Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Fatigue
FATIGUE, n. The condition of a philosopher after having considered human wisdom and virtue.
2006 Update: The substance of things intended, the evidence of things undone.
41 comments:
Anonymous
said...
i'm so tiowed... i need a west...(were we *not* just talking about this yesterday??)
too fatigued to be clever. (by golly, this could have been 3D's word... i'm guessin' she's used it on more than one occasion! perhaps teh Penguin is feeling a bit fatigued herself these days?)
i am laughing and laughing and laughing!! for i was too fatigued (and hasty in my desire to be first?) to notice your clever multiple/fatiguedriven (i'm guessing) postings!
fatigues. I like fatigues. There's just something about a guy in fatigues. Perhaps that's why I had Barbie date G.I. Joe instead of Ken. Well that and Joe had guns and tanks and super cool gadgets. Oh yeah...Go Joe.
5 posts? Now if I didn't know any better, I'd say you did this to yank our collective chains, Doug. But I suspect the last thing you'd do while stuck in conference purgatory is create more work for yourself here, plus Blogger has been buggy.
Still, I'm fatigued trying to figure out which post to comment on. Good thing I have my Hazelnut coffee with lateeda (read 2%) milk from Panera Bread and my golden raisin scone to fend off this fatigue.
Puppybrose, I had no idea, either. When I left to walk my sister's dog I thought I still hadn't posted successfully. When I started deleting the others I got the same "page won't load" message I was getting posting before I left. So now I think I'll just pretend I meant to use five of the same post to illustrate "fatigue."
Jenna, Barbie was G.I. Joe's beard.
Sar, I sure wish I'd been trying to be clever. Funny verifier.
Brian, I sure won't catch it on person. Jaundice is more my aspiration.
fatigue: The feeling that overwhelms me when the clock strikes 6:00 am and my smallest child summons me to get my lazy butt out of bed and start our day together!
I, too, did a double take! LOL, seems fitting, though. Fatigue: a completely drained feeling that cannot be relieved by rest. Most unclmfortable. Diane
Just looking at this multiple post and trying to figure out where to comment has left me exhausted. Generally when I'm fatigued, there's plenty of evidence of things done, not left undone. OH! Wait! Sure! A dog could be fatigued undoing stuff like the flower bed, the trash cans, etc.
It's amazing how different the world can look through the filter of fatigue.
The sun becomes a blinding, burning, headache producing circle of hate...that first cup of coffee becomes pure necessity instead of pure pleasure...a hang nail, a stubbed toe elicit screams for the paramedics...you believe with all your heart that the slow driver in the fast lane is there to annoy and infuriate you...only you...and for no good reason you find yourself rambling on and on, only semi-coherently, in spaces reserved for short, witty quip-like responses.
Oooh! I second Jenna fo sho! Me like fatigues! Forget guys though... I like them on ME with the right tough-girl-yet-hinting-on-sexy accesories... sizzlin'!
Barbie? I kinda was done with Barbie (or perhaps they were taken away, I am too fatigued to remember) after I learned that all I could do was cut the hair of all the Barbies and as for Ken, they got it on... oh yeah! Perverts R' Us fo sho!
Lil' Mischief is an expert at causing much fatigue in this household. I am tired just thinking about this damn word. I am going back to bed. I am done, DONE!
I actually wasn't a big Barbie girl. I had more fun with the G.I. Joes. Err, aah, hmm. Anyway...I quickly tired of the plastic doll after I "oops" ripped her leg off and the dog used it for a chew toy. No one gave me another Barbie. Well, after I dyed her hair purple with Kool-Aid and gave her a make-over with Sharpie's. Apparently Barbie wasn't ho-ish enough. I caused my mom fatigue...a lot.
The woman at causes me much fatigue. And ire. And the need to kill. But mostly...fatigue because I didn't think it was possible for anyone to be this stupid...and yet...here we are...a company of fatigued employees because of one dumb chick. I think her brain has been fatigued to death.
According to the NIH, *brightly* there are ways you can reduce fatigue: *Get adequate, regular, and consistent amounts of sleep each night. *Eat a healthy, well-balanced diet and drink plenty of water. *Exercise regularly. *Learn better ways to relax. Try yoga or meditation. *Maintain a reasonable work and personal schedule. *Change your stressful circumstances, if possible. For example, switch jobs, take a vacation, and deal directly with problems in a relationship. *Take a multivitamin. Talk to your doctor about what is best for you. *Avoid alcohol, nicotine, and drug use."
Please comment on how many of these apply to you, Doug. Thanks so much.
