Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Demented
DEMENTED, adj. The melancholy mental condition of one whose arguments we are unable to answer.
2006 Update: Corruptible at too high a price. Feverishly unmoved.
I know, I know! Harry Potter *she screams at the top of her lungs*.
Dementors, who guard the prizon of Azkaban, they suck the life right out of you, buy giving you the kiss of death. Scary stuff. They float around in black robes too and that is never a good sign! Now excuse me, while I go and turn on teh lights in this house, scared myself a bit there!
"So it's sorta social, demented and sad, but social. Right?"
- Breakfast Club
Hmmm, who knew the infamous words scribed by '80s guru John Hughes would so aptly apply to my Intellectual Playground here if not The Brawl as well nearly 12 years after the fact.
Brian, it seems likely considering the company you keep.
Minka, brrr.
Quill, it's a lie but not mine. I think blogger time stamps when you start the post instead of when you publish. Some days, like today, the fauna I live with distract me while I'm typing and it takes a while before I remember I didn't finish.
Minka your comment was longer. Co-first?
Sar, that is apt.
O Ceallaigh, that reminds me of an Okie mechanic who was a great friend. He used to say "I'm perfectly sane and I have the papers to prove it."
I just had to jump in here. Just because we share and share alike does not make me distressed or demented. In fact, I would say that I am normal. Sort of, kinda, maybe. *sighs*
Demented:Finding out late in life that you are not who you thought you were.
Sassy Dewy
xo
P.S.
Just what are the benefits due a former guest? Card, watch special pen?
Bad girl indeed, Q. And here I went and suppressed my long-standing addiction to standing under the smogberry trees. I didn't want people to think I am any more demented than they already know me to be.
Demented: I was just about to type that demented was a condition of those who NEVER caught on to "the game." But, I'm not like that.
Oh! Wait! Am I like that? Naw. Not me. I'm not corruptible at any price. I am, however, feverishly unmoved. So, I'm half-demented. Not the same as half-witted. Not at all. I'm entirely witted. Or entirely unwitted. Either way, definitely not half-witted.
Harmlessly passing your time in the grassland away Only dimly aware of a certain unease in the air You better watch out There may be dogs about I've looked over Jordan and I have seen Things are not what they seem.
What do you get for pretending the danger's not real Meek and obedient you follow the leader Down well trodden corridors into the valley of steel What a surprise! A look of terminal shock in your eyes Now things are really what they seem No, this is no bad dream.
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want He makes me down to lie Through pastures green he leadeth me the silent waters by With bright knives he releaseth my soul He maketh me to hang on hooks in high places He converteth me to lamb cutlets For lo,m he hath great power and great hunger When cometh the day we lowly ones Through quiet reflection and great dedication Master the art of karate Lo, we shall rise up And then we'll make the bugger's eyes water.
Bleeding and babbling we fell on his neck with a scream Wave upon wave of DEMENTED avengers March cheerfully out of obscurity into the dream.
Have you heard the news? The dogs are dead! You better stay home And do as you're told Get out of the road if you want to grow old.
__________________
I may not make it back before Christmas... So Here is My Seasons Greetings a little early.... "Happy Holiday's my dear Doug"!!! :)~
51 comments:
I must be demented to come here everyday.
I know, I know! Harry Potter *she screams at the top of her lungs*.
Dementors, who guard the prizon of Azkaban, they suck the life right out of you, buy giving you the kiss of death. Scary stuff. They float around in black robes too and that is never a good sign! Now excuse me, while I go and turn on teh lights in this house, scared myself a bit there!
demented description used to identify any West Coast native who would actually be up and on the web earlier than Doug's post.
Whare you been? You're late!
Ha! Doug -- that posting time is a lie! I've long suspected such. This morning I saw with my own eyes!
Yes quilly, he was late and someone else was a bit too early!
*pouts*
"So it's sorta social, demented and sad, but social. Right?"
- Breakfast Club
Hmmm, who knew the infamous words scribed by '80s guru John Hughes would so aptly apply to my Intellectual Playground here if not The Brawl as well nearly 12 years after the fact.
DEMENTED, adj..
1. One who has acquired tangible evidence of having lost his mind. A Ph.D., for example.
2. A denizen of the West Coast who is up before dawn and blames it on the East Coast. See EASTERN STANDARD TRIBE.
Demented: how I feel in the mall...
it is not enough that I do my own shopping....I also do my Mother and Father's shopping.
