Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Jealous
JEALOUS, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.
Jealous: Bitter gelatinous glaze made from sour grapes and/or rotten apples. Colors range from jaundiced yellow to mad-as-hell red, but most often found in various shades of green.
Jealousy, n. The feeling some people have when their spouse spends too much time blogging. Also, what you feel when you come across a blog that's better than yours. Otherwise known as blog-envy.
"And you can trust me not to think, and not to sleep around. If you dont expect too much from me, you might not be let down." From "Hey Jealousy," by the Gin Blossoms. I was just listening to it on the treadmill and thought of you. Oh and also of jelly and Jell-O, natch.
21 comments:
*giggles*
*points at everybody*
Doug, in this sensitive age I'm in I need models to follow but you're slowly getting lazier than myself...
jealous, one living in the howling heart of evil.
jealous: when I was little I thought this had something to do with jelly.
jealous,v. a mirror to low self esteem, self-deception at its best
jealous: Verlaine, London, 1873. See Rimbaud.
heh -- thanks Mutha ; )
Jealous: Bitter gelatinous glaze made from sour grapes and/or rotten apples. Colors range from jaundiced yellow to mad-as-hell red, but most often found in various shades of green.
Q: How do you eat a green monster?
A: Wait till he ripens and then eat him
have I said this before? *walks off in a daze*
rixdbkao: everyone's jealous of karma because she reigns as Verifier Queen, aooooo!
Jealous: a monster unleashed that refuses to get back on the leash or listen to reason
Jealous: Describing love wearing dark glasses.
Or as someone said: Love may be blind, but jealousy sees too much. Dunno who.
Jealousy, n. The feeling some people have when their spouse spends too much time blogging. Also, what you feel when you come across a blog that's better than yours. Otherwise known as blog-envy.
Minka, I could have been first. I just chose not to. *scowl*
Ariel, if you're looking for role models among bloggers your fate is your own fault.
Quilly, you're thinking of auto-erotic asphyxia. It's very similar.
Mutha, there has to be a good knock knock joke in that.
A see-through mirror, Minka?
Mule, does the phrase "tore down a la Rimbaud" mean anything to you?
Neva, it's sweet to the one not eating it.
Karma, Queen of Verifiers, I bet you told that wrong.
Pia, that's because it isn't at the collar end of the leash.
TLP, I know who but a gentleman never kisses and tells.
Theresa, does that have anything to do with macaroni?
Here's a try Doug -- with a little change in the sweet of choice.
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Jello
Jello who?
Jealousy
JEALOUS, adj. The state of one who is moved to conserve that which he has already lost.
Indolentio loved his ease,
To do whatever he might please.
But he was not forever still.
For nothing made him e'er so zealous,
As some one or thing that made him jealous.
Then he labored with a will.
But when you base your work on such,
You must pay twice for half as much.
Thus it is written, type or quill.
His fortune Indie might have kept;
But as it was, it came and went.
He's working for McDonald's, Bill.
- Po'boy Gates
Jealous: It's not that easy being green.
Like Veri Queen Karma, I have a feeling I've left this comment here before.
Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Jealous.
Jealous, who?
When it comes to puns, sometimes ja win, sometimes jealous.
(yeah -- that pun was as bad as this stupid cold i've been nursing for the past 4 days. oy.)
Mutha, I think we're on the road. How about "Jealous you don't have pudding?" as a last line.
Amoeba, Bierce is proud of you. Me too.
Sar, there's nothing wrong or new about envying your earlier self.
Neva, send your address. I'll have some chicken soup delivered.
"And you can trust me not to think, and not to sleep around. If you dont expect too much from me, you might not be let down."
From "Hey Jealousy," by the Gin Blossoms. I was just listening to it on the treadmill and thought of you. Oh and also of jelly and Jell-O, natch.
Jealous: How you feel when everyone has a definition for Doug's word but you.
nudging Dusty out of the way to get my head under the hand
Thanks, Julie and good of you to drop by. Those are pretty low-cal fantasies for a treadmill.
Or me, Indie. We can fake it together.
Haha, Icy. Willie has the same habit.
Actonbell, jealousy is such a passive displeasure. Try resentment next time.
Indie, it is easier to find definitions for Doug's words than you!
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