Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Gnu

GNU, n. An animal of South Africa, which in its domesticated state resembles a horse, a buffalo and a stag. In its wild condition it is something like a thunderbolt, an earthquake and a cyclone.
A hunter from Kew caught a distant view
Of a peacefully meditative gnu,
And he said: "I'll pursue, and my hands imbrue
In its blood at a closer interview."
But that beast did ensue and the hunter it threw
O'er the top of a palm that adjacent grew;
And he said as he flew: "It is well I withdrew
Ere, losing my temper, I wickedly slew
That really meritorious gnu."
Jarn Leffer
2009 Update: A beast with a goat's beard, the hooves of a deer and the shoulders of a boar which is absent from mythology because it lacks the lust, cowardice and malice that make such animals exotic to fabulists.

16 comments:

Ariel the Thief said...

Funny looking beast indeed. Like its creator stopped before finishing it, and asked himself, "Am I sure?".

dilazi - Delilah lazy in my arms

Jim said...

gnu -

Should your little gnu
meet my would-be soaring foo
wonder what they'd do
..
Jim's fooie foo bird tale
..
Doug's word verification this morning:
sedacton
why can't I type that without ending it in "ion?
..
second chance word: "fling"
..

Nessa said...

You spelled gun wrong, Doug.

Tuesday's Tales in Two Hundred - Going In Circles

TLP said...

Good crossword puzzle word. I've never found a way to work it into casual conversation however. Maybe, Gnu pass the potatoes please?

the amoeba said...

Actually, Doug, the Greek fabulists did hear of the gnu from one of the Argonauts. An agent risked the crossing of the Sahara to offer the gnu a lucrative contract.

But the beast, being both meditative and meritorious, said:

"Your offer is tempting. But your audience coverage, being restricted to the Mediterranean region, is really limited. And besides, I've been following the population statistics for the centaur, the griffin, and the unicorn, and ever since they signed on with you, the numbers have been really alarming.

"I think I'll wait until the invention of the computer. Then I really will be famous."

TRUE®* story!

* Tale, Reality Unverified, Edited

Logophile said...

I dunno, it certainly looks like it could generate some malice and lust, given the right motivation.

Anonymous said...

Gnu - Sarah Palin?

Flipside Florida said...

La Chevre wrote: I'm glad the programmer recognized his error.

Doug wrote: I'll bet digital cows are easier to milk.

Doug wrote: Nope, Nessa. Just a tv show or a User ID.

Twitter follow request wrote: ZipZap5079.

Nessa just wrote an hour ago over at Stuffed Animal Tales: I have some Vallium I could let go of for say a song and a dance.

I've just started singing, my dear.

(Is my secret-decoder name supposed to be Sarah Palin?)

Jim said...

Why isn't anyone mentioning the African 'wildebeest'?
He is a spitting image of the gnu.

Wildebeest
..

quilly said...

Que pasa?

Anonymous said...

a symbol of all
political parties
WHY
swarm intelligence

need more be said ?

...(yes)

Anonymous said...

...(my pondering points)

Doug The Una said...

Haha, Ariel. Theology by oddity.

I'll ask you, Jim, what's that to you?

Nessa, a word of advice: Never correct the spelling of gun.

Gnu what? Neither have I.

Amoeba, I really like the registration mark by "true."

Logo, I hope that's not what you're teaching your children.

Why not, Thom.

Depends on whether you're an inkblot, Flip. By the way, you heard from La Chevre?

Jim, as I understand it, he is a gnu.

Actonbell, don't you think a new gnu should be knoodle?

Yeah, Bear. A little more probably needs saying.

sauerkraut said...

I gnu I'd find some interesting reading here today.

Too bad I'm a dollar short, too.

Cooper said...

If only Eric Carle has written about the Gnue, instead of that very hungry caterpillar I'd be able to make myself look good here tonight.

weirsdo said...

I gather one should not pooh-pooh
a beast who's tempered like the gnu.
But if one cannot make gnu stew,
perhaps the thing I heard is true
about the purpose of the gnus:
To answer crossword puzzle clues.