Versity Training

Some rhyme, some meter, perhaps a point

And then our jests we must anoint-

Behold, a new authority,

Listen, now, at last, to me:

A misty forest's just the place

To wander in a state of grace,

Where death and lilies wander 'bout

On paws and metaphors for doubt

Where love and thorns and meadows nourish

The Condors, tribes and pegasi who flourish

In the oft trod land of plaintive verses

Or funny rhymes and snores and worstest.

VERSIFIER, n. A diligent babbler. High mukmuk and secretary-treasurer to the Glossolallians.

Advice to my mother, after her birthday

No one would get appendicitis

Without vestigial organs still inside us.

A century since cart and dray

Horses still kick folks for play.

Abaci defy our youth,

Fifty years since such were couth,

Though Terpsichore no longer touches,

Dancers hobble on on crutches.

I guess that what I'm trying to say

Is relics still may rule the day.

VESTIGE, n. The looming tyrant of an earlier age.

Vote

VOTE, n. The instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.

2009 Update: The franchise by which citizens choose between prosecution and burglary.

Californians, do remember to cast your ballot today. There's almost $200 apiece at stake, so it's like working twice.

In Re The Environment

Yesterday I crossed the high Sierra.

The changes there would really scare ya:

Glaciers gone, Pines grown thin,

The only chill ran down my skin.

I've got no answer, though I meant to-

Is it just too close to Sacramento?

VAPOR, n. The substance of matter, a matter of substance.

The Mirror

Episode 16 of The Meditations of Diogenes The Cynic.

To hear the story, listen for the echo.


This week, in The Prattler, "Lamenting Alberto."








To read the story, clique with Alexander and Diogenes.

Victory's Cave

Episode 4 of The Meditations of Diogenes The Cynic. The voice should sound familiar.

To hear the story, listen for Diogenes to philosophize.



This week, in The Prattler, "Polar Bears."




To read the story, dance with Victory.

Virtues

VIRTUES, n. pl. Certain abstentions.

2007 Update: Sobriety at dawn, gravity at noon and diligence in the dark of night. The qualities of spirit characterizing a successful thief or a fallen priest.

Rabbit, rabbit. Gorilla, gorilla. Happy New Year.

Vituperation

VITUPERATION, n. Satire, as understood by dunces and all such as suffer from an impediment in their wit.

2006 Update: The howling and scolding and prophesy of divine wrath unleashed by the good yoeman against a nearby squirrel upon payment of taxes or the receipt of new law.

Today's word is co-sponsored by TLP Psychiatry. "In your time of greatest need, one thin dime is all you'll cede. You're ugly, too."

Valor

VALOR, n. A soldierly compound of vanity, duty and the gambler's hope.

"Why have you halted?" roared the commander of a division and Chickamauga, who had ordered a charge; "move forward, sir, at once."

"General," said the commander of the delinquent brigade, "I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy."

2006 Update: The fortitude of the resigned.

Vanity

Vanity, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.

They say that hens do cackle loudest when
There's nothing vital in the eggs they've laid;
And there are hens, professing to have made
A study of mankind, who say that men
Whose business 'tis to drive the tongue or pen
Make the most clamorous fanfaronade
O'er their most worthless work; and I'm afraid
They're not entirely different from the hen.
Lo! the drum-major in his coat of gold,
His blazing breeches and high-towering cap --
Imperiously pompous, grandly bold,
Grim, resolute, an awe-inspiring chap!
Who'd think this gorgeous creature's only virtue
Is that in battle he will never hurt you?
-Hannibal Hunsiker

2006 Update: 1. The love that doth purge.
2. Creating a website to hold the contents of your weblog.

1001 Points of Light

Story #26 A tale of progress from Iran.

To hear the story, click on Scheherezade. (Right)










To read the story, click on Ali Baba. (Left)

Star Peak

Story #15, in which Doug's gas runs out but his luck holds steady.
To hear the story, climb Star Peak.









To read the story, follow me.



Today's story is cross-posted on Doug Drones On where Daisy of The Pansi Files tells her own story.