Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Monday, March 05, 2007
Kill
KILL, v.t. To create a vacancy without nominating a successor.
2007 Update: To release from corruption and make admirable.
Jenna and CJ, good sleuthing. Sorry, all. I had written this one a few days back before deciding to use a different letter. I corrected the time, but forgot the date. TLP, it woulda served me right.
*Looks at him sternly* Where the heck have you been, Mister? Are there eye-witnesses, I could kill you right now...we have been worried sick over here!
1. To immerse in a stream. Especially in New York. See CEMENT SHOES.
2. To row merrily up and down a stream. Especially in the hills north of NYC. Fending off the dead cats as you row. No, wait a minute. Those hills are the place where they teach the cats to land on their feet when they fall. Isn't it? Y'know, cat skills?
Put down the gun and wait for me to finish filling out this last piece of paper here, willya? As if I'd be leaving behind anything anybody'd want.
helphhss: the Apple tech support call center in Eden.
frdrmyow: a catty message for the Ph.D. My just deserts, I suppose.
I've been sitting at my desk working (oh shut up) and I find myself going "Kill da wabbit, kill da wabbit." to Flight of the Valkyries. I wuv Elmer Fudd...huhuhuhu.
And no killing on the 19th!
And dang...look at those sparkly lips in first place.
i believe Pia gets to push back the Ides of March by a few days, if that's what she so desires!
my ADD brain on D(r)oug's (heh. get it?):
1. kill? hmmmm. good word 2. hahaha! that TLP is so damn funny. great word play on the title of one of my favorite books. 3. ya know, another great play on that book title is the name of our favorite "fusion" Mexican restaurant, "Tequila Mockingbird" 4. gee... come to think of it, this word is for the birds. 5. speaking of birds and/or the word "kill", that trip Joel and I took to Kill Devil Hills a few years ago was pretty cool. thank goodness Orville and/or Wilbur didn't kill themselves trying to fly like the birds... 6. my how time flies... is it really that late? (talk about killin' time). and, did somebody say something about Mexican food? man, i'd kill for some right about now. 7. wait. those calories would kill my diet. 8. kill that thought. 9. thought? kill this comment. 10. sigh. maybe no one shares my stupid/skewed sense of humor around here, but this comment will kill in Poughkeepsie.
Joel: kill\'kil\,n,-channel, creek - used chiefly in place names in Delaware, Pennsylvania, and New York. See: Bushkill, Schuykill, Cresskill, Cobleskill, Fishkill Plains, Peekskill, Plattekill, Poestenkill, Wallkill, West Kill, Wynanstkill...
"PETA, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, took issue with the town Fishkill's centuries-old name.
PETA wants the town to change its name, claiming it suggests cruelty to, well, fish." Others suggested changing it to Fish Save. People! Get over it!
Also see, Well hell's bells, I ain't eatin'em alive! Or would eating live fish be the nicer thing to do?? Mmmmmm.....
I think they're out to kill you, Doug, because of the wrong date on this word.
ReplyDeleteBut hey...doesn't this make me first?
Its a baseball term!
ReplyDeleteBaserunner Kill: an outfield assist in baseball
We thought someone had killed you this morning! (Does this mean all the trips to look for you are off?)
ReplyDeleteJenna and CJ, good sleuthing. Sorry, all. I had written this one a few days back before deciding to use a different letter. I corrected the time, but forgot the date. TLP, it woulda served me right.
ReplyDelete*big sigh of relief*
ReplyDelete2 seconds later:
*Looks at him sternly* Where the heck have you been, Mister? Are there eye-witnesses, I could kill you right now...we have been worried sick over here!
;)
KILL, v.
ReplyDelete1. To immerse in a stream. Especially in New York. See CEMENT SHOES.
2. To row merrily up and down a stream. Especially in the hills north of NYC. Fending off the dead cats as you row. No, wait a minute. Those hills are the place where they teach the cats to land on their feet when they fall. Isn't it? Y'know, cat skills?
Put down the gun and wait for me to finish filling out this last piece of paper here, willya? As if I'd be leaving behind anything anybody'd want.
helphhss: the Apple tech support call center in Eden.
frdrmyow: a catty message for the Ph.D. My just deserts, I suppose.
Hey no talking about killing in NY
ReplyDeleteSome of us have to live here
This would have been a perfect defintion, two weeks from today--your definition would have been so brilliant then--not that it isn't tody
Kill the engine, killdeer, killer bee, killer instinct, killer whale, killing fields, kill joy. D :)
ReplyDeleteDo I take it that the theme will be changed now that, the word is up?
ReplyDeleteKill em with kindness.
ReplyDelete"No that pocket protector does not make you look fat!"
road kill, it's what's for supper. Jamie Dawn, is that offer to cook for you still open?
ReplyDeleteTo Kill a Mocked Bird: Shoot Britney. Please.
ReplyDelete(If you use a camera to shoot her, please do not post the pix.)
Sorry, Minka. I came unstuck in time.
ReplyDeleteHaha, Amoeba. Well done with the verifiers too. A pun like Cat Skills is a risky try on "Kill" day.
Pia, are you planing to assassinate someone on the 19th?
Hey, new catvatar, Diane. You must killect them. Apologies, Amoeba.
I hope so, Mo'a. I'm running out of Slaughterhouse Five jokes.
Haha, G. Just geeky, I guess.
Quill, possum under glass?
