Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Hatchet
HATCHET, n. A young axe, known among Indians as a Thomas-hawk.
HATCHET, n. Something buried by peaceable people - in a well-marked place for later retrieval.
I'm not feeling very peaceable this morning. "What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick." Isn't the average lifespan of a pit bull eight years, and isn't that more than enough?? If, in November, the pit bull party, lipstick and all, isn't wiped off the face of America, We the People will deserve to rot in Hades.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled satire.
Hatchet...tool used by GOP in their extreme make-over..adultery the new theme of GOP(see McCain,see Giuliani),what happens in Minneapolis stays in Minneapolis,LOL
I was wondering about the 13 roses, too, I thought it was somehting American, roses are so expensive here that you buy as few as possible, rarely a dozen, but now that I understand, it is a beautiful metaphor, Doug!
Hatchet: Almost rhymes with 'fetch it.'
ReplyDeleteHatchet: At first glance looks like jacket.
Hatchet: Sung to the tune of Elton John's Rocket Man, "I'm a Hatchet Man ..."
..
Yes, jim. Hatchet man.
ReplyDeleteExcept that McCain has gone with a hatchet woman. A stevie nicks tune comes to my mind.
Hatchet: Place to leave your hat. Usage: Leave your hat with the hatchet girl.
ReplyDeleteHATCHET, n. Something buried by peaceable people - in a well-marked place for later retrieval.
ReplyDeleteI'm not feeling very peaceable this morning. "What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick." Isn't the average lifespan of a pit bull eight years, and isn't that more than enough?? If, in November, the pit bull party, lipstick and all, isn't wiped off the face of America, We the People will deserve to rot in Hades.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled satire.
HATCHET n. implement used for cutting chopping, and/or pruning syn. tongue
ReplyDeleteAmoeba: I would have said, a seed that when buried turns fruitful and multiplies.
ReplyDeletehatchet - A tool often said to be buried in peace but just as often buried in an opponent's heart.
ReplyDeleteHatchet...tool used by GOP in their extreme make-over..adultery the new theme of GOP(see McCain,see Giuliani),what happens in Minneapolis stays in Minneapolis,LOL
ReplyDeletethirteenth rose--12 for girl friend,one for the wive....New GOP theme
ReplyDeleteQuilly, when you're done with O.C. can I have him?
ReplyDeleteI don't get it (the thirteenth rose) sigh. Hatchet: a must-have tool for every Boy Scout.
ReplyDeleteJim, I miss liking Elton John.
ReplyDeleteWhich song, Sauerkraut? I'm puzzled.
TLP, I've already fallen for that one once.
Thanks, Amoeba. Last night's convention got pretty mixed reviews, didn't it?
Haha, Quill.
And that, Weirsdo, is why extended education in the humanities is for real.
Poobah, the one probably precludes the other.
Welcome, Anonymous, although the Democratic trolling is usually handled by Sauerkraut.
TLP, you're still a vixen.
Actonbell, In My Sincerely Qualified Opinion?
Terry and Actonbell, thank you more than (my) words can say. It was a failed joke on the trojan horse, roses usually coming by the dozen. Heh.
I was wondering about the 13 roses, too, I thought it was somehting American, roses are so expensive here that you buy as few as possible, rarely a dozen, but now that I understand, it is a beautiful metaphor, Doug!
ReplyDeleteTLP, certainly, however, I have my sights set on at least 30 years.
ReplyDeleteAriel, that's the sign of a bad metaphor, but thank you.
ReplyDeleteCareful, Quilly, TLP can wait that long.
And a good nurse.
ReplyDeleteDoug, was somebody asking for your opinion?
ReplyDeleteHow many times have you been over the Cukoo's nest, Icy?
ReplyDeleteI suppose not, thief hatchet.
I thought maybe there was a sale on roses.
ReplyDeleteAt least they weren't black.
Hatchet: the students news paper at GW University.
Yea, I know your definition was better, but mine is true.