Tuesday, July 11, 2006


DISENCHANT, v.t. To free the soul from the chains of illusion in order that the lash of truth may draw blood at a greater number of points.
Now Mary Walker disenchants
All eyes that on her figure dwell
Apparelled in a pair of "pants"
That fit not wisely but too well.
But Mrs. St-w, bewitching thing!
Charms most where most her trowsers cling.
2006 Update: To stay for breakfast.


Evil Minx said...

Stay for breakfast? I'd have said it was the farting in bed the night before that would have had the disenchanting effect -- no?

Evil Minx said...

And yay! i'm first! i can't believe it!

I'd like to thank my mother, my sister, my best friend and her tabby cat, my turtle, and the strange small piece of fluff i found under my pillow this morning.


Anonymous said...

Disenchant: The pursuit of intimacy often leads to a loss of enchantment.

Disenchant: What happened to Cinderella as the clock struck midnight.

Anonymous said...

...not the least bit disenchanted to be 2nd!

Anonymous said...

Disenchant: to tell your kid there's no Santa Claus.

Sar said...

Disenchant: To meet and learn the reality behind many an avatar.

See: who are you people and what have you done with my blogger buddies the tan pez dispenser, the dragon, the teacup, and the dog?!

I, of course, really am a stiletto.

Mistress Anna said...

The feeling someone has when one party says they will "call you" and the quick realization that this statement is a complete and utter fabrication. Whoa I must be channelling cranky ex-girlfriend vibes today.

Anonymous said...

Probably your most clever definition in many a moon, a subtle variation:
to see fully clothed

Anonymous said...

Disenchant: to fracture the fairytale

Doug The Una said...

Minx, well done on your firstness and discretion.

Cinderella, Joel? The poor handsome prince. And you're a sport.

Brian, that ain't toast. It's your record collection.

Puppybrose, I had a friend from your part of the world (Turlock, to be specific) who used to take his 5-year-old grandson rabbit hunting and whenever someone bagged one would yell in outrage "Hey! You just kilt th' Easter Bunny!"

Sar, I knew I should have brought Willie to breakfast for a recognizable face and wit. Sorry to disappoint. And it's true, folks. I had brunch with a shoe.

Anomie, nothing steals magic like morning.

Mistress Anna, I'd never have guessed. Of course, if they actually call the disenchantment can be a lot harsher.

Pia, I love the irony you worked into that one.

Puppybrose, fairytales are for fracturing.

Minka said...

Everything after "I do!"

Sar, I am not really a penguin either, there are none in Iceland ;)

Anonymous said...

The feeling many a parent experiences after a day at the "Magic Kingdom."

Anonymous said...

doug: fairytales... and preconceived notions of "the perfect girl"

TLP said...

Disenchant, v.t. To leave before, breakfast. Also see, was it that bad?

For more on this subject see, inevitable.

G said...

disenchant: to present as diamonds that which is really cubic zirconia.

Anonymous said...

disenchantment: When the Prince and the Dwarf's carry Snow Whites coffin and stumble, causing the piece of the poisonous apple to fall out of Snow White's mouth..... the spell was disenchanted!

TLP said...

What's that comma doing there after the word "before?" I'm disenchanted with Blogger. We need an "edit" option.

G said...

Doug - help her out - get that comma out of there right now! It's truly disenchanting for me to see a less than perfect definition dispensed by the Pez Queen!

Doug The Una said...

Minka, I don't know if you have encountered Encyclopedia Brown in your child- or auntie-hood but there was a story that turned on the exact point of their being no penguins in the arctic. Of course, you weren't born there, were you? Jury's still out as far as I'm concerned.

Joel, I love that and I bet it's a fact.

Puppybrose, you mean the late perfect girl?

TLP, thanks for giving the other side. That's why I always leave before breakfast.

G, during their marriage, my mother used to call my father a zircon in the rough.

Thank you, CJ, for giving us the plus side of disenchantment. It's really the best part of enchantment.

TLP, I've had the same thought, especially when I use the wrong homophone. Until they give us the edit option, why don't we just say that commas serve to divide items in a series, signal parenthetical phrases, and divide the words before and breakfast. Blogger owns us, but we own English.

G, see above.

The Village Idiot said...

Disenchant -- To actually pay attention to the man behind the curtain.

En-chant -- when all the monks start singing in a monotone

dis-enchant -- when they stop

Mistress Anna said...

Doug: You make me giggle.

Unknown said...

Doug, I'm OK, I had no idea about the Mumbai bomb blasts until after I got home - a colleague called to ask if I was alright. Blasts were targeted at innocent office-goers at peak time.

But it's a pretty gory scene here, over 300 dead, traffic jams - and of course, no trains running. phone lines all jammed, can't communicate with anyone

Doug The Una said...

VI, I'm not sure I'm not more enchanted when they stop.

Mistress Anna, this is why I blog.

