht gestern.
Alice! Your birthday is a gathering storm. I'm a little suspicious of the "speechless" thing, though.
Shakalaka? I must get out a dictionary.
ReplyDeleteDoug - you really have never heard of Billion Dollar Babies?. You lucky sod. Well, lucky no more .. :).
ReplyDeleteAlas dear brotha, I am afraid you are right! Pisces do not have it in their nature to be calloused... they are too attached to this element water and emotions run deep as they float about and feel both happiness and sorrow too deeply I am afraid! *sigh*
ReplyDeleteBut they do dance a mean dance electric! Fo sho!
Ooooh! You met Puppytoes! She is delightful! Bohemians loooooveeee Puppytoes!
Have a good weekend and a great hike hermanito! (Yes, hermanito as a term of endearment... not literally little brother so be baffled no longer!)
Besos y hasta la pasta!
Minka: "Heart of stone?"... I don't believe it.
ReplyDeleteDoug: You have In & Out there, so if I had a chance to steal one of YOUR burgers I would. I am entitled since I no longer have the pleasure of feasting at In & Out.
I would smack and savor every bite right in front of you. Now, THAT'S calloused!!
Alice: My son knows the guitar callouses well. You gotta be tough to be good, and from that story Doug wrote, I know you are tough!
Aaah yes, what a girl wouldn't do. Nice story and really great description.
ReplyDeleteso are M&M's callous since they have hard shells? ;)
Fred, try the Leadbelly song Linin' Track instead. Taj Mahal does a great version on his Gient Step/De Ole Folks at Home album.
ReplyDeleteO Ceallaigh, that's funny considering.
Well, then, Miz B, you might be a candidate for callouses on your feet.
Having Double-Double Trouble, Jamie Dawn? Drop by next time you drive I-5 and I'll buy you one.
Still Life, don't you think so? Unfeeling little so-and-sos.