Thursday, February 26, 2009

Arsenic

ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.
"Eat arsenic? Yes, all you get,"
Consenting, he did speak up;
"'Tis better you should eat it, pet,
Than put it in my teacup."
—Joel Huck
2009 Update: A metal element used in the past to cure communicable diseases such as syphilis and egalitarianism.  Less toxic antibiotics have since been discovered as well as more lethal anti-ambitionates, rendering the preparation obsolete.

UPDATE:  Happy Birthday to Karma!

17 comments:

weirsdo said...

Yes, Bierce: Companion for old lace.
Slayer of Madame Bovary.

jenn said...

A good way for clearing out unwanted guests.

Weirsdo took mine. -pouts then reaches for the arsenic-

karma said...

one laces drinks with it, right?

Ariel the Thief said...

Arsenic, the fat of the detective story.

sauerkraut said...

dang it, karma...

word veri: reper. don't fear the reper if your karma puts everything but the lace in your drink.

Time for me to make another "blame doug" post. ...

Jamie Dawn said...

Arsenic: something I DON'T put in my sweet tea.

Headed to the airport today and back to Hickdom.
Have a good day! Chandra will be in our future again one of these days. I can't go too long without their pad thai.

:-)

Nessa said...

Arsenic: Used to get rid of pests...like husbands.

; D

quilly said...

ARSE n.
[British] slang term for ass

NIC n.
[British] slang term for stolen

ARSENIC n.
The stealing of a British butt, be it royal or not.

______

Now, Doug, before you complain about my language, please remember YOU chose the word, so just be a good boy and sip your tea and have another of those lovely almond cookies.

Tom & Icy said...

We don't use those recreational drugs

Omnipotent Poobah said...

arsenic - A potent potable often accompanied by old lace.

Al said...

Arsenic: The common ingedient found throughout Dr. Kevorkian's Cook Book.

the amoeba said...

ARSENIC, n. Formerly, an insecticide used on turfgrass. It would be applied to golf courses in the morning, and the golfers would wipe (and even lick) it off their gear in the afternoon.

Oh well. My uncle always said that maintaining a golf course would be the easiest job in the world, if there were no golfers ...

cooper said...

Don't you think the Republicans have enough ideas without you posting the cure/solution - for what they see as the biggest ailment of this country - on your blog.

Shame on you Doug.

Jim said...

Thanks for the tip, Doug. I didn't know arsenic was obsolete. Lets find a new use to make it feel better. Besides how will we poisen people if we can't get arsenic?
..

karma said...

aww dawg. thanks for not forgetting!

xxx

bidshne: glowing command

Doug said...

Yep, Weirsdo, and an unlayered Napoleon?

Now, Jenn. That's for the guests.

Karma, you scare me sometimes, but happy birthday.

The lean of the satire, Ariel?

It would make me feel better, Sauerkraut.

Very good, JD. Keep your tea pure.

Nessa, the butterfly always seemed like such a gentle insect.

MMM, cook....

Icy, you are a virtuous hound.

Some garnish, huh, Poobah?

And Jim Jones' cocktail book, Al. (Always good to hear from you.)

Amoeba, your uncle was probably right. And worthwhile as well.

Honestly, Cooper, I think they're a few ideas short these days.

Television, Jim. Probably blogging.

You're welcome, K. Hope it was grand!

Ariel the Thief said...

Happy Birthday, Karma!