Maybe not so demented, I am getting very nice things from them...so they are the ones that must be demented :)
Demented: logic, artistically crafted in half-baked noodles; clarity, provided by a thick fog; brilliance, cast by a cracked bulb.*
*not to be confused with the lovely glow cast by my "MUCH brighter than 60 watt" NBFF...
Brian, it seems likely considering the company you keep.
Minka, brrr.
Quill, it's a lie but not mine. I think blogger time stamps when you start the post instead of when you publish. Some days, like today, the fauna I live with distract me while I'm typing and it takes a while before I remember I didn't finish.
Minka your comment was longer. Co-first?
Sar, that is apt.
O Ceallaigh, that reminds me of an Okie mechanic who was a great friend. He used to say "I'm perfectly sane and I have the papers to prove it."
Mo'a, sounds shrewd to me.
Nice work, Puppybrose!
Actually Minka, since you missed yesterday I figured you were out riding Spa. But then I saw your comment on yesterday's word, so you were first. :)
Beautiful card you made. Thank you. (((hugs)))
Brian -- there are a couple of other clues that might lead to that diagnosis. :)
OC -- are you questioning my sanity? And I am not blaming my condition on the East Coast. My focus is much, much more narrow than that.
Mo'a -- you shop for someone else? [shudder] You deserve great gifts.
Ha! No way I can beat Brian's first comment. (Nice work, Brian! And, Doug, another real good word.)
Demented: Pushing the rock up the hill again, and again, and again.
Immediately thought of Dr. Demento.
Oooo! I know! It's a candy cane without the stripe - oh, that's DE-minted! Oops! D :P
Joel -- my fav Dr. Demento tne went something like -- oh, oh, I can't tell you here. Doug might -- and Walela would take offense. Never mind.
Being demented is a perfectly rational response to this insane world.
Oh, Quilly! I just read your little song. Bad girl. But fun. And it's better to be fun than good. Just sayin'.
Hi Doug,
I just had to jump in here. Just because we share and share alike does not make me distressed or demented. In fact, I would say that I am normal. Sort of, kinda, maybe. *sighs*
Demented:Finding out late in life that you are not who you thought you were.
Sassy Dewy
xo
P.S.
Just what are the benefits due a former guest? Card, watch special pen?
TLP -- I thought I hid that link well. You have a good eye for detail.
Bad girl indeed, Q. And here I went and suppressed my long-standing addiction to standing under the smogberry trees. I didn't want people to think I am any more demented than they already know me to be.
Funny Five, anyone?
Quill, I've noticed your attention isn't purely lexicography lately. Odd.
Al, I bet everyone will have something to say about it, which is a form of dementia itself. Try again?
Mule, Franz Kafka once wrote "Sisyphus was a bachelor." Not sure what it means, but its apt anyway.
Joel, I'm glad the man who made "Fish Heads" popular is remembered.
Good pun, Diane. I was kind of waiting for that.
Quill, we are not amused.
TLP, that was good advice for the good Ms. Quilly. I think she can use it.
Dewy, I'm not sure its normal to share, but it is blessed I'm told. Did I forget your link? Correction's due, then.
Quilly, I found it, too. I hope you hide the little gold stars better.
O Ceallaigh, nice rhyme.
Uh, well, yeah, Puppy, kinda, actually.
Demented? Oh this one is way to easy considering what I have to work with in here.
You may have noticed that next to the word "Demented" in the dictionary is a picture of the Cheesemeister and/or her bat avatar.
Demented:1) a government that still believes it's wanted, needed and can do anything they want
2) Doug manipulating his stories while on vacation
Oh, Minka, I forgot about the dementors! How could I? That reminds me, it's back to work tomorrow. Today inertia, tomorrow, dementia.
(I'm back. yay)
Oh, Minka, I forgot about the dementors! How could I? That reminds me, it's back to work tomorrow. Today inertia, tomorrow, dementia.
(I'm back. yay)
Oh, Minka, I forgot about the dementors! How could I? That reminds me, it's back to work tomorrow. Today inertia, tomorrow, dementia.
(I'm back. yay)
Oh, Minka, I forgot about the dementors! How could I? That reminds me, it's back to work tomorrow. Today inertia, tomorrow, dementia.
(I'm back. yay)
You can say that, again. Where's the little garbage can?
