Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Special Guest Wednesday

This week, I'm delighted to have as my guest Bookworm aka Tok'ra aka Haras Pikachu Pez. After her mother's guest appearance last week, Bookworm was asked to define Self-defense.

SELF-DEFENSE, n. Fudging the truth for your own benefits.
The first punch but not the first move.

About Bookworm aka Tok'ra aka Haras Pikachu Pez: Bookworm is the first born of Dddragon's daughters by a foot. The (comparatively) good twin has proven that the gene for hectic is dominant and is a trumpet player, shakespearean actress, international purveyor of peace, Dance Dance Revolution prodigy, Stargate fan and impending driver, God help us all. Poor Dddragon. Poor, poor Dddragon. Bookworm's appearance here marks an important point in the history of Waking Ambrose. As of now, each and every blogging Pez has now graced this site as a Wednesday Guest (except maybe one. I'll have to check.)

Bookworm, as her name suggests, is a thoughtful and curious sort. For a long time, the main feature on her blog, The Bookworm's Nook was a weekly series in which she would describe a situation from her classes and/or life, invoke a good quote by a great mind on the topic, and ask her readers for their opinions. These features always provoked an interesting discussion. At other times her site, like her sister, Goa'uld's, has been a place for video game reviews, book reviews, and a partial diary. Oh, and I'm sure she'll be delighted for me to point out that you can read about (some of) her weird habits, here. Just as a teaser, the child has a shoelace fetish.

Not surprisingly, given her lineage, Bookworm is a funny, considerate, brainy, talented and insightful young person. None of which will protect you from door dents if you park your car on the street in South-Central Pennsylvania about 6 months hence. Remember, kids, don't drill and drive.

Oh, heck! I almost forgot that today is Waking Ambrose's day to search for intelligent life.

And on Tok'ra's day, too.

How to be a future guest on this site: Just send an email to dpascover at mac dot com. On a future Wednesday, after posting that week's guest, I'll send you an email with a word to define. You'll be expected to return your definition along with a graphic representing either your definition or yourself by the following Saturday. The only rules are no profanity and no novels, please. And whatever I make up at the last minute.

I will be contacting previous guests who regularly comment here to repeat in no particular order. Previous guests who haven't been much heard from since their guest post should recontact if they would like to repeat.


dddragon said...

gotta be first!


dddragon said...


In Bookworm's Defense, I kinda "made" her do this, in order to defend Doug's Wednesday Guest spot from extinction.

Anonymous said...

Great definition! I like the exhausted looking punching bags! Purrrrfect.

Self-defense: any excuse given to my mom to NOT be punished for getting into a fight with my brother. see: tattle first so you don't get your ass paddled first.

Oooh...I'm getting closer to the toooop.

Jake said...

self-defense: n. when Chuck Norris decides to have mercy on your soul.

Anonymous said...

and thank goodness you did, Dddragon! and OF COURSE you'd have wonderfully impressive children (being so impressive and wonderful, yourself)! is there no end to the accomplishments of this dynamic family? i think not!

well done Bookworm! i love your mom & her cats and your grandmother and your aunts and i'm sure there's a whole lot more to love about your family, but this'll do for now.

whoa! did i just see Jake? dude! we missed ya! (and i'm guessing he can teach us all a thing or two about self-defense)

Sar said...

Nice Job Bookworm! I really liked your definition. You know, I noticed you said fudge(ing) - oh yes the lineage between you and your mom and grandma TLP is quite clear. Also another reason I'm convinced I'm part Pez. :)

Self-Defense: Jack Bauer's offical claim of justification following the same means of attempted survival by those subjected to his wrath.

Mistress Anna said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Mistress Anna said...

The excuse quite often used to justify war, when it actuality the reason is monetary.

G said...

Nicely done Bookworm. I went over to read up on your weird habits which reminded me to give my neck a twist, cracked to the left, not the right. Growing up in a large family, I know a thing or two about self defense.

mireille said...

I just wanted to slide in here while G cracked her neck ... to say Good Work, Bookworm! (Are those all Pezes in those sleeping bags? Is there really only one Pez who hasn't been profiled on WA? Wonder who the elusive Pez is and ... is she hiding out at the beach?) Have fun with the car, Bookworm. It's a shame how little sense of humor the state patrol has about hit and runs. Not that I know. xoxo

Doug The Una said...

Dddragon, you made her? I guess the devil makes work for idle hands is your thinking?

That's a popular strategy amond Jennas, Jenna.

