ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.
"Eat arsenic? Yes, all you get,"Consenting, he did speak up;"'Tis better you should eat it, pet,Than put it in my teacup."—Joel Huck
2009 Update: A metal element used in the past to cure communicable diseases such as syphilis and egalitarianism. Less toxic antibiotics have since been discovered as well as more lethal anti-ambitionates, rendering the preparation obsolete.
UPDATE: Happy Birthday to Karma!
17 comments:
Yes, Bierce: Companion for old lace.
Slayer of Madame Bovary.
A good way for clearing out unwanted guests.
Weirsdo took mine. -pouts then reaches for the arsenic-
one laces drinks with it, right?
Arsenic, the fat of the detective story.
dang it, karma...
word veri: reper. don't fear the reper if your karma puts everything but the lace in your drink.
Time for me to make another "blame doug" post. ...
Arsenic: something I DON'T put in my sweet tea.
Headed to the airport today and back to Hickdom.
Have a good day! Chandra will be in our future again one of these days. I can't go too long without their pad thai.
:-)
Arsenic: Used to get rid of pests...like husbands.
; D
ARSE n.
[British] slang term for ass
NIC n.
[British] slang term for stolen
ARSENIC n.
The stealing of a British butt, be it royal or not.
______
Now, Doug, before you complain about my language, please remember YOU chose the word, so just be a good boy and sip your tea and have another of those lovely almond cookies.
We don't use those recreational drugs
arsenic - A potent potable often accompanied by old lace.
Arsenic: The common ingedient found throughout Dr. Kevorkian's Cook Book.
ARSENIC, n. Formerly, an insecticide used on turfgrass. It would be applied to golf courses in the morning, and the golfers would wipe (and even lick) it off their gear in the afternoon.
Oh well. My uncle always said that maintaining a golf course would be the easiest job in the world, if there were no golfers ...
Don't you think the Republicans have enough ideas without you posting the cure/solution - for what they see as the biggest ailment of this country - on your blog.
Shame on you Doug.
Thanks for the tip, Doug. I didn't know arsenic was obsolete. Lets find a new use to make it feel better. Besides how will we poisen people if we can't get arsenic?
..
aww dawg. thanks for not forgetting!
xxx
bidshne: glowing command
Yep, Weirsdo, and an unlayered Napoleon?
Now, Jenn. That's for the guests.
Karma, you scare me sometimes, but happy birthday.
The lean of the satire, Ariel?
It would make me feel better, Sauerkraut.
Very good, JD. Keep your tea pure.
Nessa, the butterfly always seemed like such a gentle insect.
MMM, cook....
Icy, you are a virtuous hound.
Some garnish, huh, Poobah?
And Jim Jones' cocktail book, Al. (Always good to hear from you.)
Amoeba, your uncle was probably right. And worthwhile as well.
Honestly, Cooper, I think they're a few ideas short these days.
Television, Jim. Probably blogging.
You're welcome, K. Hope it was grand!
Happy Birthday, Karma!
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