Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Special Guest Twin

This week, my guest is my separated-at-birth twin sister, Aral Peppermint Patty Pez. AP3 was asked to define Burnout some more.

BURNOUT, n. 1. Physical or emotional exhaustion, especially as a result of masochism. 2. One who is worn out physically or emotionally, as from self-abusive scheduling. Symptoms of: a.) looking at calendar in week-long increments induces crying, fainting, or panic attacks, while looking at calendar in month-long increments induces nervous breakdowns or Swedish Fish binging; b.) definitions as Doug's guest are distinctly lacking in humor.

The AP3-DP Coincidence:
Aral's first home was the city next to the one Doug went to High School in and she went to High School in the State next to Doug's first home.
Aral was in the special forces and Doug is in special education.
Aral's a Red Sox fan and Doug likes the World Champion Chicago White Sox.
Aral dreams of bunny butts and Doug imagines with hare brains.
The average of Aral's and Doug's marriages are both gender neutral.
Aral and Doug were both born late to the crib and early to the suppertable.
Aral graduated from Cornell University and Doug was banished from there.
Aral and Doug both climbed a volcano in what they remembered as 1991.
Aral blew Strayhorn and Doug threw horned strays.
Aral's a minister and Doug's Mister Sinister.
Aral and Doug both can be traced to Herbie The Love Bug and the Nobel Prize in 6 degrees of separation.
Aral's a lesbian Unitarian vegetarian and Doug a plebian contrarian ex-agrarian.
Ms. P3 drives a bug and Brother P was born a Doug.

Surely this means something.

Last August, AP3 made her first guest appearance (click here) and was the character behind the very first fiction story on this site.

How to be a future guest on this site: Just send an email to dpascover at mac dot com. On a future Wednesday, after posting that week's guest, I'll send you an email with a word to define. You'll be expected to return your definition along with a graphic representing either your definition or yourself by the following Saturday. The only rules are no profanity and no novels, please. And whatever I make up at the last minute.

I will be contacting previous guests who regularly comment here to repeat in no particular order. Previous guests who haven't been much heard from since their guest post should recontact if they would like to repeat.


Minka said... have done it both!
Ap3, lovely definitions!
Douglas, wonderful comparisions!

And have I beena orund this blog for too long, or did this all just make sense?!

brian said...


The tracks made by SUV owners trading in for imports.


This does make sense. *shivers* I have Dawg burnout. I also am a bunny with a butt.

FelineFrisky said...

Ah, bunny - be wary waawry careful where you flash those bunny buns! I'm tracking you! lol

Burn out - what every teenager does the first thing they get a car, late on Friday night, out on the back roads. What happens in NASCAR upon winning the race.

D :P

Minka said...

I love how you managed to bring in that those socks of yours are World Champions *applauds and shakes head*
I just came back to mention that I was first, in case it might have escaped someone...I am far from burned out!

Indeterminacy said...

Way to go AP3! You will never be burnt out. Pez dispensers can be refilled indefinately.

But there does seem to be a lot of blogger-burnout going around these days. Something like a syndrom.

Sar said...


*shakes head*

That animated Pez is mesmorizing. And my fellow '80s buff and sports wife Aral ain't too shabby either. Uh, not that Aral's a fellow or buff. *attempts to remove stiletto from mouth*

Burnout: The crowd of smokers and tokers that originally sported black with white arm rock concert tee's before they became retro reissued.

Ariel the Thief said...

great guest post! I'd now like a twin, too, it looks like fun.

I agree, so many coincidence cannot be coincidence.

Ariel the Thief said...

did I mention that I was born the same day like Al Pacino? what a loss it is to him that fame and an ocean separates him from me.

Anonymous said...

i LOVE every one of the amazing and amusing Pez Pals... AP3 you completely rocked this word! oh, and whichever one of you "separated" twins was responsible for the comparisons is also brilliant! i'm still shaking my head at that Love Bug/Nobel Prize 6 Degrees of Separation post, because... *damn*. that was funny AND smart.

hmmm. come to think of it, i'm laughing so hard at the moment in utter and complete amusement i don't think i can offer up any kind of coherent definition of my own right now... but burnout is an excellent word and i hope to try my hand and/or brain at *that* later.

