DISEASE, n. Nature's endowment of medical schools. A liberal provision for the maintenance of undertakers. A means of supplying the worthy grave-worm with meat that is not too dry and tough for tunneling and stopping.
2009 Update: A condition of the psyche or corpus, in which function is diverted from its purpose such that a correction is required. Examples include wrinkles near the eyes, accumulation of adipose tissue near the stomach and uncertainty.