Monday, March 22, 2010

Occident

OCCIDENT, n. The large part of the world lying west (or east) of the Orient. It is largely inhabited by Christians, a powerful sub-tribe of the Hypocrites, whose principal industries are murder and cheating, which they are pleased to call "war" and "commerce." These, also, are the principal industries of the Orient.

2010 Update: The portion of the Northern hemisphere dominated by immigrants rather than conquerers. Among the tribes to have established homelands within the occidental region are the Indiscretes, the Patients and the Punctuals. The adjective, OCCIDENTAL, describes a native of the region, the antonym for EXOTIC.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

i am with AB on this one

Peace,may the week bring many
blessings

tsduff said...

The diatribe I endure every morning here in this very household could almost be Ambrose's definition word for word.

Nessa said...

You spelled accident wrong. Word Checker broken?

MicroFiction Monday - Sh!

actonbell said...

Sounds more like dental insurance.

TLP said...

You're right Acton. Or maybe toothpaste.

Thom said...

OCCIDENT, n Health reform passed. Democrats vs Republicans

Nancy Pelosi said...

You're right Thom. The Patients of Catastrophic Accident Insurance are now covered under the OcciDental Health Reform Act of Monday March 22nd.

quilly said...

Oh. And here I thought an occident was what occurred when the ox cart hi the barn wall.

Logophile said...

Occidental is one of my favorites streets in Seattle. Great coffee shop there (yes, this can be said of almost every street in Seattle, but so what!?).

Cooper said...

Sounds like sugar-free gum.

Occidental

Jim said...

Did you ever occidently use the bleach version of Oxydol to wash your colors?
You may be too young to appreciate this comment as Oxydol laundry soap production was stopped in the 1950's.
..

Doug said...

Bear, I kind of think AB is with you on this one.

Terry, I am not surprised.

As it happens, Nessa.

It does, doesn't it, Actonbell. Or tooth whitener.

Well, yeah, or that, TLP.

Yeah, Thom, those two parties were some kind of mistake.

Karen, that's a think disguise.

Punny, Quilly.

Logo, what worries me about Seattle is the possibility that people there caffeine up to get coffee. Is there something else you use energy for?

Cooper, apply directly to the forehead.

Not so far, Jim, but there's time.

NicoleB said...

We got what we asked for, no?
:S

Doug said...

Als wir immer sollen, nei?

weirsdo said...

Despite his having attended Occidental, Obama is still characterized as exotic by Birthers and their ilk.