Doug, I know it wasn't intended but your post(s) is/are hilarious today. And, despite yourself you gave a brilliant example of the definition of the day!
The multiple posts are the substance of what you intended, and the blogger screw-ups evidence of one thing undone-that is, switching to another blogging platform.
Are you fatigued with Blogger yet?
And by the way, hats off to houseguests who walk the dog! You sister must be so happy to have you there (besides, of course, being able to bask in your charm) :-)
i should have said earlier (at least in *one* of my earlier comments on *one* of your earlier posts):
Fatigue: a state of mind in which one is easily amused and/or amused by repetition and/or is repetitive. or is that redundant? (too fatigued to know/care)
(seriously? i think you should have kept quiet about blogger's bugaboo-boo, 'cuz this was a seriously funny post. seriously.)
I see you used a scripture from the Holy Bible as the basis for your definition. Bless you, my son.
Fatigue: My poor, old doggie, Simba is constantly in this state. She used to have some pep in her, but the old girl just lays around and ocassionally lifts her head to acknowledge my presence, then quickly goes back to her slumber. She needs some caffeine, I think.
Anomie, you've been buying furniture, haven't you?
Jenna, you've seen The Pansifiles, right? Hoeish enough Barbie's yonder.
O Ceallaigh, I'm wise enough in that regard. Safe travels.
Brian, you may have a hip too many.
Will someone please put something stinky under G's nose?
I can't, Lammy. I...just...what were we talking about?
Mireille, I use curmudgeon yoga. You may know it as cussing.
Kyah, I want a typepad.
Puppybrose, I tried not to delete the one you left that one. Very good. Sometimes the world plots against you on your own behalf.
Brian, how about the tired blogging nobody?
Ariel, if Lammy were right she wouldn't be Xxx.
Stinkier, people, get G something stinkier!
You know Jamie Dawn, I was going to put the quote from Hebrews below today's post just because I think you can maybe go to hell for plagiarizing Apostles but I bet myself that you'd recognize it and wanted to see. Now I'll go to hell for your affection. And I find cow's blood is canine caffeine.
Aral, everyone knows the Navy is more fashion forward and everyone knows why.
I came to just as I pulled into my driveway - thanks for the smelling salt. That wasn't smelling salt? Eee. Good point TLP., unfortunately I was powerless not to drop as fatigue had set in.
"Step on me - I pity the poor fool who steps on me!" G said as she turned and sashayed out the door with an oddly shaped mark on her back.
Well, Barbie comes with instant karma for here I am, feminist me, with a Barbie loving little bohemian girl obsessed with owning Barbie pompoms... a 20-30 times mention of said pompom desire is fatiguing indeed... as is my being up at 3 am surfing the net but hey, not easy to go back to sleep after 1 1/2 hours of wrestling a shrieking, sweaty and soggy mess of a bohemian boy!
Your definition speaks my mind Doug. Fatigue: Falling asleep alongside your six-year-old at 8 PM (neither of you making it through the bedtime story)while the dinner dishes lay undisturbed, the day's mail unopened, the blog left with no comment.
41 comments:
i'm so tiowed... i need a west...(were we *not* just talking about this yesterday??)
too fatigued to be clever. (by golly, this could have been 3D's word... i'm guessin' she's used it on more than one occasion! perhaps teh Penguin is feeling a bit fatigued herself these days?)
i am laughing and laughing and laughing!! for i was too fatigued (and hasty in my desire to be first?) to notice your clever multiple/fatiguedriven (i'm guessing) postings!
so... how's that conference workin' out for ya?
Fatigue: a state of mind in which one is easily amused and/or repetitive.
fatigues. I like fatigues. There's just something about a guy in fatigues. Perhaps that's why I had Barbie date G.I. Joe instead of Ken. Well that and Joe had guns and tanks and super cool gadgets. Oh yeah...Go Joe.
Whoa......
5 posts? Now if I didn't know any better, I'd say you did this to yank our collective chains, Doug. But I suspect the last thing you'd do while stuck in conference purgatory is create more work for yourself here, plus Blogger has been buggy.
Still, I'm fatigued trying to figure out which post to comment on. Good thing I have my Hazelnut coffee with lateeda (read 2%) milk from Panera Bread and my golden raisin scone to fend off this fatigue.
oqzvstve - Doug's dad is inquisitive
5 definitions out of which 4 have the same timestamp? Douglas, you may think you are clever with this word, but to me you are so damn tiresome
fotfdkw: wot they do with kiwi fruit when hard up
Puppybrose, I had no idea, either. When I left to walk my sister's dog I thought I still hadn't posted successfully. When I started deleting the others I got the same "page won't load" message I was getting posting before I left. So now I think I'll just pretend I meant to use five of the same post to illustrate "fatigue."
