Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Dictator
DICTATOR, n. The chief of a nation that prefers the pestilence of despotism to the plague of anarchy.
That person who can delete emails, can cause misery for most of a nation, and commands the eyes, ears, mouth and space between the head of the person who is supposed to be the leader.
hah! Sar, unless i miss my guess, you just gave that definition, yourself!
lovelovelove the update, tho' you left out a couple of things:
Dictator: A citizen with a sore tooth; a baby in a wet diaper; a dog in need of a treat/snuggle/walk. (yeah yeah, there are more, but the dictator in my brain says "coffee", and being the good citizen that i am, i must obey)
dictator for me it is a little voice implanted in my head by my first step-mother, whom I've not seen since I was 6: not good enough, not good enough, not good enough
Oh crap! Really? So what does more than one sore tooth,three hours of dental appointments just this week and more in the week to come make a bohemian?
Dios mio! Who knew? Hey, am I not supposed to be rich then? There is something really wrong with a poor dictator... that would simply qualify me as schizo... so, what are you saying with all this then? You think I'm a schizo? Huh? HUH?
Ha, ha, ha, haaaa! I figured some narcissism thrown in the mix might come in handy! And with that,
I hate to admit it, but Sar's tawdry direction with this was exactly what I thought as well. I was going to say a dictator is a tater shaped like a ..., you know what. I will continue now with more class.
!
ReplyDeleteDICTATOR, n. One who gives dictation, and means every word of it. America's preferred type of political leader - until after it's too late.
ReplyDelete*wonders who'll be first to offer the obvious Richard Potato (that being the PG13 version) definition. TLP? Snuppy??*
ReplyDeletemy too long comment didn't take
ReplyDeleteThat person who can delete emails, can cause misery for most of a nation, and commands the eyes, ears, mouth and space between the head of the person who is supposed to be the leader.
dictator: leader of any group consisting of more than one person, without the soft velvet wrapping and the anointment of God
ReplyDelete....and we thought we would never have one in this country.
ReplyDeletehah! Sar, unless i miss my guess, you just gave that definition, yourself!
ReplyDeletelovelovelove the update, tho' you left out a couple of things:
Dictator: A citizen with a sore tooth; a baby in a wet diaper; a dog in need of a treat/snuggle/walk. (yeah yeah, there are more, but the dictator in my brain says "coffee", and being the good citizen that i am, i must obey)
dictator: a Platonist with a heavy gavel. A Roman with purpose. A boss with a keen sense of time.
ReplyDeleteDictator: Chairman of the Bored.
ReplyDeletedictator for me it is a little voice implanted in my head by my first step-mother, whom I've not seen since I was 6: not good enough, not good enough, not good enough
ReplyDelete"A Roman with purpose." - it's just too funny!
ReplyDeletedictator: God
AL: brilliant!
ReplyDeletedictator: when re-painting images from post cards just doesn´t cut it anymore!
Wow, no punks in the house?
ReplyDeleteThe Dictators: A great American punk band, pre-Romones. Their song "Faster and Louder" got me through my teens.
Reminds of one of my favorite "dictator" movies, Moon Over Parador (1988) starring Richard Dreyfuss. Look-a-like actor fills in for fallen dictator.
ReplyDeleteSame basic premise applied in the movie Dave (1993) with Kevin Kline except the fill-in was an accountant.
Dictator, benevolent: Walela
ReplyDeleteDictator, not so benvolent: teh penguin
*runs away*
meow!!
Oh crap! Really? So what does more than one sore tooth,three hours of dental appointments just this week and more in the week to come make a bohemian?
ReplyDeleteDios mio! Who knew? Hey, am I not supposed to be rich then? There is something really wrong with a poor dictator... that would simply qualify me as schizo... so, what are you saying with all this then? You think I'm a schizo? Huh? HUH?
Ha, ha, ha, haaaa! I figured some narcissism thrown in the mix might come in handy! And with that,
BOHEMIA FUERA!
Quilly, I know that voice, dammit! Before I was 10, I had my epitaph all sorted out:
ReplyDelete"B+"
Speaking of lookalike actors: ?
