Monday, March 09, 2009

Disease

DISEASE, n. Nature's endowment of medical schools. A liberal provision for the maintenance of undertakers. A means of supplying the worthy grave-worm with meat that is not too dry and tough for tunneling and stopping.

2009 Update: A condition of the psyche or corpus, in which function is diverted from its purpose such that a correction is required. Examples include wrinkles near the eyes, accumulation of adipose tissue near the stomach and uncertainty.

19 comments:

Tom & Icy said...

Are you sure, Willie?

Nessa said...

I can't decide how I feel about your definition.

the amoeba said...

DISEASE, n. Your happiness, prosperity, or good fortune, if I don't get a piece.

TLP said...

Disease, v. to badmouth comfort.

Jamie Dawn said...

I am diseased. I am accumulating wrinkles at the corners of my eyes, and I have an accumulation of adipose tissue in the tummy, thigh, and bohunkus regions. I fear there is no cure except possibly denying myself chocolate and carbs. That is too high a price to pay, therefore my diseased status shall remain. I shall work to see that it does not grow larger.

quilly said...

alternate pelling: EXERCISE

quilly said...

Alternate spelling: EXERCISE

quilly said...

Btw, I have feel some disease over my ability to spell.

Ariel the Thief said...

Disease, shake it.

Minka said...

disease, n. the breath of life

pia said...

Love Minka's definition. i know yours is a morning blog good with coffee but often lately I have no time until later so...

actonbell said...

Your update may define me as diseased, but I am not at all ill at ease. Nope.

Jim said...

So being old, fat, or hesitant is a disease? I don't think so, please don't speak for me.
It took me a while to decide what to say about this post, like I said on another of my blogs, 'flip a coin.'
..

tsduff said...

dis - ease. I have experienced dis-ease many times. I hope you all have developed a way or a few ways to arm yourself against such a malaise...My best cure is a bottle of Barefoot Bubbly and a sweetheart personality nearby... xo

puppybrose said...

Knock, knock

Who's there?

Disease

Disease, who?

Dis easy, dat hard.

d'oh! came here a'thinkin' i'd be clever and such, read through everyone's comments, and was reduced -- ONCE AGAIN -- to a crummy pun. or punny crumb. you decide. ; )

Doug said...

Bow wow.

Me either, Nessa. Some days, you just get through.

Take my wallet, OC. Just leave me the pictures of my dogs and my Jiffy-Lube card.

TLP, if you're well enough to pun, you're well enough to get sick.

JD, if that's sick, I don't want to be well.

Quilly, I think that's abcedetric aphasia.

Ariel, you look comfortable in the new avatar, but I recall your nose being smaller.

Minka, *rattle*

Actonbell, I have to say my definition describes you least of all.

As far as I'm concerned, Jim,old and fat are fine conditions.

Terry, use as necessary.

Ah, Neva. Good to hear from you. Whatever inspired you to check back in on the blogs?

cooper said...

"We will cure this dirty old disease
If you've got the poison I've got the remedy"
J Mraz

I had nothing else.

My captcha - pershin
wrong I'm American

Ariel the Thief said...

Doug, I recall your smelling not as dinner... but you sure give rattlesnake a new meaning.

weirsdo said...

You are on the money, RBUD. Disease and unease have become inextricably confused for us.