Saturday, July 01, 2006

The House

Story #51, A tale of the spirit.

To hear the story, come to meet the lady of the house, as drawn by Gustave Dore.












To read the story, come meet the man of the house as drawn by William Blake.

This week in The Prattler, "Knuckle v. Tongue Dragging







Happy Canada Day to Canadians! You guys are still up there, right?

And Rabbit! Rabbit!

51 comments:

Anonymous said...

Penguins first! and Rabbit, rabbit!

Ariel the Thief said...

beautiful story. I am now in love with you all.

Ariel the Thief said...

and Doug, er... did you get a number?

dddragon said...

Rabbit Rabbit

(can't read at this particular moment, broken link, eh?)

Doug The Una said...

Rabbit, rabbit, Puppytoes!

Ariel, we're all in love with you too. I think the number's in my old coat pocket.

Rabbit, rabbit. Thanks, Dddragon. It's fixed now.

dddragon said...

wow, I didn't know that you had been to our church!

(btw, Bethlelem has a Moravian Trombone Choir)

Anonymous said...

so glad you fixed that link... in my haste to be first (for it might be the last i'll get to do so) i failed to mention the fact that i was unable to read your latest tale, either! and it would have been SINFUL to miss something this good!

WHAT a *wickedly* funny and clever story this was. i suspect TLP will be thrilled to be portrayed in such questionable light! 'twas a gem, i tell you, A GEM!!! (Deadwood reference intended)

Tom & Icy said...

Cute story. TLP has always been one my my and my father's (the Devil) favorite bloggers. You really would make a good Darth.

Lila said...

That's a great one! I love it! My UU church is just like that, too.

Rabbit, rabbit!

G said...

Nothing better than a good tale about a den of iniquity I always say. (must have taken you some time to come up with :)

Rabbit Rabbit!

Doug The Una said...

Dddragon, I've heard. And shouldn't every town have a Moravian trombone choir?

Thanks, Puppybrose. You make me glad I decided not to go with the Baptising in the desert story.

Lammy, that's an amazing new avatar. Like your father, you take many forms.

Aral, that's kind of how I imagine your church, too.

G, it was a solid week of unceasing effort. Rabbit Rabbit!

TLP said...

Let the world know that you had aces up your sleeve! You dawg you!

Great story. I loved it. You really have been to a UU church haven't you? Our current minister doesn't have a wife though. He's gay.

Anonymous said...

by the way, not to chance the subject, but will the lovely Sar get her own personal reading of this fine tale today? : P

Anonymous said...

or "change" the subject...

(see what your story did to me? it's warped my fragile little mind. and i have to get ready for a wedding for cryin' out loud!)

Logophile said...

Doug beat Lucy at cards??
Well, it is fiction, sure, whatever.
It's your story, tell it how you like. I have my doubt though, just sayin'.

Rabbit Rabbit

Happy CANADA Day!

Ooooo Canada
Our home and native land
True patriot's pride...

Anonymous said...

by the way, TLP? i have *always* been a HUGE fan of yours, and never MORE so than after reading this story. the more i know about you (real and/or imagined), not to mention your talented family, the more i wish i, too, were part of this fabulous Pez Dynasty!

uucly: lucy is *unbelievably* cool!

mireille said...

rabbit, rabbit. I ♥ the minister's wife. Like, I understand her. And I ♥ Lucy, too. She is one amazing matriarch. xoxo

Kyahgirl said...

Thanks for the Canada Day wishes! Whaddya mean 'are you guys still up there?' Can't you hear the singing and the squealing of all the cowboys that Jenna is chasing around? We're making a lot of racket.

I love your characterization of TLP and 'the church'. Very funny.
Rabbit, Rabbit everyone.

The amoeba said...

INIQUITY, n. Where you find the outcasts.

A real happenin' place you describe there, Doug. Is that why the waters are rising in Pennsylvania? (I hope all the PA Pezes are safe and reasonably dry)

Happy Canada Day! Back before strikes and TV times out destroyed ice hockey, I would watch whenever possible, especially Bruins vs. Canadiens. Both national anthems get sung at the start of these games. In Montreal in the 60s and 70s, a hybrid "O Canada" was sung in which the first six lines were in French and the last three in English. And the penultimate line was

We stand on guard for rights and liberty

Which is actually a close rendering of (what I learned five minutes ago is) the original French text. But in that place and time, it sure sounded like "In your face, English Canada".

