Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Shahrazade's Wedding, Part III
Because A Thousand and One Nights Are Never Enough
To hear the story, listen to the marigolds.
To read the story, click on the tiger lily and ask what's up.
I looked around for the marigolds, but all I found was California Poppies. I love the living columns... and who would imagine a cunning lion to be the old woman? Usually old crones are... well, less favorably imaged. Great story today.
WHITEWASHn. tactic used to distract one from paying too much attention to detail -- rather like postponing a wedding to find just the right flower; or claiming poppies are marigolds by simply posting a caption.
G, I feel like you aren't talking about floristry but yes, absolutely.
Thanks, AP3.
Actonbell, I think every young woman understands the heart of old women. I don't know why I'd say that but it sounds wise, doesn't it?
Terry, this is what happens when you wake up with the post done. You're right, of course. OK, marigolds another day.
Why, thank you Minka, for dressing your comment in a compliemnt.
Look, Quilly, I did a google search for a picture of "Turkish marigolds" and that photo came up. You expect me to look at the pictures too?
There's my excuse, Amoeba, thank you. It's not that I don't recognize California poppies, it's that I know them only too well. Aren't marigolds supposed to be narcotic, too?
Marigolds narcotic? That depends on what the meaning of "marigold" is. Like what the meaning of "is" is, Bill. You've got pot marigolds, but I wouldn't recommend smoking them (P-U). French marigolds, which I wouldn't recommend putting in the boudoir (ditto). Mexican marigolds - for a nominal additional charge, you get castinets with them. Corn marigolds, which you don't want telling any jokes. Marsh marigolds, which are actually overgrown buttercups.
And finally, burr marigolds, which don't look much like marigolds but probably insisted on being called something, anything, besides "beggarticks". And they are supposed to have narcotic properties. Be careful with them, or you'll see poppies in strange places. Not to mention apostrophes in possessive pronouns.
Leave it to a woman to be able to come up with a way to make a lion want to tell it's story. You go girl! I must be really tired. I initially read "Bactria" as "bacteria" and "beasts" as "breasts." It puts a somewhat different twist on things read that way.
The previous commenter's comment made me chuckle. "Bacteria" & "Breasts" do make the story change in a funny way.
If I were that old crone, I'd never change back into an old crone again. It's funny that my Sunday sermon and your weekend story BOTH have stooped over old crones in them.
I'm enjoying the story. I believe Shahrazade is gonna wear the pants in the kingdom.
Terry, I've seen the picture of you at the summer of love reunion. We both know you know.
Uh, sure, Amoeba. That's what I meant to say. Is there a subject you aren't knowledgeable in? I'd like to write about it.
That's funny, Lily. I sometimes convert words into breasts too.
JD, mine doesn't fly for testes even.
G, as a teenager I once worked as a flower delivery boy. It doesn't lend itself as well as my young heart had hoped.
Theresa, I'm planning for this to wrap up by the end of December so you can almost hold your breath. Thank you for providing the upside to my posting poppies as marigolds, too. By the way, if you missed it, a couple years back we had a once-in-a-century poppy bonanza. I flew up to Sacramento and the desert west of Lancaster was gold.
Quilly, I suspected as much, but I have to say the fact that he knows what to look for shows a still overly-expansive base of knowledge. Skill with an encyclopedia is a sign of a mis-spent youth.
OK, TLP. I'll try to remember the word for next week. You and Weirsdo are dictators.
sorry, Mutha...no offense meant here. this comment was not directed at you, per se, if you read back into the comments a wee bit.... and i shall look into adjusting my caffeine intake, thank you.
I'd adore a cuppa. Please *holds out cup hopefully*...
Doug - Summer of Love was fun... Taj Mahal rocked. I know lots about California Poppies, being a native and loving the orange beauties. I like them so much better than marigolds :) Not too knowledgeable about the opium type... other than what I've read. I don't partake.
To hear the story, listen to the marigolds.
Can't resist the first thing, now I'm off to listen.
ReplyDeleteNice letting Scissors do the violin gig.
A little bit of a technical difficulty? It's saying "W'ere sorry - we can't find the homepage you've requested. I'll be back when they find it.
ReplyDeleteBummer! I'll come back. Excited to see orange marigolds!
ReplyDeleteThat's better. Happy to see a crone worked into your story and your story playing properly.
ReplyDeleteSo it's best to seek the finest flower and not be too obvious when trying to acquire it?
I love a good tale in the morning.
Beautiful writing. The story is progressing nicely...
ReplyDeleteI looked around for the marigolds, but all I found was California Poppies. I love the living columns... and who would imagine a cunning lion to be the old woman? Usually old crones are... well, less favorably imaged. Great story today.
ReplyDeleteperfect...The first three paragraphs are are brilliant and the rest of teh story an extraordinary homage to human folly dressed in compliments.
ReplyDeleteWord of The Day:
ReplyDeleteWHITEWASH n. tactic used to distract one from paying too much attention to detail -- rather like postponing a wedding to find just the right flower; or claiming poppies are marigolds by simply posting a caption.
Poppies ...
ReplyDeleteGotta watch out for that second-hand smoke. Might make one see marigolds in strange places.