The link is supposed to be to Charlie Chaplin. Tired of Blogger being a bloody dictator about script.
ReplyDeletedicator - a two year old.
ReplyDeleteI'd go into detail but...why?
Minka, nicely edicted.
ReplyDeleteAmoeba, if you want to be anointed first citizen, attack the others.
Sar, are you saying Dictator, n. Vice-president?
And Pia, Dictator, n. Special Assistant to The President?
Great definition, Minka, poetic and clever. Dictator, n. A tyrant with no tiara?
Correct, Mo'a. We thought we'd have millions of them.
Neva, I'm sure I don't know what you mean by the others. Mmmm. Coffee!
Mule, you got caught blogging, didn't you? Those were great examples. I'm partial to "A platonist with a gavel." Subtle and brilliant.
Al, great pun. I have no idea why Bozo The Clown jumped into my head when I read it.
Quilly, that's good enough.
Ariel, though shalt not take his name in vain, you mean?
Only you, Minka.
Mutha, I had a notion your past might be checkered. Now I think maybe it's all black.
Joel, I think for the sake of your marriage you might want to add Duck Soup.
Laura, can cats use a doggy door?
Hermana, vives para el colmillo, reglas para el colmillo.
Ah, yes, Amoeba. Adenoid Hynkel.
Jenna, there will be enough whys when your nephew next visits.
I had a crush on a guy in highschool who wore black and white checkered Vans sneakers. I thought they (and he) were the coolest.
ReplyDeleteHe played the Talking Heads for me for the first time.
So I DO in fact have checkers in my past.
Sar! I would NEVER think of such a thing! (I'm not clever enough. Dangitall.)
ReplyDeleteDictator: Household member with the most severe neurosis. Can be passive-aggressive or overt.
Doug...yes, of course you're right. Nice save...please consider previous post amended.
ReplyDeletedefinitely Doug! That's why I fit in so well with Willie and Walela!
ReplyDeleteMutha: Dude, I am so punk (ha). I caught that "dictator" *and* let is pass.
ReplyDeleteMutha, you're practically a child of the light. Van's? Dude!
ReplyDeleteTLP, what's overt like?
Joel, I like to see this site as 1/2 sarcasm and 1/2 marriage counseling. It's a fine balance.
Laura, I figured sneakiness was a part of it.
Mule, you aren't even old enough to remember the Ramones. What's the story here?
There was a naked pint-sized dictator in my kitchen this morning. What would you do if he refused to dress? I told him to drink his orange juice.
ReplyDeleteI think I just missed The Dictators Mutha - I'll give a listen from home, although I am familiar with The DelLords that one of them went on to form.
I hate to admit it, but Sar's tawdry direction with this was exactly what I thought as well.
ReplyDeleteI was going to say a dictator is a tater shaped like a ..., you know what.
I will continue now with more class.
Dictator: a ME monster.
...a fine and difficult balance and yet such a necessary service! Bless you Doug.
ReplyDeleteDoug: the Overt Dictator is like the covert Dictator with the cover removed.
ReplyDeleteG, that's an excellent redirect of Dear Leader.
ReplyDeleteJ.D. A ME monster is classy. Thank you for overcoming the temptation.
At your service, Joel.
Actonbell, shouldn't that be reposed? It sort of makes Bierce's point pretty well, doesn't it?
TLP, I've heard of that.
a man who has two mouths, one ear, 2 iron fists, and a houseful of firearms & ammunitions.
ReplyDeletehe also has a wife with roomful of shoes and a tubful of swiss account deposit slips.
Your people did a very good job here
ReplyDeletetoday.
Fourtunitly I am a President not a Dictater.
ReplyDeleteDictatorship: When a people have been chosen by their leader.
ReplyDeleteDictator: A person whose death-day will be celebrated more than his birthdays.
UaMQrI,
Morgan
Asiansmiles, your words are well-marced.
ReplyDeleteCooper, you're the benignest of despots.
Boy, that is good news. How are your civics classes going?
UaMQrl to you, too, Morgan. I mean that.