G said...

burnout: n, usually found sleeping in the back of Science class.

AP3: Who could deny the soothing qualites of a swedish fish binge? I know I have sought comfort there. Excellent post - always nice to read about a Pez. By the way, in my Intro To Blogging 101, Instructor Doug recommended the Pez Family as a beginning and ongoing read. Oddly, I don't know if I've passed that course, but I do enjoy it.

Kyahgirl said...

Big squeezes to the Unitarian Minister and the Mister Sinister...this was a memorable post. Very sweet and funny. So nice to see you here Aral ♥ I'm leaving here with a smile on my face!

(Although, like Minka, I'm a bit concerned that this all made sense to me.)

Burnout: speedy exit with a showy display of smoke and squeals.

CozyMama said...

welcome, great post. I featured a friend in my post too!! check her out!!

Anonymous said...

Burnout: The bunny end of a spent joint.

ps...excellent post!

TLP said...

Great post!

You left out:
TLP is Aral's birth mother and TLP is Doug's blogmama.

Burnout: Outdoor cooking.

Ariel the Thief said...

another coincidence!

mireille said...

Wow. Those similarities. Eerie. More evidence of parallel universes. xoxo

mireille said...

oh, and burnout: the continued attempt to keep a candle alight at both ends. xoxo

The Village Idiot said...

burnout: Oliver Stone

FirstNations said...

that cracked me up, y'all!

but that yawning pez thing is playing with my brain.

Anonymous said...

Allow me to add to the building roar of praise...Fantastic post all around!!

Given my own current condition - stage four burnout - I am reduced to offering up one of the most oft used lyrical phrases in rock ballad history...

"'s better to burnout than to fade away."

yeah, right.

G said...

My my hey hey...

Anonymous said... the way...feeling very left out of the avatar loop here...have the look of an outsider, or maybe just a rebel...yeah, that's it...a rebel who doesn't need no stinking avatar (he says scrambling to find the instructions for how to join the avatar parade).

Doug said...

Minka, there's no cure. Thanks, though. And may I point out that you were first?

Brian, looks like you meet the standards for both sites.

Diane, you're right to keep an eye on that one. Hes a hopper.

Minka, it's starting to look like I need to really gloat a lot for the next month.

Indie, there sure does. I think a lot of us who have been doing this much more than a year are getting a little weary. Exception: Minka.

Sar, why am I not to surprised you'd find an 80's angle. Too bad I used this word up on Aral.

Ariel, poor cousin Al could maybe find you and complete his life if you were to, say, start a blog. What year was there was that.

Puppybrose, the Pezes are a pretty amazing clan. I'm proud to have been adopted.

G, that's why I call this the Pezosphere. Don't leave out us doodlers.

Kyahgirl, it's a special kind of sense here. Absence, maybe.

Jodes, I'm sure your friend is special too.

Haha, Mule. I'm sure I have no idea what you're referring to.

TLP, that's because I knew you'd step up and claim us both again. Although I've heard Aral is actually the milkmaid's.

Conspiracy, Ariel. That one's a conspiracy.

Mireille, I think I can speak for both Aral and I that nothing's parallel in our universe. And you just need a longer wick.

First Nations,'

Village Idiot, why do you think they call him that.

Have you seen Mick Jagger lately, Joel? You add the avatar in your blogger profile by linking to a photo on another server. I'm feeling "dog."

Anonymous said...

evewy time i twy to come up with something for this word i feew so tiowed. sigh. the ideas keep coming and going and going and coming... and always too soon.

i need a west.

Mistress Anna said...

Doug I swear you are reading my mind this week.
Burn-out (noun): The shrivelled mass of human remains left over after years of having your mind, body and soul vacuumed by corpororate employment.

brian said...


Twitching nose vacant stare
pulsing light computer glare
try to think will they care
no new posts pull my hair
perhaps go hopping bare
that's a believable dare
after all it's only fair
Feline and Bunny are a pair.

a4g said...

Burnout, n. That state of extreme... oh, nevermind.

The amoeba said...


