POSTSCRIPT, n. The only portion of a lady's letter which you need read, if you are in a hurry.
2006 Update: The part of a personal letter following the flattery.
P.S. The editor of this site is not responsible for the misogyny of M. Bierce. Women are.
and yet you seem to perpetuate it. (thank goodness for that!)
ReplyDeletep.s. is it possible i beat the Penguin today? whoa.
p.s.s. since it seems this week's WA is being brought to us by the letter "P", perhaps "Penguin" should be tomorrow's word?
ReplyDeleteNow I know what those stupid letters stand for! And all this time I thought it stood for something else.
ReplyDeleteSC
ps I'm kidding really!
Perpetually
ReplyDeleteSnarky
Postscript: Hey what hapened to my gest post? Why isint it on top anymore?
ReplyDeletePost script - that's usually where I add the stuff I forgot in the first place.
ReplyDeleteps - I'm getting closer to the first position!
7TH? I can live with that :)
ReplyDeleteMy favourite number. I owuld have been first, would Pascover have had published at the usual time!
ps...I like teh number two as well, and 25 for that matter. Do you think I should play teh lottery?
Puppybrose, I checked and it isn't in Bierce's dictionary. Are you feeling guilty?
ReplyDeleteSolace "Please Skip?"
Persistently, Sar.
Boy from S.A.C.A.D.A., time marches on. Your knees hurt.
Jenna, Postscript, n. Foreplay.
I have written many letters and I think Ambrose is right.
ReplyDeletep.s. I don't feel hated.
Postscript: The little kid of 11 years old wrapped in all the layers of adulthood.
ReplyDeleteJenna just crashed my brain. My eyes skimmed over her line. My brain literally skidded to a halt. After a couple seconds of paralysis, my eyes began blinking and slowly refocused on the line. I read it again. Unfortunately, all previous thoughts were lost in the crash and did not reload upon reboot.
ReplyDeleteP.S. please send money
ReplyDeletePostscript n. the most important line in a college student's letter home
Dang it! It was DOUG who crashed my brain with his comment to Jenna. See, I toldf you it went down -- and it took far too long to reboot!
ReplyDeleteWHAM. WHAM. WHAM. beats Doug over the head with umbrella WHAM. WHAM. WHAM.
ReplyDeletep.s. xoxo
p.p.s. please note that 3D used a bad word. As an adjective, but nonetheless.
ReplyDeletehelpfully,
xoxo
afterthought written post haste.
ReplyDeleteBut if the letter begins with 'Dear John', there would be no need to read further
PS: You will never get a Dear John letter from me, because your name is Douglas. Happy?
jtnkp: John turns naked when on Keep Peeling duty
woof
ReplyDeletep.s. grrrrr
Peanuts Soared
ReplyDeletePast Plaid Skirts
Pretty Pungent Palatable Sardines
Quilly: i think the term *you* defined is spelled Post $cript.
ReplyDeleteps... guilty, Doug? me? probably so.
Quilly: i meant "post$cript"
ReplyDeletePostscript: A once essential writing tool in the days preceeding word processing and email...now a designation used solely for effect; on par with the electronic smiley face.
ReplyDeleteAriel, I'm glad you don't feel hated. P.S. I bet Bierce would have liked a letter from you. You could speak cleverly of corruption together.
ReplyDeleteIndie, or the layers he's wrapped in.
Sorry, Quill. I'm not sure the Little Blue Pill and I properly considered the schoolhouse audience. I think Jenna was nice today, though.
Dddragon, Bob Casey and I wish you could vote twice.
Quilldancer, maybe, but you did fine with your definition.
Mireille, I'm sure I can speak for Dddragon when I say we appreciate the correction.
Karma, happy I'm not a John.
Brian, what you need to learn is horticulture. Marigolds keep away aphids, thorns protect roses, roses protect you and if that fails, there's daisies.
Hahaha, Icy. *prrrrrr*
Please Provide Prepared Paroxysms Soon, V.I.
Puppybrose, practice glory without guilt.
Sure Joel, and the missing transitional sentence.
Plenty
ReplyDeletePleasingly
Sardonic
Parasol Produced Paroxysms Precisely Produced Skillfully
ReplyDeleteStrike that second Produced, it should read....Provided
ReplyDeleteDear Doug: Your place is always a fun bash of wits. I don't know how I didn't drop a comment earlier, but apparently I came and went. Err, somehow, never mind. I'll leave now.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Puppy - that's a good one! $.S. (however you do the little eseey dollarey thingey).
Must behave...must not respond with naughty sarcastic comeback. Behaving today.