Hey, Brer Jake! Welcome back to the blogosphere. How's your Arabic?

Puppybrose, I agree with all that.

Sar, I've never once heard Bookworm's grandma say "fudge." Maybe in reference to candy.

Or just a missing cup of coffee, Mistress Anna.

G, I bet you swing a bookbag like nobody's business.

Bookworm, don't listen to Mireille. At the sound of bending metal, use the accelerator.

Miz BoheMia said...

Fabulous Bookworm! I am intrigued by you I say as I am of all the fab Pezes! One funkified peoples fo sho! FO SHO! (Do not be alarmed! Bohemians have a tendency to yell you see!)

Self-defence~ I say start with a stomp on the foot, then grab the shoulders and knee the groin and finish it all off with a punch (with the bony part beneath the palm... I cannot think of the name at the moment! *sigh*) to the nose... if you are so inclined keys into the eyes are good too as is a parting kick in the kidneys! And if you have mace and a stungun on you, I say electrify the finish! ELECTRIFY IT SAY I!


Anonymous said...

Doug, Jennas need a little extra "oomph" in our back pockets when it comes to brothers.

Hm...I remember getting this piece of advice from you a few months back, MizB. There was no k-kish, k-pow, k-flatten. Probably a good thing, hm? Methinks the justice will be in him having a daughter... mwah-ha-ha-ha- ha-ha-ha. *wipes tears away* I feel better now!

But ooh the stungun! Snap! Crack! Sizzleth on the floor! That's the self-defense this little writer needs on the train. UGGGH! Get that out of my face! Off my arm! Zap! Sizzleth! Down he goes! Yeah baby yeah! Twitch you pervy man...twitch!! Oh um...pardon me. Ahem. Where was I? Self-defence=justice for me!!! Yeah baby yeah!!

Oooh Jakeness be back! Welcome back!

Kyahgirl said...

Hi Bookworm-your definition of self defense is great! Like g, growing up in a large family, self defense is a necessary skill. Its nice to meet you here. I hope my kids grow up to be as smart, accomplished and likeable as dddragon's kids.

Great job Doug and congratulations on your magnetic pull which has dragged the entire Pez Dynasty into our sphere. Not so say WA is like a black hole or anything. Just saying...I can't seem to stay away :-)

TLP said...

Great job Bookworm! The family is proud.

Acton Bell never did a guest spot, did she???? I don't think I could have missed that.

G said...

Oooh you got right to my secret weapon, not to worry, there's more in the arsenal.

Doug The Una said...

Miz B, muy gracioso. Y tu quieres leser mi mesaje a ti de ayer.

Jenna, I'm guessing there's some background about the daughter.

All but one, Kyahgirl.

TLP, I was trying to make Acton Bell feel bad at the beach.

I have no doubt, G. Poor Tali has to worry about breaking her cell phone, PDA and game boy I bet.

Anonymous said...

okay... now i'm a little scared. you shot a blog into space? there's a WA floating around up there, likely to be intercepted by who-knows-what? that's tres Star Trek, my friend. let's just hope it doesn't come back to Earth some day, having gathered/assimilated the Biercean sensibilities of the Universe. what would be our Self-Defense against that?

oh, and i'm not sure what "redundant high-powered klystron amplifiers" can do to enhance the bloggerous send off, but it sounds vewy impwessive.

Miz BoheMia said...

Si! Si lo habia leido! But can I still not be that and hit the meanies? I would never do that to you! OH FOR SHAME! NEVER! DIOS MIO & *GASPETTY GASP*! Now THAT'S how shocked I am!

By the by, you are just the sweetest olda brotha a bohemian could have! SWEET I SAY! Deliciosamente dulce! But if that means that there are many bees around where you live then 'tis best you act curmudgeony if ever I have the good luck to come and visit! *sigh* Bees make me crouch down in defeat and cry for mercy! MERCY I SAY! Oooh! perhaps my super-duper self-defence skills would be in order? Although I don't know if I would be able to jam keys into the bees' eyes! What a dilemma!

Oooh! Jenna! "It sizzleth?" "Yeah baby Yeah!"? You are getting that bohemian groove down FO SHO! Now say it with me people! FUNKIFIED!

Sweet and Salty said...

Self Defence: Activity you MUST engage in if caught at work reading blogs.

And cracking your fingers and neck is not weird. I do it all the time. (smile)

Anonymous said...


I used my self-defense skill last night with a London Drugs flyer and obliterated a fly who had been taunting me for days in my condo.

