Thursday, December 21, 2006

Domestic

DOMESTIC, n. A person whom one employs about the house to exercise the functions of master or mistress.
adj. Appertaining to the household, as a domestic husband, who loafs aboute the house making love to the female domestics. The domestic husband is commonly what Artemus Ward said the Prince of Wales was-"A good prpvider." That is to say, he commonly provides good looking kitchen maids.

2006 Update: adj. Locally labeled.

41 comments:

Mo'a said...

Domestic Goddess....need I say more...except...I resemble that title.

First

Brian said...

Domestic: Home Grown perverts, ie. professional ball players.

Mo'a said...

*smile* Finally another Icelander is first....Minka...Thad er alt i laegi?....trans: It's Ok?

O Ceallaigh said...

DOMESTIC, adj. Home grown. DOMESTICATED: Grown up, tamed - therefore boring and ripe to be taken advantage of. See UNDER MY THUMB, Mick. (Does not apply to southwestern pre-twentieth-century pens.)

al said...

Domestic: Just smart enough to know not to bite a had with food in it.

Love your "global economy" update, Doug.

And Mo'a -- go get 'er!

Sar said...

Domestic: The neglected policy and partner of the current administration.

QuillDancer said...

domestic let's just say it isn't an accident that the word starts with "do me".

Joel said...

Domestic: A negative qualifier for cars, wine, chocolate, and cheese.

Miz BoheMia said...

Domestic... a delusion the dear Loverboy once held on to that is no more courtesty of a non-and-never-to-be tamed nor domesticated bohemian other half.

Domestic... a cosmic joke I tell you!

Miz BoheMia said...

Oh... and to follow Quilldancer's lead (she started it mind you!!!!)...

... ahem...

... with a "stic"...

puppybrose said...

Domestic: settled and/or saddled

Anonymous said...

Domestic: what you dab on a bald head to attach a toupee.

QuillDancer said...

domestic: indigenous to the home, but not to be confused with
domesticated: reduced to the level of ordinary

OC -- 22 + 1 chuckle and 4 words

MzB -- I take no responsibility for the acts of my followers.

Doug said...

Mo'a, right down to the outdoor furniture.

Brian, I prefer "differently moral" to "pervert."

Mo'a, thanks for translating.

Or those with housestaff, OC.

Al, stir up all the trouble you want. I wear gloves.

Sar, good to have you back brawlin'

Ms. Quilly!

Joel, I had the pleasure earlier in the month at a dinner party I joined with my little brother of hearing a french woman scold her husband for passing her the French wine instead of the good stuff from California. If I'd been smart enough not to point it out, I could have missed the gallic lecture on cheese. I'll remember that if I go back.

Hermana, what was he thinking? Knows better now, doesn't he?

Nice, puppybrose.

Dome-stick. I'll write that down, Joe. I think I'm three years away.

Quill, thanks for keeping us up to date on the math and the law.

QuillDancer said...

Doug -- angelic me wants to know why you have set my name with that started exclamation point.

Anonymous said...

Gasp! And I get in trouble for just being? Douglas!

Differently moral...ahahahaha....

wait...what was the word again? The "pervert" and "do me" references have me confused.

Anonymous said...

French housemaids make good prpviders too

prpvider: a tool used by a viking dentist to open your mouth

Logophile said...

A friend gave a small poster which said my only domestic trait was that I live in a house. I think she was trying to warn my then fiance. He didn't listen.
But he seems ok with that, probably has something to do with Quilly's definition (snicker snicker).

Anonymous said...

A large pole used to render one sensible via a sharp whack to the head ( orig. dome-stick). The wetware version of rebooting a computer.

Anonymous said...

What the Bear I live with ISN'T. :-D

Brian said...

lvjkow-- Lively cow. That's the difference between a domestic gallon of milk or dog food. See Mad Cow. :)

cj said...

"She's quite domestic!" - a nice way of saying someone has a lot of time on their hands.

Anonymous said...

exercising your mistress!?! kEwL!! :~)

Anonymous said...

Together Scissors and I make up quite the domestic. He cooks and I clean and nobody's complaining...too much.

Doug said...

Quilly, angelic you should ask impish you that question.

Jenna, you should try following a plot with those lips staring back at you.

Karma, you can tell by the lace.

Logo, that's what makes a house a home.

CA, works for me every time. Happy holidays to you and Mrs. CA.

Even in winter, Terry?

Brian, I enjoy both. All three.

Merry Christmas, CJ! It's also a sure sign that someone has criminal ambitions.

You know, Karen. Talking walks and stuff.

Sounds like a home that works, G. And Tali can do the calculus.

QuillDancer said...

Doug, impish me claims bewilderment. Angelic me is concerned about her Sunday School teacher reputation.

Anonymous said...

Precisely.

Anonymous said...

Sigh.

I get grief for my nekkid couple

I get grief for my sparkly lips.

Just for that I'm not defining domestic.

Brian said...

msbrd:Ms Bored was very domestic, up until the point was made to the bum formally known as husband.

Now she looks good in stripes. :)

Minka said...

domestic:

follow my thoughts...

violence
animals
majestic
big
stick

I mean, imagine what it is like to be inside my head. Does this make sense? I think not! I need help...

oh and I also blame Quilly and Miz B for this stream of conciousness!

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Domestic: It can refer to a Goddess. See Roseanne Barr. Or to a terrible product. See Gross National P.

But who could top Quilly's "Do me" comment? Certainly not I.

Doug said...

Quill, imps usually claim bewilderment. I wasn't born this morning.

G, as I thought.

Ha, Jenna. You can define "pert" again.

Brian, I guess boredom is the warden's recruiter.

Minka, I actually did follow you. I'm not sure which of us should be frightened. I commend your self-restraint at the end, though. Could that be the first free association here?

TLP, that was GDP, right?

QuillDancer said...

Doug -- can't blame an imp for trying ...

TLP -- a Compliment from you is truly an honor.

Minka said...

self restraint is my middle name! Well, only because the world is so unobliging :)
It is really late, I should not comment when it is late.

Anonymous said...

Pert? A shampoo to get rid of dandruff. Do you have dandruff, Doug?

cindra said...

domestic-betty flippin' crocker

Anonymous said...

arsenic and old lace! didn't get the typo you maid ... err .. made?

Minka said...

uh yeah cindra...and that Martha Steward woman too.

Doug said...

Quilly, I never cast the first stone.

Minka, I bet "self-restraint" sounds pretty in German.

Jenna, that's the least of my flakinesses.

Cindra, the Quill family sure is getting raw-mouthed.

Karma, I don't see it. Maybe it's the arsenic I've been taking for my memory.

A pox on them all, hey, Minka and Cindra?

Mutha said...

Happy Holidays Doug. Enjoy!

Anonymous said...

The Cheesemeister: The Undomesticated Domestic.
With added function of Bathroom Assist for the Elderly as needed.

Bah humbug...I mean, Happy Holidays!