Jenna, Barbie was G.I. Joe's beard.
Sar, I sure wish I'd been trying to be clever. Funny verifier.
Brian, I sure won't catch it on person. Jaundice is more my aspiration.
Karma, see above.
Oh my! I'm so tired I didn't even notice the 5 postings. Is it time for a nap yet? Wait...it's always nap time. What am I saying??
fatigue: The feeling that overwhelms me when the clock strikes 6:00 am and my smallest child summons me to get my lazy butt out of bed and start our day together!
I, too, did a double take! LOL, seems fitting, though. Fatigue: a completely drained feeling that cannot be relieved by rest. Most unclmfortable. Diane
Just looking at this multiple post and trying to figure out where to comment has left me exhausted.
Generally when I'm fatigued, there's plenty of evidence of things done, not left undone. OH! Wait! Sure! A dog could be fatigued undoing stuff like the flower bed, the trash cans, etc.
fatigue: the feeling of immobile satiety after having polished off an entire picnic ham by oneself.
get it? FAT-tigue? get it!
oh Ha! so humor my face laughing, oh!
this gets funnier ... I didn't realize that if I comment on one of the "middle" Fatiques that it wouldn't show up on all of them.
I'm tired just looking at today's W.A.!
fatique, well when I looked at my home page and saw that you had updated three times I thought that you must be really fatigued.
Whatever it is Doug .....it appears as though you have a case of it.
ewww more than three times.
fatigue-what I will be feeling when I get back from Idaho. Actually, bump that...what I am feeling now.
Have a good weekend Doug.
It's amazing how different the world can look through the filter of fatigue.
The sun becomes a blinding, burning, headache producing circle of hate...that first cup of coffee becomes pure necessity instead of pure pleasure...a hang nail, a stubbed toe elicit screams for the paramedics...you believe with all your heart that the slow driver in the fast lane is there to annoy and infuriate you...only you...and for no good reason you find yourself rambling on and on, only semi-coherently, in spaces reserved for short, witty quip-like responses.
...at least that's what I've heard.
getting your boyfriends cold and trying to find a three bedroom apartment in san francisco for under $2100.
Oooh! I second Jenna fo sho! Me like fatigues! Forget guys though... I like them on ME with the right tough-girl-yet-hinting-on-sexy accesories... sizzlin'!
Barbie? I kinda was done with Barbie (or perhaps they were taken away, I am too fatigued to remember) after I learned that all I could do was cut the hair of all the Barbies and as for Ken, they got it on... oh yeah! Perverts R' Us fo sho!
Lil' Mischief is an expert at causing much fatigue in this household. I am tired just thinking about this damn word. I am going back to bed. I am done, DONE!
Jenna, today is cancelled. Sleep well.
CJ, you should keep bean bags by your bed.
Diane, good to see you again. Apparently synthetic testosterone can help with that.
TLP, or from posting.
First Nations, whole hams make me giddy too.
Dddragon, a lot of people were tired from yesterday's too.
Cooper, it was a tough morning for me online.
You too, Masil. Tear it up.
Joel, that was a pretty essay.
Hermana, fatigue is the child of children.
Rio, two things I've never done.
I actually wasn't a big Barbie girl. I had more fun with the G.I. Joes. Err, aah, hmm. Anyway...I quickly tired of the plastic doll after I "oops" ripped her leg off and the dog used it for a chew toy. No one gave me another Barbie. Well, after I dyed her hair purple with Kool-Aid and gave her a make-over with Sharpie's. Apparently Barbie wasn't ho-ish enough. I caused my mom fatigue...a lot.
The woman at causes me much fatigue. And ire. And the need to kill. But mostly...fatigue because I didn't think it was possible for anyone to be this stupid...and yet...here we are...a company of fatigued employees because of one dumb chick. I think her brain has been fatigued to death.
FATIGUE.
adj. The dirty details in the sink and on the floor that are the fitting punishment for your rash decision to host that party.
n. The secret collusion between McDonald's and Weight Watchers.
:)
also:
n. The effect of leaving your heart - and the contents of your wallet unto the third generation - in San Francisco.
[shakes dust off feet as he steps into car bound for home sweet Maine]
THUD.
Relax. You need it.
According to the NIH, *brightly* there are ways you can reduce fatigue:
*Get adequate, regular, and consistent amounts of sleep each night.
