Monday, November 23, 2009

Tope

TOPE, v. To tipple, booze, swill, soak, guzzle, lush, bib, or swig. In the individual, toping is regarded with disesteem, but toping nations are in the forefront of civilization and power. When pitted against the hard-drinking Christians the abstemious Mohammedans go down like grass before the scythe. In India one hundred thousand beef-eating and brandy-and-soda guzzling Britons hold in subjection two hundred and fifty million vegetarian abstainers of the same Aryan race. With what an easy grace the whisky-loving American pushed the temperate Spaniard out of his possessions! From the time when the Berserkers ravaged all the coasts of western Europe and lay drunk in every conquered port it has been the same way: everywhere the nations that drink too much are observed to fight rather well and not too righteously. Wherefore the estimable old ladies who abolished the canteen from the American army may justly boast of having materially augmented the nation's military power.

2009 Update: To seek temperance in the bottom of a bottle. To be lush in view of the withered. To err among accountants or sin before the prim.

14 comments:

Nessa said...

This explains why I'm so confused: German ancestors who have hops in their baby formula and Native American ancestors biological allergic.

Thanksgiving MeMe

Jim said...

..
We'll tope and tipple
I'll do my tippling tonight
toping then for you
..

Jamie Dawn said...

Tope: often paired with toke.

Happy Monday!
It's almost Turkey Day!!
I'm ready to eeeeeeat!

Tom & Icy said...

A lapping tongue splashes unwise words.

the amoeba said...

TOPE, v. To get drunk. TOPIARY: What happens to trees and bushes when the drunk gets hands on pruning tools.

Ariel the Thief said...

There is no toreador and no Mohammedan. Geez. Dead writers never learn?!

Thom said...

TOPE: Where's the asprin!!! I feel awful. But I imagine you tope daily you get past the need for them.

quilly said...

I just received a Jack Daniel's Cookbook and have been serving a lot of drunken dishes.

actonbell said...

Cheers!

TLP said...

Tope: like toke and toe. One over the line.

Ariel the Thief said...

"But I imagine you tope daily you get past the need for them." LOL Thom! What's worse than not being able to walk but still being able to think rationally?

Cooper said...

It's the way I spell taupe after I've seen the bottom of too many bottles.

Not aspirin bottles.

unliali ---- what the heck kind of crazy word verifications ...

Doug said...

Actually, Nessa, looking to ancestors for explanations might explain why you are so confused.

My turn, Jim? I usually teetotal instead.

Maybe in your house, JD. I think there's nothing more appalling than a damp joint.

Icy, I think we should promote you to Shaman Icy. You are a very wise girl.

Amoeba, that's pretty funny. Every time I see topiary I wonder what went wrong. Sober folk anthropomorphize dogs, not bushes!

Ariel, dead writers are slightly slower on the uptake than living readers, I imagine. Toreadors?

Thom, I'd think that or maybe you just learn where all the aspirin are and how full the bottles are.

That sounds good, Quilly.

Bottoms up, A-bell!

Well done, blogmama!

Ariel, why would someone who can think rationally want to walk?

Coop, you mean when you look into the mirror and your black hair and white skin run together?

Hobbes said...

My former wife, Kathryn, is certainly the best sword wielder in her gang.