Doug -- My attention isn't purely lexicography lately? I have no idea what you're talking about.
[whistles innocently]
Oh, and I'll apologize for that not so hidden link as soon as I work up a little guilt.
[more whistling]
K, Doug, here goes...
Demented: the first half of my shrink's "Spa-for-your-Brain" two-step makeover.
The second half, applied immediately after: remented.
Al, is the step that lead you there - fer-mented?
Doug, I know that's not defining demented, but it may be as close as I can come right now.
Demented: I was just about to type that demented was a condition of those who NEVER caught on to "the game." But, I'm not like that.
Oh! Wait! Am I like that? Naw. Not me. I'm not corruptible at any price. I am, however, feverishly unmoved. So, I'm half-demented. Not the same as half-witted. Not at all. I'm entirely witted. Or entirely unwitted. Either way, definitely not half-witted.
Actonbell, reading "Oh Minka!" like for times in a row was a blast:) Was it good for you too? LOL
That's me to a tee!
Jenna, right, and one of the many reasons I appreciate you is I bet you didn't think of sex with werewolves.
Cheesemeister, you're on my "Demented" Successories poster, too.
Pia, talk to Goldennib and Al about that. I had nothing to do with the story and little enough with the war on terror.
Actonbell, your return deserves a five gun salute, I think. Congratulating Minka can't be overdone either.
Quilly, I do believe you're giddy,
Al, that explains how I got cemented.
G, you may be closer than you think.
TLP, you may be prevented.
Minka, this is why there're webcams.
Mike, so I hear. You still up for a guest post?
Demented: A "ment" julip in which the "ment" has been removed. (no enjoy-ment there now, is there?)
Did you have to use that word so close to the holiday?
demented: the word which should be used to describe the ancient phenomena which tries to squeeze its fat ass down my chimney every year.
Doug -- more like manic-depressive, but my dementia should level out in a couple of weeks
Harmlessly passing your time in the grassland away
Only dimly aware of a certain unease in the air
You better watch out
There may be dogs about
I've looked over Jordan and I have seen
Things are not what they seem.
What do you get for pretending the danger's not real
Meek and obedient you follow the leader
Down well trodden corridors into the valley of steel
What a surprise!
A look of terminal shock in your eyes
Now things are really what they seem
No, this is no bad dream.
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want
He makes me down to lie
Through pastures green he leadeth me the silent waters by
With bright knives he releaseth my soul
He maketh me to hang on hooks in high places
He converteth me to lamb cutlets
For lo,m he hath great power and great hunger
When cometh the day we lowly ones
Through quiet reflection and great dedication
Master the art of karate
Lo, we shall rise up
And then we'll make the bugger's eyes water.
Bleeding and babbling we fell on his neck with a scream
Wave upon wave of DEMENTED avengers
March cheerfully out of obscurity into the dream.
Have you heard the news?
The dogs are dead!
You better stay home
And do as you're told
Get out of the road if you want to grow old.
__________________
I may not make it back before Christmas... So Here is My Seasons Greetings a little early.... "Happy Holiday's my dear Doug"!!! :)~
Terry, I guess that's the wrong way to make a virgin cocktail, but a good experi-ment.
Alice, what better time?
Quill, sure looks like giddiness.
Ohhh, Shayna, welcome back and with a track from Animals. That was my album in High School
huh. I thought Blogger was demented, but it's just out of its beta. Let's see if I'm a little teapot again...
Oh, man, I'd rather have five more days off than the five gun salute. Not to sound ungrateful, or anything.
isn't it a liqeur used to make that crazy grasshopper drink? Creme de mented? xoxo
Can you believe that none of the voices in my head are demented?
Oh this is hard for bohemians, HARD I TELL YOU! All I can say is I can name names... oh yes!
But to name or not to name, now that is the question! Hmmmm.....
Hard as in hard to bite the bohemian tongue... ay on the unfinished thoughts!
And sometimes all one has to do is look up above for the answers to life's questions on dementia...
demented: lacking ment.
demented 4:25 a.m., waiting for your Wednesday post
Actonbell, short and stout becomes you.
It's also my favorite flavor at Baskin-Robbins, Mireille. You can never get it anymore.
Not really, Squaregirl.
Miz B, your restraint is always an appreciated surprise.
Cindra, having bad breath?
Sergeant Quill, I did my best.
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