Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Candy

Candy, n. A confection composed of terra alba, glucose, flour and premature death.

2005 Update: An effective decoy for affection but, sadly, not for conversation.


Happy Birthday, Semisweet1, purveyor of fine chocolates. Yes, TLP, I'm sure this time.

39 comments:

Sar said...

Happy Birthday Semisweet1! Time for me to sing...

I want candy!

...bet you thought I was going to sing happy birthday. :)

karma said...

Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.

Ogden Nash has a variation on that but you won't let me post that so I'm containing myself (in a gift-wrapped box)

Have a great birthday, half-sugar!

ereqmd: online doctor on request when teeth start rotting

Semisweet1 said...

candy, n: The means to an end, but perhaps the end to means.

You get that, right, Doug?

Thank you kindly Doug and Sar and Karma.

Doug said...

Bow wow wow, Sar

Won't let you post?

Yup, S, but I'm rooting for you anyway. 34 this year, Sprout?

karma said...

you said no posting explicit stuff so i'm honouring it ;))

pia said...

candy: will probably be banned soon for; giving people sugar highs; making people fat; tasting good, and many other reasons

Semisweet1 said...

Thanks, Uncle Doug.
Yes, 34. Age is catching up with waist size.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Candy, n., Heaven in a box. The eat-by date is never later than tomorrow.

Happy birthday Semisweet.

Doug said...

Ah, thank you Karma. Nash is wholesome enough.

Pia, I'm sorry the baby boomers ever invented the stuff.

Gettin' up there, Pal.

TLP. I'd have figured you for a sweet tooth.

Alice: In Wonderland or Not said...

candy - a mish mash of simple sugars and a poisonous bribe.

happy birthy to the sweet one.

Ariella said...

Candy~ the earliest and most versatile bribe, "Use the big potty and you can have some candy."
Replaced in the hearts of many women by jewelry.

lula said...

Heaven in a box? I thought that meant something else besides candy.

Doug said...

Thanks, Alice. Bribery's just a short path to innocence.

Ariella, you seem like more of a milk-bone gal.

Lula!!!

dddragon said...

Happy Bday Semisweet!

The thought of chocolate sometimes reminds me that Milton Hershey had tickets to sail on the Titanic, but his wife got sick so they didn't go. Stayed, settled near here and founded not only a chocolate empire, but a home and school for orphans.

LeesahEm. said...

candy-the way to a girl's heart, as long as you studiously avoid mentioning what it'll do to her hips.
Happy Birthday Semisweet!

AP3 said...

Happy B-day, Semisweet!

Candy, eye, n. Katharine Hepburn.

Doug said...

Dddragon, the tragedy is that the guy who would have invented Chuckles(TM) 10 years sooner might have been on that boat. I guess we'll never know what might have been.

Masil. any guy who mentions what the candy he's just given will do to a woman's hips has been too long in the closet.

Katherine Hepburn, Aral?!? You have some nerve calling your sister refined. That's fancy.

Solace Cai said...

Wow for some reason I'm having scenes from Chocolat run through my head. And speaking of Chocolat, screw sugar, Johnny Depp is the BEST candy :)

I don't know you Semisweet1, but happy b-day anyway!

Sreekesh Menon said...

something you have, have, have and have ;yet you cant have enough....

Jamie Dawn said...

Candy: Name for a female. It works great for a little girl, but not so great for a grown woman, unless of course, she is in the porn industry. She would be advised to go by Candace, which sounds much more respectable.

AP3 said...

Doug, I almost named another Kate - Kate Winslet. Is that less fancy?

actonbell said...

CANDY: It's not just for breakfast, anymore.

If I had a kid with a bag of candy in the house, I'd be in trouble; mornings are rough, and candy would feel soooo good.

Happy birthday to semi-sweet:)

Minka said...

happy borthday Semisweet.
Now Colin Firth is a huge piece of eye-candy...I´d like to devour him!

Doug said...

Hey, Solace! and thanks. I wish you a Willy Wonka, then.

Sreekesh, you mean candy, right?

Jamie Dawn, you should absolutely write a guide to naming your baby.

Still kind of fancy, Aral, but at least I'd have thought of that example on my own.

That's funny, Actonbell. My weakness is meat not sugar, so I'd probably eat the kid.

Monika! OK, get out the utensils, I'm sending him over.

Aral, I blame you for turning today into an episode of Hot or Not. :o

actonbell said...

You have Colin Firth???? (I envy Monika's answer)

AP3 said...

I accept full credit for dragging you down to my level.

Doug said...

Actonbell, I'll see if he can schedule you too. Ekim won't mind?

Nah, Aral, you just pulled off the mask. There's more than one kind of closet.

A Little Bar of Soap said...

There is much FILTH on this blog today, Doug. There is no candy as sweet as Sweet Jesus!

dddragon said...

uh ... LBOS, are you saying that you'd like to EAT Jesus?!

karma said...

OK, what the ...!

'Candy is dandy but sex won't rot your teeth'

Mel Gibson can help keep my teeth strong and shiny

forgive me Doug!

Doug said...

Amen, Soapy

It's called THE EUCHARIST, Dddragon!

Karma, just careful you don't scratch the enamel.

weirsdo said...

I totaly agree Little Everlastingly Soapy Bar of Soap!!!!!!!
JESUS is WAY better than Colin Furth!!!!!!

~Daydreamer~ said...

Candy: That's sweets for children, nice guys for women... (or the other way round)

You didn't tell me how your Halloween went Doug? :(

AP3 said...

Wow, ~*~daydreamer~*~ looks just like eye candy/Kate Winslet!

Tan Lucy Pez said...

It's 5:30 AM on the east coast. No new post????

Okay, then I'll go with the favor of the last post: If you're sendin' out eye candy, I want Gerard Butler. Just to look at.

Doug said...

Thank you, Pansi. Soapy's been needing a friend, I think.

Ah, Marwa. It was OK, thanks. Is it Eid yet? If so, Eid Mubarak. If not, I'll see you tomorrow.

Aral, you have only but to ask.

TLP, Who?

Tan Lucy Pez said...

He was the The Phantom in the movie, Phantom of the Opera. I don't like pretty boys.

Em said...

Candy: those delicious wobbly bits conserved in my buttocks ;)

Doug said...

Me either, TLP. I thought that was Lon Chaney.

Rainbow, I always envied the people who could save some.