G and AP3, sorry about that. Upgrade issues.
ReplyDeleteG, I feel like you aren't talking about floristry but yes, absolutely.
Thanks, AP3.
Actonbell, I think every young woman understands the heart of old women. I don't know why I'd say that but it sounds wise, doesn't it?
Terry, this is what happens when you wake up with the post done. You're right, of course. OK, marigolds another day.
Why, thank you Minka, for dressing your comment in a compliemnt.
Look, Quilly, I did a google search for a picture of "Turkish marigolds" and that photo came up. You expect me to look at the pictures too?
There's my excuse, Amoeba, thank you. It's not that I don't recognize California poppies, it's that I know them only too well. Aren't marigolds supposed to be narcotic, too?
Marigolds are very good for gopher control. Not very nice smelling either. I've heard they can be measured by inchworms. Narcotic? I don't know.
ReplyDeleteMarigolds narcotic? That depends on what the meaning of "marigold" is. Like what the meaning of "is" is, Bill. You've got pot marigolds, but I wouldn't recommend smoking them (P-U). French marigolds, which I wouldn't recommend putting in the boudoir (ditto). Mexican marigolds - for a nominal additional charge, you get castinets with them. Corn marigolds, which you don't want telling any jokes. Marsh marigolds, which are actually overgrown buttercups.
ReplyDeleteAnd finally, burr marigolds, which don't look much like marigolds but probably insisted on being called something, anything, besides "beggarticks". And they are supposed to have narcotic properties. Be careful with them, or you'll see poppies in strange places. Not to mention apostrophes in possessive pronouns.
Leave it to a woman to be able to come up with a way to make a lion want to tell it's story. You go girl!
ReplyDeleteI must be really tired. I initially read "Bactria" as "bacteria" and "beasts" as "breasts." It puts a somewhat different twist on things read that way.
The previous commenter's comment made me chuckle. "Bacteria" & "Breasts" do make the story change in a funny way.
ReplyDeleteIf I were that old crone, I'd never change back into an old crone again. It's funny that my Sunday sermon and your weekend story BOTH have stooped over old crones in them.
I'm enjoying the story.
I believe Shahrazade is gonna wear the pants in the kingdom.
Well florestry lends itself metaphorically to so many other areas in life, wouldn't you agree?
ReplyDeleteI'm waiting to hear how this ends. Love the poppies, they remind me of when I lived in California.
ReplyDeleteTerry, I've seen the picture of you at the summer of love reunion. We both know you know.
ReplyDeleteUh, sure, Amoeba. That's what I meant to say. Is there a subject you aren't knowledgeable in? I'd like to write about it.
That's funny, Lily. I sometimes convert words into breasts too.
JD, mine doesn't fly for testes even.
G, as a teenager I once worked as a flower delivery boy. It doesn't lend itself as well as my young heart had hoped.
Theresa, I'm planning for this to wrap up by the end of December so you can almost hold your breath. Thank you for providing the upside to my posting poppies as marigolds, too. By the way, if you missed it, a couple years back we had a once-in-a-century poppy bonanza. I flew up to Sacramento and the desert west of Lancaster was gold.
Doug, imagine if Will Rogers had had the Internet ... ;)
ReplyDeleteDawg -- if you want to stump OC just make certain that whatever you write about can't be accessed through Wikipedia .....
ReplyDeleteOh. Hi, OC. Heh. Oops.
I want some jasmine tea.
ReplyDeleteGreat tale you got going here. You really do have a gift. But can't we have a "word of the day?"
I don't think those are marigolds...
ReplyDeleteAmoeba, that's not hard, brother.
ReplyDeleteQuilly, I suspected as much, but I have to say the fact that he knows what to look for shows a still overly-expansive base of knowledge. Skill with an encyclopedia is a sign of a mis-spent youth.
OK, TLP. I'll try to remember the word for next week. You and Weirsdo are dictators.
No, Mutha, I know. *sigh* I know.
oh, for Pete's sake,
ReplyDeletejust let them be marigolds...!
sheesh!
let us revel
in the beauty and perfection
of imperfection
and humanness.
Oh okay! Ya say one thing around here and people get touchy!
ReplyDelete(I don't think javajazz has had enough java...or maybe too much)
sorry, Mutha...no offense meant here.
ReplyDeletethis comment was not directed at you, per se,
if you read back into the comments
a wee bit....
and i shall look into adjusting
my caffeine intake, thank you.
The Marigold Battle. As usual, a couple of a hundreds years later nobody will remember it was over poppies.
ReplyDeleteCoffee anyone?
I'd adore a cuppa. Please *holds out cup hopefully*...
ReplyDeleteDoug - Summer of Love was fun... Taj Mahal rocked. I know lots about California Poppies, being a native and loving the orange beauties. I like them so much better than marigolds :) Not too knowledgeable about the opium type... other than what I've read. I don't partake.
Thank you, JJ. So I'm a few petals short of a daisy, right?
ReplyDeleteMutha, I guess botany is a piety people still tolerate.
JJ, add a cup for me, and one more for the road.
Ariel, can you add a little opium to mine?
I figured you'd say that, Terry. How many finger am I holding up? And what colors are they?