Monday, April 14, 2008

Palmistry

PALMISTRY, n. The 947th method (according to Mimbleshaw's classification) of obtaining money by false pretences. It consists in "reading character" in the wrinkles made by closing the hand. The pretence is not altogether false; character can really be read very accurately in this way, for the wrinkles in every hand submitted plainly spell the word "dupe." The imposture consists in not reading it aloud.

2008 Update: A method of locating fate in the hand and beyond the control of the fated.  Economics in a floral turban.

13 comments:

I Dive At Night said...

First!?!

Palmistry: Big lies from little lines.

(Decided not to get rude with this one... just too easy.)

Anonymous said...

I love the last part of you definition

The thing is I'm forever looking for my fate through lines

Anonymous said...

Palmistry (v) -not the place to be rude or crude-The practice of seeking the divine through the eyes of others..may be practiced as a solo reading also...Good Morning , another day in paradise here,hope the same in your part of the planet...Peace Always :-)

Anonymous said...

Well, missed out on being first;
hope my line is not the worst;
no begging forgiveness from the viscount;
when he catches me getting a 5-finger discount.

palmistry.

and meow.

TLP said...

Palmistry: A friend who tried, but missed.

Anonymous said...

Cross my palm with gold and I'll read yours. So, y'know, don't forget to write on it so I can read it.

Anonymous said...

Let's see, Quilly gets away with this sort of thing, and she's still asleep, so just maybe ...

PALM: A vegetable supplying many useful products.

MIST: A fine spray of a liquid such as water.

TRY: To make an effort.

PALMISTRY: Experimental hydroponic date farming.

"Dude! Did you say you got a date?"

Not me, dude ...

Jamie Dawn said...

Your definition is superb. It's kind of scary when someone supposedly can read the future and there's nothing we can do to change that future.
I guess if my life line is on the short side, I could alter that with the use of a razor blade.

Anonymous said...

PALMISTRY

What the bum on the street corners wants.

G said...

I thought nobody could top "economincs in a floral turban", but I see there are some pretty good attempts here.

Palmistry: street corner psychology.

Tom & Icy said...

I like pawmistry.

tsduff said...

Palmistry - A carnival staple

Doug The Una said...

Morgan, thank you. My comb thanks you, too.

Pia, Destiny doesn't come calling. Or so I've heard.

Peace to you, brother Bear.

Sauerkraut, Viscounts can be tough. I on the other hand, gladly accept fluff.

TLP, that was maybe the least obvious pun ever.

Jenn, thank you. Someone needs to tell me my phone number.

Amoeba, even now somebody is working on that.

Jamie Dawn, the secret to longevity is cutting yourself. I think.

Quilly, I thought he wanted work.

G, that's another good one. I've stood on a lot of streetcorners and seen not one person who didn't need an affordable psychologist.

Hahaha, Icy. Good girl!

Terry, you mean like funnel cakes? Sigh.