Monday, June 23, 2008

Homeopathy

HOMEOPATHY, n. A school of medicine midway between Allopathy and Christian Science. To the last both the others are distinctly inferior, for Christian Science will cure imaginary diseases, and they can not.

2008 Update: An art of healing which assumes that water remembers and patients forget, two well-tested hypotheses. Homeopathy has been in decline since it was discovered that litigators have better memories than water or libertarians.

21 comments:

mireille said...

Also, a good litigator can scare the health out of you. xoxo

TLP said...

Homeopathy: The yellow brick road to your house.

Jamie Dawn said...

Homeopathy: "Head On!! Apply directly to the forehead." And other crap like that.

karma said...

a 5000 year old science that keeps watered-down homeos erect

whcihvpo: which have potency

Tom & Icy said...

Oh. I thought it was being sick and tired of being home too much.

Jim said...

I cured myself of nearsightedness by inflicting a sharp stick into my worst visioned eye. When my wounded iris healed I could throw away my glasses. Now I use only reading glasses.

Had I done this a few years ealier I could be the inventor of the lasik procedure.
..
Homeopathy: My dog, Adi, should also get some credit for this discovery. She didn't know yet to come when I called. I was bending down in the back yard and got this dead tree limb stuck into my eye.
..

Ariel the Thief said...

LOL Icy!

Homeopathy: if your hand hurts, I'll drop a brick on your foot, so you won't feel the pain in your hand anymore. Oh wait...

Doug said...

Mireille, a homeopathic dose of litigation cures a lot of life's ailments, though.

TLP, I think bad breath is the homeopathic remedy for tornadoes.

JD, is it me or do those commercials make you want to take Aleve, too?

Karma, that's the worst kind.

Icy, that's the kind of experience that makes you invent osteopathy.

Jim, I might just have to try that, although teaching Willie to not fetch may take a while.

Nono, Ariel. That's good. Then a 2x4 board across the side of the head to cure the foot pain.

Anonymous said...

Salaam alaikum--a year ago could write peace in Arabic,where does the time go...Am saddened by my lack of seeing the tree and not the leaves,,have spoken with both horses and cows--my apologizes to both for lack of attention !!!.......Modern World Homeopathy--one or more couches and T.V. sets..view the newest ailments to curse woman and man..call and confirm appointment with ama dr.--Cure is available via large sums of monies(cash,insurance,government)--Cure can be mailed,delivered,or in-person pick-up....One should demand that cure be totally synthetic and build up in body to assure complete and through sidebar issues..Shot or two of brennivin a day helps keep ama away---Peace Always---BLESS

tsduff said...

LOL Jamie Dawn and Ariel! Funny comments.

My dad's home cure for a sore throat was to gargle salt-water... true, after gagging and wretching I forgot all about the sore thoat for a minute or two.

Minka said...

homeopathy,n. anything recently discovered in the rain forest, at the bottom of the Dead Sea or on the point of a needle. They keep the best stuff in those places!

javajazz said...

oh well,
so much for "like cures like".
like, i'm picking up
a wee bit of scepticism here.
the body doesn't lie,
even if politicians do.

TLP said...

Who told you about my breath?

Nessa said...

Homeopathy - snake oil in a "green" package.

pia said...

This better take :)

What MizzyB's husband, Loverboy, practices

G said...

I'm having a bad memory around castor oil...though I'm all for homeopathy. I loved Mirielle's quip.

cooper said...

Homeopathy: Creationism for the ill of body.

Indeterminacy said...

Homeopathy: really powerful placebos.

Lisa Marie said...

Homeopathy sounds so homely... like the sort of remedy you'd get from your grandmother to soothe mind and body... you know, whiskey!!

actonbell said...

I'm with you, Lisa Marie. A little alcohol never hurts.
Happy Tuesday!

Doug said...

Aluikum salaam, Bear. There is no cure for disenchantment with medicine.

Terry, I use salt water and it works great. For sore throats and storing sharks.

And in the skulls of penguins, Minka.

JJ, it's true, though. A dilution of folly cures fools.

TLP, a dragon.

Nessa, it's getting hard to find anything not in a green package at your local big box distributor.

Pia, he isn't an osteopath? Oh my.

g, a teaspoon of castor oil in a pint of water will fix that right up.

I love it, Cooper.

That too, Indie.

Hey, there, Lisa Marie. Yeah, that can work.

Actonbell, I hadn't counted on you for the dissent. Happy Tuesday.