Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
Uxoriousness
UXORIOUSNESS, n. A perverted affection that has strayed to one's own wife.
2009 Update: Domestic surrender exported.
Yes, I had to look that up.
Feliz Cinqo de Mayo, amigos y amigas, extranjeros y conquistadores.
20 years married this summer and I still have a crush on my husband. He tells me the feeling is mutual. Didn't know there was a word to describe it. :)
I never dun heerd of such a werd, butt my spowse mite be suffrin' frum swine uxoriousness. It iz kind of lyke that thar pork flu, I think. Win my huzbind gitz neer a hog, he goze nutz and pampers the hog. He scrubz it uzin' fancy bubble bath, then buffs itz bod until it shines. Thin he hand feeds it and takes it too the park. Yewd think that pig was royaltee.
Uxoriousness is such a desirable condition, it hasn't been seen on television since Little Prayer on the Hous... no, wait, Little House on the Prairie. Why is that?
15 comments:
I need a pronounciation key. And affection between spouses is just wrong; D
Oops. I toast you with my Patron filled Margarita. They always help with the affection. "I love you, Man."
UXORIOUSNESS: the natural order of things. However, many husbands fight this part of their true nature. Successfully.
Happy Cinco de Mayo!
When you marry a dominatrix, you don't say "I do"; you say "Yes ma'am"
20 years married this summer and I still have a crush on my husband. He tells me the feeling is mutual. Didn't know there was a word to describe it.
:)
I never dun heerd of such a werd, butt my spowse mite be suffrin' frum swine uxoriousness. It iz kind of lyke that thar pork flu, I think. Win my huzbind gitz neer a hog, he goze nutz and pampers the hog. He scrubz it uzin' fancy bubble bath, then buffs itz bod until it shines. Thin he hand feeds it and takes it too the park. Yewd think that pig was royaltee.
Nessa, I'm inclined to agree.
TLP, I've preferred not to risk it, but you're right. It can be done.
Haha, Icy. I'll take your word for it.
Mutha, there's not only a word but a synonym: Hallmark.
JD, "Swine uxoriousness" is the funniest thing I've seen in ages. You win today.
Uxoriousness is such a desirable condition, it hasn't been seen on television since Little Prayer on the Hous... no, wait, Little House on the Prairie. Why is that?
Precondition for wedded bliss.
I have to look everything up.
Feliz Cinqo de Mayo, avaro, dueño del perro y nemesis de todos los cheesburgers!
I don't know, it just seems wrong somehow, that excessively fond or submissive part...new word for me but I must use it soon.
Happy belated Cinco de Mayo to you.
Amoeba, the Honeymooners are over.
So I hear, Weirsdo.
Because of limited vocabulary, Fred, or because the missus tells you to?
Gracias, Ariel, pero soy esclavo de perros. Los dueños aci colean.
Cooper, it's probably more of an exit criteria for you.
Ask Ekim, A-bell.
Fishtail???
Ariel, I guessed at the word. Translated from my cerebellum, the sentences read "Thank you, Ariel, but I am the slave of dogs. The Lords here wag."
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