Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Ode to my own sweet sister on her birthday

A sister is a creature composed
Of useful parts scented and twisted like rose-
Whenever her family's foolish or frivolous
Her voice like a wolf's whisper delivers us,
She carries us o'er muddy roads, who knows how
On shoulders like oxen's, pulling a plow,
She sees flowers bloom in the driest of gulches
Through eyes that are colored the average of mulches
No hill she can't climb, and often I wonder
Whether there's fences her legs can't carry her under.
With a mop on her head and two hammers for feet
Who can doubt it was she made the toolkit complete?

GORGONS, n. pl. Mythical sisters of ancient legend with serpentine hair and expressions that turned men to stone. That the gorgons are mythical can be proven in that they lack the additional venomous fangs, lion claws, and lethal shrieks of all attestable sisters.

Happy birthday, 'Na and you're welcome


Anonymous said...

Jenna's Dad says Happy Birthday darl'n. Love you

pia said...

Happy Birthday, Doug's sister, Jenna :)

Jim said...

Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!
Happy Birthday Jenna!

Well Jenna, and Doug too, I don't think you have read the other places all over the Internet about my birthday greeting.
This is my way of singing to you. It works really good on the Internet but this REALLY IS THE BEST I CAN SING. Many years ago I was asked to not sing anymore in a Methodist Church choir so I stopped singing all together.
You are too young remember Harpo Marx? He didn't even talk.

And Doug, you should be ashamed of even putting the word, 'gorgons' in the same sentence as nice girls, espcially like sisters.

You aren't all bad though. Your poem, in tribute to your sister is great. My sister is exactly like that too! I even got her to never smoke cigarettes (again). Seems they made her sick.
Her birthday is October 15th, I wouldn't be able to compose such a nice poem for her. I won't try.

TLP said...

Uh, You do like Jenna, right?

Happy Birthday Jenna! Doug forgot to say that you're pretty, but I know he meant to.

'na said...

Thanks for the birthday wishes and I love the ode. Thanks Dougie.

the amoeba said...

Ah, sisters. Invaluable, they are. If it weren't for them, EC Comics would never have incurred the wrath of the Comics Code, and Mad magazine would have been denied to us.

A major unending question of chemistry is, if there are cisters, how come there aren't transters? Or maybe that should be trans-sisters? No, wait, that's electronics ...

k. riggs gardner said...

Happy Birthday Jenna!

Jim, I don't know how Jenna would feel about this because it's her birthday present. But Doug probably wouldn't care if you just borrowed the poem for a day.

Ariel the Thief said...

C'mon, Doug, who do you want to fool?

Happy Birthday, Jenna!

k. riggs gardner said...

I bet Jim, the amoeba and most of the neighborhood want to borrow one of Jenna's hammer-feet right about now.

Then we'll borrow the mop and clean-up the floor.

Doug The Una said...

Dad, today's post was kind of a public service announcement.

Thanks, Pia.

Jim, in out family, Jenna's the one who gets other people to pretend to give up bad habits.

TLP, Jenna knows she's pretty. My duty as oldest brother is to make sure she knows that it isn't her superficial beauty that matters but her big mouth.

Welcome, 'Na. Have a safe flight tomorrow. Is Stevie going in the overhead bin or are you checking him? Hey, wait a minute. What's with the link?

Amoeba, actually, I think that's demographics.

Karen, no problem here but I recommend against it. Buy her a Hallmark card, Jim.

Everybody, Ariel, just like everybody else.

Karen, they are good for carpentry.

Jamie Dawn said...


A Super-Marvelous Happy B-day to your beautiful, wonderful sister, Jenna!


quilly said...

Happy Birthday, Jenna. I have brothers, too, and know what a pain they can be. Yours, however, seems particularly pesky. Step on him again.

k. riggs gardner said...

I sent these as direct messages by accident.

Actonbell. My name isn't really Jenna. My birthday isn't really until February. Thanks for the greetings, tho. Right about now, a real Hallmark card would be more creative then my eyes being the color of mulches.

Quilly: Did you mean a step or a kick in the ass?

Cooper said...

Happy birthday Doug's sister, Jenna.

venomous fangs, lion claws, and lethal shrieks - humm

You may be right on that.

Loved the sister poem, I don't have one, a sister that is, so I will take your word for it.

tsduff said...

As I am a sister (to five other siblings), I found myself jealous as I read your prose. Then, I found that I was not jealous, as my one and only brother could/would never have written such words about muah. Then, I abandoned hope altogether, because your sweet views of a sister so fond, are certainly of no relation to me. LOL!!


Doug The Una said...

Thanks, JD.

A-bell, she's expected in swatting range about 5:30.

Sound advice, Quilly.

Happy birthday well in advance, Karen.

Neither does Jenna, Coop, unless you count Andy.

Haha, Terry. You really went through a process, didn't you? Thank you on Jenna's behalf and my own.

Susan at Stony River said...

Happy Birthday Jenna and congratulations on having a brother who loves you well enough to compose poetry for your special day!

Oh, I have a tear in my eye...


Nessa said...

Happy Birthday, Jenna (make sure you give Doug a noogie for calling you a gorgon.)

javajazz said...

a sweet ode
to a sweet sister
from a sweet brother...
lucky sister...!

Doug The Una said...

Oh, that's ok, Actonbell. I didn't get swatted. I never get what I deserve.

Hey, welcome, Susan. I'm glad there was cake when you arrived.

Nessa, the top of my head's a little out of reach.

JJ, you always see the best in people who have just shown their worst. Unusual in a musician, isn't that?

Unknown said...

Oh mustn't you be the sweetest of all brothers. Such honeycoated word. I'm sure she'll love you forever after this *grin*.

Happy belated birthday, Jenna!

Doug The Una said...

Nicole, Jenna and I have a forever kind of tolerance.

Hobbes said...

Happy birthday to your sister.
If you hear any hisses from her direction, don't look over.

Stheno said...

hsssssssssssssss ........

javajazz said...

maybe i just cant read...
actually, i cant read music either,
now that i think of it....

k. riggs gardner said...

I don't know if that's true, JavaJazz. You might be Canadian, but I think you're able to read.

javajazz said...

actually, most of
a musician's seeing
probably comes
from their ears...
Karen, i'm actually
a dual citizen
of Canada and the
United States,
but regardless of all that,
i still can't read music.

k. riggs gardner said...

This is because
JJ voluntarily chose
with Canada,
land of loonies