Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Absentee

ABSENTEE, n. A person with an income who has had the forethought to remove himself from the sphere of exaction.

2007 Update: An individual whose expanding good-fortune, wealth, ease and notoriety greatly exceed their virtue and effort, even on the cusp of election to committee chair.

30 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:15 AM

    first?

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  2. Anonymous5:20 AM

    sorry, that word ("first") has been absent from my vocabulary -- where this site is concerned -- for quite some time. and even when i have been first, i generally claim the spot on behalf of teh Penguin! but not today, bub. no siree. today i am absent of loyalty and/or honor. and/or sense. and/or any good thoughts on a definition.

    and/or caffeine.

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  3. Anonymous5:21 AM

    absentee: a person with little social sense and big crowded-room issue.

    Ariel

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  4. Anonymous5:26 AM

    and/or the ability to read anything thoroughly before racing to comment.

    Absentee: the status of the gray matter that "normally" resides between my ears. sigh.

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  5. Anonymous5:30 AM

    ABSENTEE, n. Nominee. One who elects to pay later.

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  6. Anonymous5:47 AM

    absentee 1) politician who takes a stand on a controversial issue by refusing to show up and take a stand. 2) a student from my classroom, sometimes also know as Ike, who will be absent today becausde there is a math test.

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  7. Abs + Tea = Absentee

    Quilly, I have math on the brain this morning. I'm in the college library at the moment, about to head off to class & take a math test of my own. Let's hope by then I have math in the brain!

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  8. Anonymous7:51 AM

    Sar: or, Abs 'n tee ~ bared-midriff in a tight shirt? (good luck on that test!)

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  9. Anonymous8:40 AM

    absentee: voting by leaving

    (too many gerunds?)

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  10. Absentee: Sounds like a liqueur, only less cordial.

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  11. Anonymous8:54 AM

    Absentee: 1. Like the Cheshire Cat, except leaving a vote behind. 2. A person with rights, just like anyone else. "If you prick us, do we not bleed?"

    ~ahem, Prick: ...

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  12. Absentee: It's the thought that counts.

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  13. Anonymous9:02 AM

    Absentee: "Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?" or much more effective in the morning: "Anyone? Anyone?"

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  14. I was absentie from skhool today.

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  15. Anonymous10:35 AM

    Absentee: "here", but not here.

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  16. Anonymous11:00 AM

    The person we can gossip about

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  17. That's right Lammy, you'd be best to be the last person leaving the room...or this world, as the case may be.

    Absentee: "You don't call, you don't write"...a Jewish mother's best friend.

    feytup: Yiddish for what the Jewish Mother becomes with the absentee.

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  18. Absentee no longer.

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  19. a senator running for president.

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  20. Anonymous12:32 PM

    uh...is it just me, or is the person responsible for this blog an absentee today?

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  21. Puppybrose, I couldn't quite put my finger on what was different, but that's it!

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  22. Puppybrose, yes'm. It's okay to look out for number 1, especially when she's absent.

    Ariel, I'm laughing because I've spent the last two days actually around the corner from big rooms filled with people I'm theoretically in.

    Puppybrose, don't confuse absenteeism with retirement.

    Amoeba, the nominee is ever in the room, its true.

    Quill, neither of those are rare types.

    Sar, have you found a hot pink pocket protector yet?

    Puppybrose, I couldn't do math after that image. Sar has a better shot.

    Mule, I am never getting enough gerunds.

    TLP, I think you might have the crown royal for today.

    Al, thanks for keeping order in my absence.

    And what, Mutha, could be more thoughtful than absence?

    Jenna, one of these days I need to see that movie. Ben Stein is my idol.

    Boy, be careful. If you don't do well in school, you're liable to end up writing poetry for robots.

    Puppybrose, that's why I'm logging in.

    Lammy, did you hear what Icy did?

    G, I think that piece of culture has spread.

    Mo'a and good to see you always.

    g. nat, that's almost all of them. Jim Webb probably has the place to himself most days.

    Puppybrose, still in San Diego, but gracing you during a long speech.

    G, you noticed!

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  23. absentee - One who generally causes less problems than a presentee.

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  24. absentee: The male physical being responsible for half my genepool. Unfourtunately the better half, I am afraid :)

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  25. I have no idea what Bierce's definition means.

    Yours threw me for a loop too.

    My brain is intact, but my comprehension is absent.

    Absentee voters send in their ballots good and early, then regret it after finding out at the eleventh hour that their shiny candidate is tarnished.
    Advice to leakers: leak early.

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  26. I've been wondering how long it was gonna be before you commented on my effort and virtue...

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  27. Poobah, that couldn't be truer.

    Minka, I guess that's why you have so many fans overseas. You got that from your donor.

    Actonbell, that was a funny definition. You'd be proud of me. I wrote this morning's post a little hung over. Absinthe straight.

    Jamie Dawn, I think Bierce's definition and mine for "absentee" were both mailed in.

    Square, you just sat there while you were elected. What value is virtue if not to manipulate? What worth has effort if brings you to board meetings? As a friend, I have to ask.

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  28. Look here, buster! I coulda been first if you weren't an absentee blogger.

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  29. How dare you cast aspersions on robotic poetry. Not only does it rhyme, the voltage makes it glow!

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  30. Sorry, TLP. I was writing when I should have been publishing.

    Elbot, no aspersions meant. I've been a great admirer of robot poetry ever since I learned that with solar panels you can make the meter run backwards.

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