Anonymous said...

Happy Canada Day my defining Canuck buds!

I have a hang over. What? Had to celebrate the end of June... tonight may hurt.

Loved, loved, loved the story. I love all dens of iniquity.

And Kyah, babe, the cowboys aren't squealing nor are they running.

Rabbit, rabbit back atcha.

Miz BoheMia said...

OK!... I am WAY behind! The bouncer at the door kicked me out of the party though you are not to blame oh brotha because said bouncer was husband, children, life, Spain all rolled into one. But I kicked him where the sun don't shine and here I go!

Chatham! Ooh so pretty! Nice meeting you wise feline! I have a soft spot in my heart for felines though I shaved mine because I cannot say the same thing for their fur. Forgive me! And so catnip... would have said "the meow's crack" but I see that Joel beat me to it! Damn bouncer!

And I missed an actual party! Mon Dieu! Happy belated one oh adopted Papa of bohemians extraordinaire! May you have a beautiful year up ahead and many fab hikes with the Dawgy Doug! Fo' sho'!

Fairy... apparently me in a straight woman's body, or so Ziggy tells me. I say, do not utter the words "I don't belie..." shhhh! SHHHH!!!!! CLAP PEOPLE! CLAP I SAY!!!

Dramatist... Hmmm... I know nothing about the subject. NOTHING!

Ok, now to today... ahem, ahem... Oh that TLP!!!

YEAH! BoheMia over and out!

Oh! Wait! I like Canadians! They are good people...

TLP said...

We're publishing this, right? It should be a movie. I think Shirley Maclaine should play me. Al Pacino will play Doug. Anybody else want a part?

Ariel the Thief said...

if Al Pacino plays Doug, I'd like to play the minister's wife. pretty please?

Miz BoheMia said...

Oooh! MEEEEE!!!!!

The amoeba said...

I dibs the guy drawing faces on money. Sounds like my type. I always wondered how Franklin got away with all those "air baths" he's said to have shared with the ladies in the court of Louis XVI. Guess he didn't.

The amoeba said...

Vive la France, football fans!

Anonymous said...

Vive Zidane! Grrowf.

G said...

I think I could play a convincing degnerate - I'm in. Put some meat on Renee Zellweger's (sp) bones and she could play me. Yeah, so what if she's 10 years younger? Oh, and I'm not blonde - that's what hair dye is for - we can take care of that part no problem.

Speaking of dens of iniquity - did Doug get drunk on Mimosas with Sar?

Doug The Una said...

Haha, TLP. I guess I left out the part about the aces.

Puppybrose, I can now report Sar is delightful. Appetite of a bird.

Puppybrose, make sure you bring a cigar.

Mireille, I'm shocked! The minister's wife? Je suis something French! Alors!

Rabbit, Rabbit Kyahgirl. I thought I heard something.

Nice definition, O Ceallaigh. I'm pretty sure it's TLP's grandaughters who are responsible for the flood.

Thanks, Actonbell. I keep a few aces just in case.

Jenna, if they ain't squealing, you ain't doing it right. You have the ring of truth, though. Having been a cowboy I was pretty sure they weren't running.

Nice to have you back, Hermana. I was pretty sure something bad had you.

TLP, I had Halle Berry in your role but suit yourself.

Ariel, now that's good casting.

Miz B, play the monkey? That role calls for flexibility and sharp teeth.

You got it O Ceallaigh.

Jenna, Meow.

G, I don't drink so we went to an opium den instead.

G said...

Laughing - oh, much better. I mean the word is iniquity.

Sar said...

As I mentioned this morning, this was a fun story. TLP is herself a fun story. And hells yeah I want a role, TLP!

Oh, and appetite of a bird, Doug?! Pfft! And, fyi, the latest Sar Tour post is up.

Minka said...

I think it only appropriate to leave the 33 comment since you've achieved that number at my place:)
Thank yous so much for taking care of my home while I am away! It is highly appreciated.

Minka said...

