Thursday, July 10, 2008

Bottle

BOTTLE, n.  An oracle consulted by Panurge as to whether he should marry.  By the ancient Crapuli the bottle was worshipped as a deity, but since the great reformation the Amphoristic religion has prevailed among their descendants- that is to say, the worship of the Little Brown Jug, who, under the name of Juggernaut, is revered also by the Hindoos.

2008 Update:  A subsidiary prosthesis for the liver and tongue.

14 comments:

mireille said...

little brown jug! my alma mater v MN? "Ancient Crapuli" ... lol! Also, and finally, fbw in perfume slang means "full bottle worthy" ... could also mean Scotch, I suppose. xoxo

the amoeba said...

BOTTLE, n. Positive proof that Capitalism and Liberty are antithetical. After all, you've never heard of anything coming in a free-le, have you? I suppose an exception must be made for the Capital, where the spirits are said to flow freely, though the noted economist John Kenneth Gallingbreath would probably argue that the Capital-ists have merely been removed from the point of purchase (see taxpayer).

Ariel the Thief said...

Bottle, that slim lady with nice bottom?

Tom & Icy said...

Doug, that was just too funny.

Anonymous said...

Bottle-first thought,think i will rent ,the gods must be crazy,......now trying to boot up memory of gbs quote(s)on alcohol and political saviors....darn brain freeze or is that brain melt,maybe next time...........on a positive note..the homeland must be secure at this moment,as the feds could share 450 agents,who descended on humboldt/mendo a couple of weeks ago.......spin the bottle,wash/sac,decision making method...enjoy the day-i am crawling back under my rock,safe and cool :-)

quilly said...

Ahhh, put a cork in it!


:) hehe?

tsduff said...

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

I still have the Spanada bottle whose contents were consumed by my underaged Bear & I in 1971 alongside the creek while Misty grazed nearby... what a nice memory.

actonbell said...

It's been my experience that bottles are usually a very good thing.

Little Brown Jug was a song in my 45 collection when I was a child. I suspect the lyrics were changed--I see now that it's really more like a George Thoroughgood song.

sauerkraut said...

Ahhhh... well... isn't a bottle what Jim Croce stuck time into? Although I sometimes hear it as "if I could put a mime into a bottle..."

TLP said...

A fun thing to spin.

Doug said...

Mireille, I'll look for FBW next time I'm on a long drive.

Amoeba, little comes from a sellle either.

Nono, Ariel, that's an eye-dropper.

Icy, woof.

Hope the rock was cool, Bear. The Gods Must Be Crazy is a good example of the power of the bottle.

Quilly, the mouth on you!

That sounds nice, Quilly. What's Spanada?

Especially half-full, Actonbell.

Funny, Sauerkraut. You'd want to cork the mime-bottle.

TLP, true.

tsduff said...

Doug - last time I looked my name was not Quilly. But I'm not unhappy with the comparison, as she knows Friday Harbor, is hanging out with a very smart trumpet player, and writes quite well. Spanada is a Sangria, popular in the seventies (well before your time young man) that can, if one were to drink too much, cause a terribly upset stomach.

Cooper said...

Now replaced by the breast, filled with gin it is best.

Doug said...

Great, Terry. Now there's the early-onset alzheimer's. What's the point of being a curmudgeon if you forget who you already cussed?

Nice, Cooper. Pour me a glass, you can't go wrong, unless it's filled with silicon.