Thursday, November 17, 2005

Cannon

Cannon, n. An instrument employed in the rectification of national boundaries.

2005 Update: Civilization's herald trumpet.

News Item: Waking Ambrose reader gets good press despite association. Our own Pia was recognized by the (click) Long Island Press today.

36 comments:

dddragon said...

Cannon: Large, bald detective who always got his man but never seemed to get a girl.(not my fav theme song, however.)

weirsdo said...

(pl.) Ornaments for parks, where they represent their own fodder.

Sar said...

Cannon:A large mounted weapon that fires heavy projectiles.

(See Karl Rove)

Doug said...

That's great, Ddd. I remember that show (barely.) I think my dad liked it.

Dunno, Weirsdo, I've seen park cannons use other fodder.

Sar, when did someone get fired?

pia said...

cannon; every time a certain president or vp open their mouths they shoot cannons of misinformation; it's never projectile as that would make sense.

And then they walk down cannons of gloom hoping to avoid cannons of rational fodder

But alas as they wander the cannons they mistake the open mouthed people choking on cannon fodder for people in awe of them

ME Strauss said...

the heartbeat of destruction

Doug, are you compiling these?
Having just joined in, I maybe asking something you're already answered. But it sure would make fodder for a "Modern Day Cynics Thesaurs/Dictionary." :)

Sar said...

Doug - Oh how I long for the day. Even "Heck of a job Brownie" resigned. Jeesh! Oh wait, I'm not on my own site. My apologies.
- End political rant -

lula said...

Oh, do you have a cannon, Doug?

karma said...

to the left of 'em.
to the right of 'em.

the Light Brigade ne'er questioned 'em

formltuf: the lieutenant was a tough one

Doug said...

See, Pia, I thought they were preaching the canon. Silly me.

Um, Liz, you mean besides here? There actually is a contemporary on-line cynic's dictionary that I used to link to. Indie referred me to it, so maybe if he drops by he can re-enlighten me.

That's OK, Sar, although I've noticed my conservative readers are getting scarce.

Lula, you mean like the camera? It's an 8 mega-pixel.

Charge, K!

GABRIEL C. ZOLMAN said...

"Adults Only" post today. Sorry, Doug.
Edit as you see fit.

Cannon, n. See "welcome wagon." (1) A large orifice loaded with huge balls by larger arseholes who have none, and assorted throbbing Members Of Congress.
(2) The rudimentary peni of Homo Electus, most often pointed at that which it most desires to screw.

)+(

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Cannon,n., A loud thing. A dumb object for shooting off stuff. There's a loose one in the White House.

Ariella said...

Cannon, Joseph Gurney. Known as “Uncle Joe.” 1836-1926.

American politician who as Republican speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives
(1903-1911) was known for his strongly partisan and autocratic use of authority.
hmmmm
We seem to have some cannons on the hill these days.

Omnipotent Poobah said...

cannon, loose (n) - See John Bolton, Dick Cheney, Condi Rice, et al.

Andrew Donaldson said...

Cannon, n. According to the NRA, perfectly legal for personal protection.

Jamie Dawn said...

Ooooh, lots of political griping today.

Verbal Cannon: Weapon intended for mass destruction but often ends up blowing up in the face of the user. Think before you speak, and remember what you previously spoke.

Sar said...

Jamie Dawn - Ironically your definition is exactly what I was thinking about Karl Rove except you said it much better.

Sar said...

And Congrats To Pia!!! :)

(Doug - I must have a vorocious appetite today since this now marks my fourth trip to the buffet.)

Doug said...

Gabriel, I'll just respond by acknowledging that you have the right to post after your own fashion and are one nasty *&^&^#*(*&@*&^#@!!!

TLP, it's funny how I never know when the word of the day will be either sexual or political. I think this is why I'm not in advertising.

Ariella, and a lot of pea-shooters, too.

Poobah, that's a great start for a list.

Andrew, I carry one around at all times.

Thank you, Jamie Dawn. It's amazing how rarely they shoot where pointed, isn't it?

Sar, I think Jamie Dawn had someone(s) else in mind. But I'm glad we're keeping you full. Like you said, I'm all about food for fodder all the time.

Sar said...

I was pretty sure about that, Doug, that's why I said ironically.

*burp* Does this buffet include a Tums chaser?

LeesahEm. said...

I thought I would play devil's advocate and say something very right wing like "cannon-the extension of god's hand in the war against evil" but it made me gag a little just thinking it.

~Daydreamer~ said...

Cannon: What I'll be taking someday to the pharmacy where I used to work for some firework. Serious. Heeeya!

Doug said...

Sar, if you can't take the fodder stay out of the food.

Stiff upper lip, Masil.

You know, Marwa, I feel like I should be talking you out of that, but...

AP3 said...

Everyone's taken all the angles I can think of... that's what I get for arriving late!

Jamie Dawn said...

If the definition fits...

The verbal cannons are blasting away on both sides of the political aisle. Blasters & blastees beware!

actonbell said...

And now for something completely different:

I just wanted to point out that a cannon can also mean the loop at the very top of a bell which is sometimes used for hanging (the bell), or in the case of the Tsar cannon in Moscow, a huge ornamental cross--it's the world's biggest cannon.

Congrats to Pia!

Doug said...

Aral, I was saving you one last angle but Actonbell took it :P

I agree, Jamie Dawn. The rancor is good for no-one. You almost wish they'd use real cannons.

Thank God, Actonbell. I was just thanking God that Bierce didn't include "persistant vegetative state" in his dictionary.

Semisweet1 said...

Here's a picture of tsar-pushka in the wintertime. http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/7/7d/Tsar-Pushka.jpg

I got misty-eyed, Doug.

Semisweet1 said...

And here's a picture of the tsar-kolokol, which has the cannon referred to above.

http://image07.webshots.com/7/0/79/70/91207970cFXkMb_ph.jpg

Nope, I didn't take these pictures.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Well, gee, see Aral, I was lettin' you have the Cannon towel angle.

But you didn't take it.

Cannon,n Company that makes inexpensive towels.

You could also use them to wrap wounds obtained in war. Or to stuff into a Bush's mouth. Oh, whoops. Got all political again.

A Little Bar of Soap said...

I'd like to take the Holy Cannon of God and blast away this filth once and for all!

Alice: In Wonderland or Not said...

Yea I'm later. I lose.

Cannon- I'm not sure I know that word anyway.

Jamie Dawn said...

Hey Doug, Hey Alice: I said that Alice resembles singer Rebecca St. James. Check this out and see if you don't agree:

http://www.mikerimmer.co.uk/images/rebeccaStJames.jpg

I'm not nuts here, right? She could be Alice's stunt double.

Doug said...

S, those are some big guns. Beautiful pictures. They don't make bells like they useta.

TLP, the common towel is completely underused as a political metaphor. Thanks for doing what you could.

Soapy! You and your disapproval have been missed. COME THEE BACK!!!

Alice, it's like a gun only larger.

No, you're right, there's a strong resemblance. Alice is prettier, though, and probably a better writer. St. James is probably Christianier.

Fred said...

Cannon: First used during The Hundred Years' War, along with the introduction of the longbow.

This was one of the few wars France ever won. And, it took them a century to do it.

Sorry for the teaching perspective, but I came too late for the politics.

Doug said...

THat's fantastic Fred! We'll take that every time.