Sadly I'm going to need a lot of self-defense skills when my cousin comes back and sees what I did to her tomatoes. Her boyfriend just make kicketh my ass. Oh and the "pumpkins" (i use the term loosely because there aren't any's a balcony for crying out loud) aren't looking to well. It's not a good sign when the leaves start to spot white, is it? AAAAaaaack. Please, cousin, for the protection of your plants, stop asking me to water them.

Anonymous said...


Good job Bookworm!

Congrats Doug on sending your blog to the final frontier!

Finally...since I apparently have no capacity for creative thought today...

The necessary consequence of man's right to life is his right to self-defense. In a civilized society, force may be used only in retaliation and only against those who initiate its use. All the reasons which make the initiation of force an evil, make the retaliatory use of force a moral imperative.

Ayn Rand
1962, from The Virtue of Selfishness

Miz BoheMia said...

I meant self-defenSe! Sometimes I am just a boob! (No pun intended gracias very much!)

cdkha- coulda killed ha!

Logophile said...

Cracking things is COMPLETELY normal, I have decreed it, and thus it will be.
Well done on the guest spot, you did beautifully.
I am partial to bookworm teenagers and I am sure your driving habits will be as exemplary as your table manners (re. napkin use).

Doug The Una said...

Jiminy Christmas, I had no idea that picture was so big.

Puppybrose, prepare for a humbler announcement.

Miz B, every hive needs a queen.

Pavel, welcome and I like your definition. "Doing research" is the best defense.

Jenna, you know the fairy tale about the tailor and "seven in one blow?" I can see a Jenna Howard twist.

Joel, secular blessings on Rand and the devil's on the vigilante.

No pun taken, hermana.

Logo, park in the driveway just in case.

Of course you mean a different Karma, Brian. Ours is waiting in Nirvana.

Anonymous said...

PG-13 site!!

PG-13 site!!

PG-13 site!!

PG-13 site!!

That's my self-defense for making no comment on your comment, Douglas.

Logophile said...

Well, since I am parking on the other side of the country I am not as worried as the locals should be, oh,
and since I am here...

Jamie Dawn said...

Hooray for Bookworm! What a smart, wonderful, almost driver. Lord, help us all!! With DDD's teens on the road and my teens on the road, we are ALL in danger.

Good luck to you in all you do, Bookworm.

Enjoy your status as Queen for the Day here at Doug's Kingdom.

I hope your week is going well, Doug. We head out early tomorrow morning to visit my Great Aunt Mabel (age 92) and also pay a visit to Elvis at Graceland. It should be fun! I plan to enjoy a fried peanut butter and banana sandwich while I"m there. :)

TLP said...

Would Ambrose say that self-defense was "well armed?" In fact...I thought he did say that, but I can't find that anywhere. Must be a Doug quote. Same thing.

G said...

Doug: I am happy to say none of the above. She'll probably get her own blog before she gets any of those items.

Funny how your word is self defense, and we're punching the stuffing out of celebs in the Snark.

Doug The Una said...

An excellent defense, Jenna. Acquitted.

Logo, I just love politicians so much, it's nice to be a campaign stop.

Haha, Actonbell. Enjoy the beach. Really, I mean it.

Have a great time, Jamie Dawn and thanks. It's amazing he never figured out how to add catfish to that thing.

TLP, I kind of remember that. I think it was my definition of Non-combatant?

G, I saw that. I'd hate to be the jester at your court.

Omnipotent Poobah said...

Ooo, I like that third picture down.

I didn't know Mummenschanz was still together.

Omnipotent Poobah said...

Or are those birhgtly colored, uncircumsized...

Never mind, that's a bit much, huh? Besides, Miz B will want to chime in if I point that out.

G said...

Now that my friend, cracked me up and on that note - always go to bed happy (or at least not beating the stuffing out of anyone) - gnight. That poobah guy is funny.

Miz BoheMia said...

Refrain "from"... *sigh*

Doug The Una said...

Haha, Poobah. Thanks for your restraint.

G, he is. If you haven't been to his site, you'll love the photo-essays.

Miz B, the question on our minds is whether your kids ever talk about, say, Elmo.

Jake said...

Thank you guys for the welcome back I didn't see your comments until just now.

Lila said...

SO sorry I missed this before!!! *sigh* Great job on the summary of Haras Pickachu Pez, Doug! And awesome definition, Hara!!

Kel-Bell said...

Self Defense:

To remove the barriers around one's person.