TLP, that's no camera.
How about an art theme....such as....blue...an other artist explores blue
ReplyDeleteOr....promotion...shamefull promotion by this artist.
Promise you won't Kill me for this.
So, Brit's takin' your picture? Those shots just kill me.
ReplyDeleteI've been sitting at my desk working (oh shut up) and I find myself going "Kill da wabbit, kill da wabbit." to Flight of the Valkyries. I wuv Elmer Fudd...huhuhuhu.
ReplyDeleteAnd no killing on the 19th!
And dang...look at those sparkly lips in first place.
there is many you cannot create but there is nothing you cannot kill.
ReplyDeleteMo'a, I won't kill you for that. I'd even recommend my friends go take a look at a blue cat.
ReplyDeleteSilly me, TLP, I forgot my pants, too.
Jenna, I'm with you. Bless Elmer Fudd.
Ariel, only God creates. He's nice enough to share the killing.
I did a web search on "march 19 kill" and look what I got ...
ReplyDeletebjacck: what happens in Vegas ...
And Ariel obviously has never heard of the Hotel California ...
ReplyDeleteAnd in the master's chambers,
They gather for the feast;
They stab it with their steely knives
But they just can't kill the beast.
Last thing I remember, I was running for the door ...
...You can check out anytime you like
ReplyDeleteBut you can never leave...
In reference to today's word, James Bond is licensed to do it, and in the '80s, Duran Duran provided a view to it.
Hmmm, sounds rather provacative methinks.
Amoeba, you are right, there's enough you cannot kill, either.
ReplyDeleteYou can check out any time you like
But yu can never leave
Hubby says I can't print what I want to say cause they'll throw me in jail.
ReplyDeletepfttt!!!
To Kill Time
ReplyDeleteHow hostile...what did time ever do to you (no pictures, please)?
Amoebe, now that I think about, the song doesn't say the beast cannot be killed, it only says they cannot kill it.
ReplyDeleteall things have a murderer waiting for them.
Amoeba, so you're accusing Pia of Apicide? I wouldn't bet on Ariel not knowing that song.
ReplyDeleteSar, I could have gone the rest of my life without being reminded of Duran Duran's View to A Kill, but it's nice to see your heel.
Ariel, you guys are very limiting. Why can't I kill and leave?
I agree, Karen. Pffft!
Mutha, I should send you a recent photo.
Ariel, life is about matchmaking, isn't it?
i believe Pia gets to push back the Ides of March by a few days, if that's what she so desires!
ReplyDeletemy ADD brain on D(r)oug's (heh. get it?):
1. kill? hmmmm. good word
2. hahaha! that TLP is so damn funny. great word play on the title of one of my favorite books.
3. ya know, another great play on that book title is the name of our favorite "fusion" Mexican restaurant, "Tequila Mockingbird"
4. gee... come to think of it, this word is for the birds.
5. speaking of birds and/or the word "kill", that trip Joel and I took to Kill Devil Hills a few years ago was pretty cool. thank goodness Orville and/or Wilbur didn't kill themselves trying to fly like the birds...
6. my how time flies... is it really that late? (talk about killin' time). and, did somebody say something about Mexican food? man, i'd kill for some right about now.
7. wait. those calories would kill my diet.
8. kill that thought.
9. thought? kill this comment.
10. sigh. maybe no one shares my stupid/skewed sense of humor around here, but this comment will kill in Poughkeepsie.
Kill: to cut, cap, quit and/or cork.
my head hurts.
"Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.” ~Erma Bombeck
ReplyDelete(this explains, in part, my current good health and/or anticipated longevity)
One of the signs I drove past on my journey home this past Friday was for Freshkill, New York which I found oddly unsettling.
ReplyDeleteOh, thank you, Neva. Pia went over my head and you gave me a boost. Gosh, now I wish I'd thought of that.
ReplyDeleteActonbell, who among us isn't. But I do admire the elegance of your time-killing.
The hills have eyes Joel. I wonder why the pilot didn't announce that flyover.
Tough day at the office, friend?
ReplyDeleteNothin' but on this project, Dougie.
ReplyDeleteJoel:
ReplyDeletekill\'kil\,n,-channel, creek -
used chiefly in place names in Delaware, Pennsylvania, and New York. See: Bushkill, Schuykill, Cresskill, Cobleskill, Fishkill Plains, Peekskill, Plattekill, Poestenkill, Wallkill, West Kill, Wynanstkill...
"PETA, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, took issue with the town Fishkill's centuries-old name.
PETA wants the town to change its name, claiming it suggests cruelty to, well, fish." Others suggested changing it to Fish Save. People! Get over it!
Also see, Well hell's bells, I ain't eatin'em alive! Or would eating live fish be the nicer thing to do?? Mmmmmm.....
Is al talking about Killing Bill? Oh right it's killing the bill.
ReplyDelete;0
"You should never kill a boy on your first date", at least according to Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
2007 Update: To release from corruption and make admirable.
ReplyDeleteAhhhh - Mr. Pacover - I cannot improve upon your update.... It suits my thoughts 100 percent this bleak Monday... My employers should read it.
Great info TLP!
ReplyDeleteThe evil villain of Toyplayer's imaginary universe is Lord Killjoy. He is a Voldok, and if you're still alive, you probably haven't met one yet.
ReplyDeleteA guy could kill himself trying to top your definition, Doug.
ReplyDelete