Ok, just read the story and you are dead on. I am surprised they let yuou live after winning a hand!

Minka said...

Boy I am soooo good....got out of bed today and managed to be first yesterday. Thanx 3d ;)

Miz BoheMia said...

Monkey? Me? Hmph! Figures my brother would suggest that!

*sigh*

Oh, ok...

Unknown said...

phew. for a moment i though i was the minister's wife. then i relised i don't have long hair

Indeterminacy said...

That was a riot! And I listened to it on Sunday.

Doug The Una said...

G, it just seemed right for the Belle.

Sar, you audition well.

Minka, it was touch and go. Nice to see you 1st and 33rd. Dante would be proud. That's cryptic on purpose, yes it is.

Miz B, Shirley Maclaine and Ariel already got the sexy roles. Sisters play monkeys.

Hahaha, Karma. There are wigs in Hollywood.

Indie, Bless you my son. 5 to call.

Ariel the Thief said...

but Miz B! please do the Minister's wife! my hair is not long enough, and I run away from a room full of men. :)

Miz BoheMia said...

A room full of men? Pray do tell!

Thank you Ariel! If there is no one ready to kick me over it, I would love to and Doug... pfffft! Am I not sizzlin' then? *sigh* Perhaps not but A MONKEY???? Watch it or there may be a mysterious wad o' gum to be found in your coat! Hmph!

Miz BoheMia said...

But wait... do the minister's wife??? I need long hair for that? It really didn't hit me that were I not a monkey I'd have to be kinky! I'd have both the minister and the Loverboy ready to kick my a** if I did the minister's wife but... I guess it's art, no? NO????

reweggnr~ R EWEs and GaGs Not Required? Because I still have some reservations about girl on girl action... but...

ANYONE????

Ariel the Thief said...

oh never mind my English. of course it's art!

Kyahgirl said...

I think Ariel better keep the part of the Minister's wife! This I gotta see :-)

I'd like to be one of the gunslinger types hanging around playing cards with TLP. But, she'll have to put out the stogey or I'll end up hurlin'.

Jamie Dawn said...

Den of Iniquity: Any place where people gather.

Good story! That TLP is one tough cookie!!

mireille said...

Interesting how no one wants to play the minister's daughter. heh. And you know there is one. heh. xoxo

Miz BoheMia said...

Hey! What's wrong with me playing her dear Kyah? I am willing to kink it up for art, ART I SAY!!!

Doug The Una said...

Dddragon, I'm laughing pretty hard right now. But you'll admit, it's all brilliant.

Ariel, I've been shaving Walela to make you a wig.

Hermana, a s e x y monkey.

There you go, Miz B. How about you and Ariel as the Minister's wives. I think polygamy must be allowed in that church.

Sure, Kyahgirl but as a Canadian you'd be perfect for the Social Justice Committee.

Great definition, Jamie Dawn, and I hope I didn't make TLP to be too much of a suzie homemaker.

Mireille, I envision the minister's daughter wearing a lot of make-up and perfume.

Gracious of you, hermana. Sizzlin'

Kyahgirl said...

If I was on the Social Justice Committee would I have to go in the back and get it on with the Minister's wife? If not, you can give me the job and I'll recruit Mistress Anna and Jenna. I'm sure 3 Canadians can correct a lot of problems!

and Miz B, I just know you could do a fine job as the Minister's wife, its just that when Ariel volunteered its seemed so out of character that I got really curious about what she has up her sleeve. Well, of course, in this case, there would be NO sleeves but you know what I mean.

Wow Doug, you created a pretty 'real' story for us if we're still arguing about who is going to play what part!

Anonymous said...

You have quite a little den here yourself this weekend I see.

Cool story- nice church.

Ariel the Thief said...

yeah, I wouldn't be surprised if that Minister had some more wives up his sleeve. :-P I'll make sure to make up for her loss to Walela, Doug.

Doug The Una said...

Kyahgirl, I figure there were four on the SJC (I just know UU's abbreviate everything.) Maybe Jenna and Anna could make it with Minister's wives if you're shy. And you need to watch that Ariel. She'll surprise you again.

Thanks, Alice. You'd make a good lector.

Me either, Ariel and Walela appreciates it.