Friday, March 21, 2008

Cerberus

CERBERUS, n. The watch-dog of Hades, whose duty it was to guard the entrance — against whom or what does not clearly appear; everybody, sooner or later, had to go there, and nobody wanted to carry off the entrance. Cerberus is known to have had three heads, and some of the poets have credited him with as many as a hundred. Professor Graybill, whose clerky erudition and profound knowledge of Greek give his opinion great weight, has averaged all the estimates, and makes the number twenty-seven — a judgment that would be entirely conclusive is Professor Graybill had known (a) something about dogs, and (b) something about arithmetic.

2008 Update:  A three-headed hell-hound dispatched by Death and harrassed by Heracles, demonstrating the principle purpose of theology: that what a god anoints, man seeks to silence.

A good Good Friday to the faithful and TGIF to atheists, Unitarians and sundry socialists.

11 comments:

Omnipotent Poobah said...

cerbe-r-us: A toy store for 3-headed dogs.

mireille said...

"seeks to silence..." or actively ignores. It gives three headed dogs a bad rep and they resent it. xoxo

Jamie Dawn said...

A blessed Good Friday to you and a wonderful Easter weekend as well, also, in addition, too.
My momma's flight will land in just over an hour.
Yipppppeeeeeeee!!!!!!!
Be sure to eat some chocolate.
It is good for the soul.
Amen & Amen.

TLP said...

Every Friday is good, but I've never understood what was so good about being crucified. That had to leave a scar.

karma said...

good one, dawg

the amoeba said...

Satan's screamed curse shook the bowels of Hell, silencing for a moment the tumults of the torments with a greater fear. Screwtape rushed to the Adversary's office to discover the cause, hoping to survive the experience.

"Someone's stolen my dog!" bellowed the Artist Formerly Known As Lucifer. And now these [ptui] saints are getting in here. Clueless goody-goodies. I'm going topside."

The Chief Devil landed in the Research Triangle area of North Carolina. There he found plenty of dogs with three heads, as well as other body parts variously multiplied. But though all were his, and he was pleased to see the work of his white-coated agents prospering, none answered to Cerberus.

He dropped in on Michael Vick, and after an exchange of pleasantries asked if Vick had seen his dog. If he had, Vick answered, he would have added him to his stable, and Vick's bets would all have come good. "But you might consider, sir, a visit to Washington, DC."

Whither the Devil took his cloven hooves. And was rewarded when his summoning whistle was answered by the roar of the ravening beast.

Cerberus had been hired to guard the White House.

Satan shook his head. "I might have known", he said.

quilly said...

For the millionaire's vacation,
No sun and relaxation.
He chose hell instead,
To rest his head,
To Hades's consternation.

With Cereberus guarding the portal,
T'was no passage for a mortal,
But the millionaire tried,
And so he died,
And that's the end of my report, all.

Jim said...

Cerberus is out of Adi's and my league.

Cerberus just reminded me, are we going to hear about Chicago from you?
..

Doug said...

Poobah, three-headed dogs need toys, too.

Mireille, nothing a bone couldn't fix.

JD, say hi to the nut queen for me.

TLP, what's good for the customer isn't always good for the merchant.

Thanks, Karmatta.

Amoeba, I'm sure C.S. Lewis is comfortable in his grave.

Quilly, you know I'm loving the Limerick.

Jim, it's on a big lake. TSDUFF and her bear are great folks.

Minka said...

three headed dog? There is one in harry Potter too :) Do you think Harry Potter will become the mythology reference for the next generation?

Doug said...

Maybe but probably not the one after.