Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Monday, September 19, 2005
Poker
Poker, n. A game said to be played with cards for some purpose to this lexicographer unknown. 2005 Update: The fairest form of commerce in which fortune favors the wicked rather than his or her grandchild.
poker, a game loved by man and hated by many women everywhere: a) it takes attention away from us b) another excuse where your husband spends an entire night away while you bring the kids to bed c) we don´t know the rules (I am starting to think that boys get taken aside in kindergarden and some teacher introducesa this game of deceit and lying)
Coincidentally, I learned this game last night. My boyfriend taught me (the previous night he came home from a poker night with 12.000 Kr and I thought that this game is something I would like to learn - and it just made me furious. Especaiily when I fault, he smiles, takes all my money and does not tell my what was in his hand. It is really annoying.
Wow, Masil, Arty new icon. You left out love and industry and religion and education and journalism and blogging.
Aral, where would you get enemies?
Monika, you have to understand that now that we no longer hunt for all our food, men need some means, daring and dangerous, to provide extras for the women we love and have a cigar.
Doug, I forget who said it... but I once read a quotation something like, "Show me a person with no enemies, and I'll show you someone who has never taken a stand."
sorry to break this chain of very witty thoughts, but I need some technical assistance. Seeing that you´ve changed your profile picture a few times within the last days...I am trying to change mine and I am at a loss. It does not appear on my website, but if you click "View my profile", there the right picture is. What am I missing??? Sorry again!
Yeah, Dddragon! Weird that you can have a lead pipe in the library but no poker in the fire place. British murderers really overcomplicate things, I say.
Sure Aral, but whoever said that didn't know you.
Monika, don't fret. It can be fixed. Queen of Spades in the hole.
Sreekesh, I think you put your finger on why so many women hate their men to play poker. It's the only time we're rewarded for not showing our feelings.
Boy, everyone's talkin' about everything but poker here.
I came back to see why men like it so much. I think what you said about "It's the only time we're rewarded for not showing our feelings." is it! You guys!
I view card games as something to do with my hands while I'm talking.
34 comments:
Carribean Stud is my game of choice. In poker too. ;)
Poker, n, thought to be from the old Pig in a Poke. but possibly from Snowballs chance in hell.
A game of cards which should not be played until one has learned to cheat.
A game so universally loved by husbands so as to be assumed evil by wives.
it could strip you of your dignity
vusyzzhd: why you sleepy when you have a good hand?
Poker,n. The person next to you in bed whose job it is to wake you up in a timely fashion.
I'm still laughing, Sar.
TLP, it's good to have a few saps at the table.
Karma, I didn't guess that strip poker would come up but if I had I'd have guessed who'd bring it up. No problem.
Alice, you know you're asking for it right?
How did I not know this would get racy?
poker-one of the few legal forms of recreation where lying and cheating are expected, another being politics.
Poker, a face I put on around enemies.
poker, a game loved by man and hated by many women everywhere:
a) it takes attention away from us
b) another excuse where your husband spends an entire night away while you bring the kids to bed
c) we don´t know the rules (I am starting to think that boys get taken aside in kindergarden and some teacher introducesa this game of deceit and lying)
Coincidentally, I learned this game last night. My boyfriend taught me (the previous night he came home from a poker night with 12.000 Kr and I thought that this game is something I would like to learn - and it just made me furious. Especaiily when I fault, he smiles, takes all my money and does not tell my what was in his hand. It is really annoying.
Wow, Masil, Arty new icon. You left out love and industry and religion and education and journalism and blogging.
Aral, where would you get enemies?
Monika, you have to understand that now that we no longer hunt for all our food, men need some means, daring and dangerous, to provide extras for the women we love and have a cigar.
Poker, n.: a weapon conveniently found near the fireplace, but not in Clue.
Doug, I forget who said it... but I once read a quotation something like, "Show me a person with no enemies, and I'll show you someone who has never taken a stand."
sorry to break this chain of very witty thoughts, but I need some technical assistance.
Seeing that you´ve changed your profile picture a few times within the last days...I am trying to change mine and I am at a loss. It does not appear on my website, but if you click "View my profile", there the right picture is. What am I missing???
Sorry again!
see, it even appears here in the comment section, just not on my blog itself...me and technology!
an excersice for your emotions.
uhhh...it worked!
You really should get a verifier- just for my interruptions!
Gosh, how could I forget love AND religion.
Yeah, Dddragon! Weird that you can have a lead pipe in the library but no poker in the fire place. British murderers really overcomplicate things, I say.
Sure Aral, but whoever said that didn't know you.
Monika, don't fret. It can be fixed. Queen of Spades in the hole.
Sreekesh, I think you put your finger on why so many women hate their men to play poker. It's the only time we're rewarded for not showing our feelings.
Dunno, Masil, you must not think of them often.
I did NOT fret! I was slightly puzzled...
Monika, I hope you'll forgive my presumptiousness. Budgie's a notoriously nervous creatures.
When we get a good hand, we can't help but wag our tales and give away our bluff!
I'll be in Vegas next month; I hope one of my hands looks like the picture!
Mo, of the Three Stooges, is the poker.
Icy, why do I feel like you've written that somewhere else. Maybe on your blog?
Fred, don't be too sure. Do you recognize aces over eights?
Nyuk, nyuk Jamie Dawn.
Hey, we originated from Australia, yet we survive here in Iceland. We can take a lot of heat, or cold for that matter!
Boy, everyone's talkin' about everything but poker here.
I came back to see why men like it so much. I think what you said about "It's the only time we're rewarded for not showing our feelings." is it!
You guys!
I view card games as something to do with my hands while I'm talking.
Wow, I bet budgies make great detectives with that kind of toughness.
Actonbell, she did good, though, didn't she?
TLP, Please feel welcome at any of my games.
may i post an "adults only" comment? (just delete it if u think it's not proper)
blue four! blue four!!!!
ah!!!!
a muffled scream from the bedroom.
that's what marriage life with an online poker player is made of.
Fist of all I seriously meant it as someone who slepts beside you and then pokes you in the arm in the morning to get you up.
So there. It was way too early in the morning for me to be racy.
Asian Smiles, that seems funny and appropriate. Maybe I don't get it. I assume blue 4 is something I'd get if I played online.
Of course, Alice. Like a valet or something.
blue four is 4-diamonds.
:D
Poker: Because real men can't play bridge.
Asiansmiles, I'd never heard of that and I've been playing poker almost thirty years.
Weirsdo, we do play Bid Whist and Eucher. Bridge is for people playing with the standard deck.
Veej, we all plagiarize Alice now and again. Welcome to the site.
you're right. online the color of the cards are blue (diamonds), red (hearts), green (clubs) and black (spades). i think.
thirty years? if ever you decide to play poker online, i'll connect you to my husband. (just please don't tell him about the 'blue four'-lol)
good morning and see you at the tables.
DIAMONS ARE RED! Good evening.
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