Friday, August 26, 2005

Economy

Economy, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford.

2005 Update: The process of mining, manufacture and marketing vices in exchange for the satisfaction of our own.

31 comments:

pia said...

Doug you covered everything in your definition, however

The act of buying a way too large house with every avaliable gadget, including but not limited to a home theatre with giant plasma Tv via an adjustable rate mortgage because the interest was so cheapr

Minka said...

"The state of a country or region in terms of the production and consumption of goods and services..."

Which means: America = very good economy

Anonymous said...

Economy:
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the band, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.

Semisweet1 said...

Economy: A topic talked about ad nauseam by experts, who hope to mask their ignorance of the subject by their authoritativeness. Synonym: Love

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Anonymous, I dunno why you are, because you should be proud of that one.

Economy, n. from the original Bull Sh*t
Movement in cycles, or running around in circles.

Semisweet1 said...

Dear Anonymous,

I didn't understand the technical mumbo-jumbo, but your tone was so deliciously cynical, that I had to smile.

AP3 said...

I hate capitalism.

Doug said...

Pia, that sounds so good.

Not to worry, Monika. We start our diet Monday (previous comment notwithstanding.)

OK, anonymous, so it's about maximizing utility for the people?

Semisweet1, The synonym cracked me up. I like the picture. You must be very feminine.

Tan Lucy, in Hutu that's spelled "blwaa."

Aral, I thought you said "cannibalism."

AP3 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
AP3 said...

I'm not fond of cannibalism either, for the record.

Tom & Icy said...

an adipose steak

karma said...

the less said, the better

Sar said...

Anonymous - wow, you just upped the awe factor with that one!

Economy: It isn't the sum you get, it's how much you can buy with it, that's the important thing; and it's that that tells whether your wages are high in fact or only high in name. - Mark Twain

Doug said...

AP3, I wish you freedom from both.

Icy! Yum! Good dog!

Excellent economy, Karma.

Sar, one of my favorite scenes in any of Twain's novels is the conversation in the Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court between the yankee and the ramblers over wages and prices 900 years later. When they find out how much workers earn in the future they're amazed and when they find out that everything costs that much more they keep responding that it would be worth it! A small price to pay for such princely wage!

Semisweet1 said...

I don't know whether "a picture is worth a thousand words" or "don't judge a book by its cover" is appropriate here. But let me leave you with this couplet:

If truth is ever likely to appear,
It will within the Ambrose blogosphere.

Semisweet1 said...

Economy: The system in which blogging and wage-earning are interchangeable.

Alice: In Wonderland or Not said...

I'm leaving for the city so I can't think real well this morning but
economy: the state of financial soundness often manipulated by big business and speculative markets.

Sar said...

Doug, that's exactly where the quote stems from -- I'm impressed!

It's all relative. Remember when a McDonald's hamburger was 59 cents but if you splurged for the cheese, it was a whopping 69 cents? I guess economy keeps close company with inflation.

Doug said...

Hahahaha, Semisweet! OK, ok I'll get back to work now. You're a poet and your feet show it because they're Longfellows.

Alice, just watch your step.

That's funny, Sar. That's exactly the McDonald's price that I remember.

a4g said...

Economy, n. Any system of production and distribution and consumption, the fickle cycles of which determine the daily bread of the working man. The wealthy always eat well, as they eschew Economy in favor of First Class.

actonbell said...

The only thing that can console one for being poor is extravagance. ~Oscar Wilde

economy: I don't get it.

GABRIEL C. ZOLMAN said...

Economy, n. Mutual masturbation, minus the happy ending.

)+(

Doug said...

a4g, elegant. I like it.

Actonbell, that is a fantastic quote I've never heard before. Wilde was completely brilliant and refreshingly cynical.

Gabriel, you prove to me every day that just because it's wrong doesn't mean it's not true.

a4g said...

Now Doug, I left you the opening to comment on how the wealthy always eschew in Blahniks, but you left it on the table.

Doug said...

a4g, I'm not real good at puns and I had to google to find out what a Blahnik was. Well done, sir. It's well and truly yours.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

From what we are all saying, it is apparent that a skin-flint is a public benefactor. Since he buys little, he increases our buying power. But some of us must continue running around in circles buying useless items and selling useless items so that the economy rolls along -- driving out the meaningful work.

Sorry. I got serious there for a minute. It will happen on your blog from time to time, 'cause you know, there's no such thing as a free lunch.

Jamie Dawn said...

Economy: A super-duper complicated subject that no one reallly knows much about. Talking Heads on the news know even less than I do.

weirsdo said...

To follow up on Jamie and digress a bit, here's one from my grandfather: Economics: The study of theories and why they don't work.

Doug said...

TLP, thanks for reminding me to wipe that fatuous grin off my face every now and again.

Jamie Dawn, I got my degree in economics and in the process went from a saver to borrower. Expertise is a little knowledge exaggerated.

OK, Weirsdo, we'll be serious a minute. When I was taking intermediate macroeconomics I noticed that every important theory was developed to explain the failure of its predecessor. I agree with Daddy Wiersdo.

Fred said...

Since I teach economics some years, I'll save this for the class when we define the economy. I wonder how it'll go over...

Doug said...

Fred, I'll be honored. Having read about the lives of the great economists, I do feel worthy of inclusion.