*Eat a healthy, well-balanced diet and drink plenty of water.
*Exercise regularly.
*Learn better ways to relax. Try yoga or meditation.
*Maintain a reasonable work and personal schedule.
*Change your stressful circumstances, if possible. For example, switch jobs, take a vacation, and deal directly with problems in a relationship.
*Take a multivitamin. Talk to your doctor about what is best for you.
*Avoid alcohol, nicotine, and drug use."
Please comment on how many of these apply to you, Doug. Thanks so much.
xoxo
Doug, I know it wasn't intended but your post(s) is/are hilarious today. And, despite yourself you gave a brilliant example of the definition of the day!
The multiple posts are the substance of what you intended, and the blogger screw-ups evidence of one thing undone-that is, switching to another blogging platform.
Are you fatigued with Blogger yet?
And by the way, hats off to houseguests who walk the dog! You sister must be so happy to have you there (besides, of course, being able to bask in your charm) :-)
i should have said earlier (at least in *one* of my earlier comments on *one* of your earlier posts):
Fatigue: a state of mind in which one is easily amused and/or amused by repetition and/or is repetitive. or is that redundant? (too fatigued to know/care)
(seriously? i think you should have kept quiet about blogger's bugaboo-boo, 'cuz this was a seriously funny post. seriously.)
Lammy is right.
Thanks for your concern Brian (notice the others stepped right over me) - it's the fatigue set in. thud.
g: i thought you were just taking a nap.
I see you used a scripture from the Holy Bible as the basis for your definition. Bless you, my son.
Fatigue: My poor, old doggie, Simba is constantly in this state. She used to have some pep in her, but the old girl just lays around and ocassionally lifts her head to acknowledge my presence, then quickly goes back to her slumber. She needs some caffeine, I think.
Ahh, just practicing the Jewish Guilt thing.
I always found it interesting that they wear "fatigues" in the army... We just wore khakis in the navy.
Safe travels, OC!
Anomie, you've been buying furniture, haven't you?
Jenna, you've seen The Pansifiles, right? Hoeish enough Barbie's yonder.
O Ceallaigh, I'm wise enough in that regard. Safe travels.
Brian, you may have a hip too many.
Will someone please put something stinky under G's nose?
I can't, Lammy. I...just...what were we talking about?
Mireille, I use curmudgeon yoga. You may know it as cussing.
Kyah, I want a typepad.
Puppybrose, I tried not to delete the one you left that one. Very good. Sometimes the world plots against you on your own behalf.
Brian, how about the tired blogging nobody?
Ariel, if Lammy were right she wouldn't be Xxx.
Stinkier, people, get G something stinkier!
You know Jamie Dawn, I was going to put the quote from Hebrews below today's post just because I think you can maybe go to hell for plagiarizing Apostles but I bet myself that you'd recognize it and wanted to see. Now I'll go to hell for your affection. And I find cow's blood is canine caffeine.
Aral, everyone knows the Navy is more fashion forward and everyone knows why.
Nice, Sar. Thanks.
Hey G, if you lie down, people will walk on you. Just sayin'. You're lucky that they stepped over you.
Fatigue: result of tryin' to keep the customer satisfied. Just how many steps are you from the county line?
I came to just as I pulled into my driveway - thanks for the smelling salt. That wasn't smelling salt? Eee. Good point TLP., unfortunately I was powerless not to drop as fatigue had set in.
"Step on me - I pity the poor fool who steps on me!" G said as she turned and sashayed out the door with an oddly shaped mark on her back.
Well, Barbie comes with instant karma for here I am, feminist me, with a Barbie loving little bohemian girl obsessed with owning Barbie pompoms... a 20-30 times mention of said pompom desire is fatiguing indeed... as is my being up at 3 am surfing the net but hey, not easy to go back to sleep after 1 1/2 hours of wrestling a shrieking, sweaty and soggy mess of a bohemian boy!
Fatigue... exhausted by the word.
Actonbell, that looks like Manhattan after an earthquake.
TLP, I try to keep one foot on the other side.
G, that looks a lot like a stiletto heel.
Very cute this time, Actonbell.
Miz B, Sueños dulces, hermana.
a4g, that's awfully funny. AM dial should be listed as a language. As was your enjoyment of my blogger misfortune.
Your definition speaks my mind Doug.
Fatigue: Falling asleep alongside your six-year-old at 8 PM (neither of you making it through the bedtime story)while the dinner dishes lay undisturbed, the day's mail unopened, the blog left with no comment.
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