ReplyDeleteI should've titled my blog Postscript instead of Afterthoughts because that would've been cool.
ps: foreplay is a postscript for you? Oh Doug *shakes head*
ps x2: I tried. I tried so hard.
Postscript: salt 'n pepper.
ReplyDeleteBierce knows that women in love leave postscripts like this:
ReplyDeleteP.S. XX OO Hugs! Kisses!
And women scorned leave postscripts like this:
P.S. When you read this, I'll be gone... along with all your money.
Poor, poor Bierce.
postscript: punchline.
ReplyDeletelove backwards? then it will end with a "How do you do? Nice to meet you!" and start again?
ReplyDeletep.s. lovely idea.
I may not have understood something because some of my postscripts turned out longer than the letter.
ReplyDeletepostscript: blog font?
ReplyDeletepostscript: the last word and/or final gasp
ReplyDeletep.s. this will be mine.
p.p.s. at least for today.
p.p.p.s. i think.
Doug, my brain didn't short circuit over the subject matter. It froze because of cognitive dissonance. I was trying to decide how "post" could occur before "fore."
ReplyDeleteI now find myself wondering if your confusion over what "preceeds" and what "proceeds" had any direct effect on your current crumdugeony status.
Postscript: Always my favorite part of a letter, whether received or sending.
ReplyDeleteP.S. :-)
Please
ReplyDeletePlacate
Pontificating
Sar
P.S. You know, I have to wonder how Mr. Bierce came to his misogyny in reality. Was it an unfortunate maternal influence during childhood? An early love gone bad? Or are some men just born womenhaters? You know, the genetic/biological model. I wonder. xoxo
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a little kid, I didn't think a letter was complete without a P.S. And it was ALWAYS the first thing I read.
ReplyDeleteP.S., n. Doorknob therapy via letter-writing.
like Indie, my post scripts are usually longer than the message. Not today though. I'm outta words.
ReplyDeletep.s. that doesn't mean I can't have a good laugh while reading all the comments here.
It's a matter of historical debate just why Ambrose Bierce was so angry at women. Some say it's because they didn't treat him very well. Some say it's because they did.
ReplyDeleteParticularly plaintive paean, Sar.
ReplyDeletePalindromes Passed Properly Preface Purple Prose, Simian!
G, better late than never.
Anomie, I always thought the request at the end was just to justify the sucking up.
Came up with nothin', huh, LBP?
Brian, I like the obituary angle.
Puppybrose, a Salt n Pepa concert this year.
Jamie Dawn, you can tell alot by the hearts dotting the eyes. If they aren't filled in, you're dead.
Puppybrose, it must be close by now.
Actonbell, we should all own our own detestations.
Ariel, love backwards is wisdom. P.S. I have no idea what I'm talking about but it sounds so right.
Indie, POSTSCRIPT, n. Comments on a blog?
Puppy Please Somemore!
Product of, Quilldancer. Putting Post before fore is how I age younger than most.
Terry, it's kind of the maraschino part, isn't it?
Please Prohibit Pitiable Suckupery.
Mireille, it's probably the result of an unhappy marriage. Maybe his wife was misandrist.
Aral, what's doorknob therapy? I'm curious.
Kyah, nonverbal enjoyment is often every bit as good as nonverbal condescension.
Andrew, that was a great job of putting it into Bierce's words.
postscript: second thoughts.
ReplyDeletep.s. i don't know what's wrong with me, i really don't. i'm gong to bed now, and i'll try not to be such a verbal bother tomorrow.
p.p.s. i agree with you, by the way, Andrew's comment was positively Biercean. (assuming i even know what that means.)
P.S., I am not talking to blogger today...I left a comment here earlier and it is no where to be found (and that being the case, it was a very BRILLIANT comment I tell you).
ReplyDeleteDoorknob therapy, n. The phenomenon of saying the difficult thing that you really meant to bring up earlier just as you are reaching for the doorknob and leaving. e.g., "Well, I'd better call it a night. (Reaches for doorknob.) By the way, I think I'm gay."
ReplyDeletePuppybrose, you seem to know what that means pretty well.
ReplyDeleteGosh, Square. A tragic loss to american letters. Maybe you could remember under hypnotism?
Hahaha, Aral. Thanks. I think you are, too. Whoops, look at the time.
Postscript: The thing you intended to say when you first put quill to paper, but didn't remember again until you'd already signed the page and grabbed the sealing wax.
ReplyDeleteMore room for excuses.
ReplyDeleteP. S. Sorry to be late with this comment.