1. What you're supposed to do to get the gum out.

2. What you're NOT supposed to do once it's gone. See [Life in the] FAST LANE [ah ha].

3. What happens in Boston when baseball owners refuse to study history. See CURSE OF THE PEDRINO. Only 84 more years ...

Ariel the Thief said...

OC, I think ladies cannot understand your first two definitions?

TLP said...

Burnout: One way to remove ticks from a dog?

'Course, I wouldn't do that to YOU.

funkyudu: (a gift from the gods as a word verifier!)
Funky you dog you.

Anonymous said...

Burnout? This never happens to me. Ever.

Man I need a nap. I'm exhausted.

Logophile said...

Wow, I am officially a burn out, and I never even got to do any weed.
I feel gyped.

Doug said...

Puppybrose, it's twoo. It's twoo.

Anna, maybe a change of scenery will help.

Brian, fair is rare.

Whatever, a4g.

O Ceallaigh, Pedro's still one of the best pitchers in baseball, but I've never made up my mind if that was as big a mistake as I agree it looks.

Ariel, you got the third one?

TLP, a fire is always good.

Jenna, it's only burnout if you got up first.

It's not too late, Logo.

The amoeba said...

Perhaps this will help, ariel? I figured this definition needed a little car talk. With some classic rock on the radio.

("Classic rock". Jeez. Makes me feel old.)

The Village Idiot said...

This is a bit late but Joel, I thought one of the most oft used rock & roll expressions was..."you just turn it up to 11"

Lila said...

Hi everyone! I was too burnt out to get here until now.

FirstNations said...

hey you ap3...i'm diggin ya.
i think you're grooooooooooovy.
no lie - you're a unitarian minister? that rox out loud!!!!

dddragon said...

Burnout: me, too.

Charlene Amsden said...

burn out my 4th of July version of what other folks call a cook out
see also: cremation

Trival Pursuit now has a new rule: If there are $50.00 worth of t-bone steaks on the grill, the cook cannot play.

Anonymous said...

That was great.

Alana said...

Nice job AP3!

You've got me convinced that you are indeed twins...quite compelling evidence Doug!

Doug said...

O Ceallaigh, you whippersnappers and your rock n' roll.

Village Idiot, if I'd spent 3 seconds thinking ahead I would have seen that coming. Spïnal Täp.

Ap3, you're not to burnt out to warm up the joint.

First Nations, Aral rox the hizzouse.

Dddragon, I think it runs in our family.

Quilldancer, that's probably a real good rule. Is that why you're divorced?

Thanks, Alice.

Square Girl, four out of five ABA consultants agree.

Charlene Amsden said...

Doug -- no, actually, it was a ladies only gathering when I burnt the steaks. The Pastor's wife was there or I am certain I would have been lynched. Had my ex- been there the steaks would have been cooked to perfection -- he was an excellent cook.

I am divorced because one morning at 7 a.m., after 14 years of marriage, I joined my husband at the breakfast table -- me with my coffee, he with his first beer of the day -- and I told him he needed to make a choice, me or alcohol. He chose.

Anonymous said...

OC, I don't trust a story that says thing like "brutally handsome". carburators don't lie.


Anonymous said...

I hope this topick choyce is not a clumsy attemt to insinnuate some thing about MY SUPER STAR DOM!!!!!!!!

Charlene Amsden said...

I finally finished clicking on all the links and reading everything associated with today's post, and all of it was supurb. There are far too many excellent blogs and bloggers out there. I don't have time to read them all!

Doug said...

Quilldancer, sorry. He chose badly.

Ariel, the man feels old for listening to The Eagles, don't make him feel poor for having a carburator too.

Pansi, you're still as fresh as new yogurt.

No one does, Quill, but it's nice to meet them isn't it?

Charlene Amsden said...

Doug -- he made the perfect choice for me. Divorce isn't a place I would have willingly gone, but it turned out to be a door to a whole new world. It opened to college, to children's ministries, to a new city -- and self-esteem. Seeped in all that alcohol was is wonderful man, and the nicest thing he ever did for me was leave.

Ariel the Thief said...

Doug, now that brings that song into my mind, it says something about old engines are started with choke.

Ariel the Thief said...

well, Quilldancer, don't they say in vino veritas? :)