Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Two Fables

The Snowy Egret and The Hunter

Once upon a time, a hunter came upon a snowy egret and asked it's purpose. The egret proudly explained that while it spent most of its time catching crabs and newts, its pure-white plumes were prized everywhere it went. "Sometimes, I like to soar above the cities and towns and see women of fashion with long white plumes in their hats and poets holding my plumes to paper. The poets will be mottled with black ink while my feather stays pure for the poet feels more for the stylus than for style, work or words. My feather over their own feet. Truly, I am blessed among birds. And what is your purpose?"

Moral: Every question contains an answer, and every answer holds a shell.


Two Crows in A Cornfield

Two crows sat in a cornfield one day. "Why are we here?" asked one of the other.

"We are part of a great circle," explained the second crow. "in which a farmer plants her seeds and the fertilizer she spreads leaks into the stream and kills the fish which are taken by rodents who crawl off into the cornfield where we eat them, leaving behind a second fertilizer which nourishes the weeds that drive the farmer into politics and social commentary."

The first crow raised a proud wing to salute the second. "Cursed will be the generation without ecologists."

Moral: It takes an infinity of tangents to make a single globe.

Wisdom, n. Delirium in a careful cadence.

33 comments:

The Old Mule said...

mule flag planted here

The Old Mule said...

an infinity of tangents...hm...that is poetry, Doug.

Wisdom: the ecology of experience.

the amoeba said...

WISDOM, n. A product of the human mind, said to be the distillate of age and experience. WISDOM TOOTH: a product of the human body that makes its appearance only after the mental distillery has entered full production - and that is, commonly, so distorted and misshapen that it has to be removed, often by digging and blasting.

Doug's Dad said...

An infinity of tangents . . . When you are right you are right. A little calculus, a little cynicism and you have a world view. Nice, vey nice

Mo'a said...

Great fables Doug...truth spoken through a fable.
Now that I am an Amma, do I need to have the Wisdom of age?
Well if I do, I have come to the right place to acquire such wisdom.

puppybrose said...

Wisdom ~ why is the word "dum(b)" contained in a word that signifies the presence of knowledge?

that said, i am beyond impressed by these two "birds of a feather"-esque fables. in black and white, no less -- two perfect colors for achieving every variance of tangental gray that comprises our way of thinking and/or our planet. brilliant, Doug, just brilliant!

quilly said...

wisdom n. [often pronounced we's dumb] the knowledge that proceeds failure

pia said...

I'm a bit hung up on "Cursed will be the generation without ecologists."

And your morals :)

G said...

The name alone, snowy egret, is poetry and then you just worked your magic with it. Very nice fables, both of them.

Wisdom: Often comes with age, but seldom with rage.

Doug said...

Mule, it's actually math but thanks and well done.

Amoeba, your definition of Wisdom Tooth brings back unfond memories, but I like your irony.

There you go, Pop. In repayment for siring and teaching me, a McParadigm.

Mo'a you can fake it. Plus, your grandchild will have the best dolls ever.

Thank you for the kind compliment, Neva. Can you dumb it down for me just a tad?

Perfect Bierce, Quilldancer.

Pia, should I start calling them immorals?

G, isn't that a grand name for a bird?

Kyahgirl said...

the scientist in me got all excited at that 'infinity of tangents' Doug.
well done! :-)

(going to get lots of comments from the nerds today buddy)

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Wonderful tales. Brilliant.

My wisdom teeth were pulled when I was 16. Out went the "wise" and in came the "dumb." Okay. The teeth never fully surfaced, so I was never fully wise. I was a half-wit.

A wise man's question contains half the answer. (Jewish proverb)

al said...

Thanks for brightening our Wednesdays up a little for us, Doug.

ariel said...

Doug, sometimes you are really entertaining!

Minka said...

Wow!

(excuse me while I go and polish my words a little...)

Doug said...

Kyah, I've missed the propellor squad.

TLP, the first ray of wisdom is that its better to be lucky.

Al, call it a happy accident.

Thanks, Ariel. The sun shines on every dog's tail one time or another.

Minka, I use sand.

Minka said...

OK, still wowed. Don´t worry, I´ll get over it...since I am pretty wisdomous myself. LOL

With the first one it took a while for the bullet to hit home. After that initial perplexity...brilliant. Don´t spent your life in self- idolatry, run! The dude has a gun, for crying out loud! And nice pun on FEET, too!

puppybrose said...

TLP: should i be concerned that my own wisdom teeth never came in, in the first place?

Doug: in my head (where wisdom is a shell game i constantly lose) snowy egrets + black crows = various shades of gray. and, well, according to the moral of your second fable, the globe is comprised of tangents, and, um, something something something involving tangents and gray that seemed smart when i wrote it but now... not so much.

d'uh!

actonbell said...

*clapclapclap*
Such intelligent fables rarely surface. I loved both of the morals--a shell! heh. And I'm a nonnerd who got a charge out of the second one, too:)

Of course, you know that we're really here to fart around.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Why, no Puppy. You're a whole wit, with or without wisdom teeth.

AP3 said...

Great job, Doug! Two gems in one post.

a4g said...

Wisdom, n. The distilled essence of a lifetime of observation, experience, and reflection, which is that teenagers should pull up their gaddang pants.

quilly said...

Woot! I'm a perfect curmudgeon. Just what I always wanted. Pft

verifier: gdhamit (enough said)

Doug said...

Minka, your wisdiffery is never less than amuzing.

Neva, I'm sure it was just more and better literary criticism than I'm used to. Nice, though. I'm pretty sure of that.

Thanks, Actonbell. You know, of all the great Vonnegut wisdom I've seen around lately not one person has come up with the phrase that begins "Take a flying..." Why is that?

TLP, who's whole wheat?

Thanks, Aral. Maybe I can aspire to be the King Solomon's Mines of literature.

a4g, once you've learned that you actually do know everything.

Quilly, the badge is in the mail. Don't wear it to Sunday School.

The ZenFo Pro said...

Doug, now this is wonderful! It's almost like a WA double-feature :)

actonbell said...

Oh, Doug, most guys are embarrassed that they don't have enough agility or talent to do that. And you have specifically asked for no profanity.

The Alien Guy said...

You have great wisdom and are an important link in the circular chain of life. Do you still work on cars?

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Wisdom of the day: Don't waste donuts!!!

Doug said...

Thanks, Zenfo! Popcorn's free today, bring a date.

Actonbell, I've never been embarrassed that I don't have the talent or ability to do that.

You mean dancing, Alien Guy?

TLP, thank you for that nugget and for putting it in simple terms.

tsduff said...

I love a well-rounded dog who knows his birds. Two of my very favorites - and I must concur: fables and birds go so well together.

Doug said...

Terry, crows especially. They're always wise.

ariel said...

I truly loved those two tales, maybe because this time even my simple brain could follow them, I enjoyed being able to fully enjoy them.

Doug said...

Thanks, Ariel. I'm glad.