Karma, thanks for checking in. I'm glad you're ok and sorry for those who aren't. Nothing disenchants like an idiot with explosives. Under the circumstances, I'm glad again that you're going on vacation.

The Village Idiot said...

Doug -- I actually understood that sentence. Should I be scared?

Should you?

mireille said...

It's more difficult to be witty when you wake up to something like Mumbai. The disenchantment of faith when faced with religious wars. xoxo

The Village Idiot said...

Ok I have nothing but this word veri demanded my attention

dderek -- an oil rig with a stutter

The amoeba said...

Minka got it almost right. But it's not, ahem, everything after "I do". Instead ...

DISENCHANT, v. t. To speak the first I don't.

Unknown said...

just heard on BBC that NY is also on the alert after the Mumbai bomb blasts. take care, whoever is in NY ...

Jamie Dawn said...

Great definition, Doug. Often times, you soundly trump Bierce with just a few perfectly chosen words.

I missed out on yesterday's word, and it was a good one.
Oh well, darn it!

Disenchant: To read the fat and calorie content on the back of the truffle box.

Anonymous said...

Diane (Feline Frisky) here. Disenchant - to catch the bouquet at the reception, then remember that the only Prince Charming in the crowd is the groom!

Doug The Una said...

V.I., I stay scared.

True, Mireille. That was a collosal buzzkill.

VI, the dderrick says gglub gglub.

O Ceallaigh, that's a good alternative.

Thanks, Karma. Sadly, New York being on high alert usually just means a politician is holding a fundraiser but hopefully no more bombings anywhere today.

Thanks, Jamie Dawn. That's probably a temporary disenchantment. Some day I want to watch you eat a box of truffles.

Welcome, Diane. My advice to all bridesmaids is don't forget the bartender.

G said...

Speaking of buzzkills, I thought you should know that Syd Barrett is dead - really, this time.

Sar said...

What?! Minka you're not really a Penguin?!

What's next, G doesn't really have a lampshade head; or there's more to Karma than her tush; or there's more than one cell to OC; or worse yet that VI's not really from a village?

And Doug, you surprise me. I was expecting you to tell everyone I was a total heel...er...that I have sole!

G said...

I can only take so much of this talk - you just wait! Pictures are coming...

Let's just stop with the shattering of all of our belief systems. The picture beneath my shade of your bruch is that of a Dog and a Stiletto and maybe a picnic blanket...lalalalalalalal,can't here you,lalallalalalalalallalal

irkjb: irked by your job? why - yes.

The Village Idiot said...

I am a mosquito Sar, just ask doug

Doug The Una said...

G, sorry to hear that I liked him. I'm not sure if that's a big transition.

Sar, everyone knows you're a heel.

V.I. when I saw your name come up with a comment I bet myself your comment would be "Finding out you aren't a mosquito."

The amoeba said...

Beware the power of the Dark Blob, he said, practicing his disenchantments (and his multiplication tables).


Anonymous said...

Disenchant: to step on a scale after 3 days of rigorous dieting and/or exercise.

Alana said...

Well in the spirit of it all I feel compelled to confess that while I'm pretty square, I'm not an actual four-sided, four-cornered square...sorry. I like to get to disenchanting upfront as I don't want ANYTHING ruining my breakfast. Breakfast (making, eating, going out for) is one of my most favorite things in the Unverse! Really. So if there's gonna be breakfast involved I try to do at least three dozen disenchanting things beforehand to avoid any disenchantment DURING breakfast.

Anonymous said...

Disenchant: discovering cute "line buddy" at the Calgary airport was wearing a ring on his left hand. Duuuuuuuuuuuude. Disenchanted. Disillusioned. Sigh. Damn it.

I'm in California!!!! Whoooot! Didn't sleep last night! Holy Dinah it is hot here!

Miz BoheMia said...

Disenchant... yeah, buy me a burger... that'll do the trick!

It has been a loooong day... that is all I've got! ALL I SAY! Well, maybe this too...

vpjczbat~ Veronica's PJ sees a bat...

Mutha said...

Doug, you devil. I don't think I can come up with anything better than that...especially about that variety of disenchantment. But here's a shot:

Disenchant: To make the polish good for nothing. To slow the pulse instead of quicken. To feel the full effects of the hangover that time and experience can only offer.

Jamie Dawn said...

Puppy: The scale is indeed disenchanting. That is why I do not own one.

Doug: There are currently three left in my most recent bag of truffles. That is my panic number. When I'm down to three, I add truffles to my shopping list. Disenchanted is too light a word to describe what I would be if that number were to get to zero with no replacement bag on hand. I fear you would hear about it on the news.

Logophile said...

disenchant~ to realize no definition I can offer will compare favorably with those already available.

Logophile said...

well, that is to be disenchanted, but this late in the day, are you going to be picky?

Doug The Una said...

O Ceallaigh, multiplication tables carry the power of schoolhouse rock. As enchanting as enchanting gets.

Hahaha, Puppybrose or three months of talking about it.

I dunno, SG. I know you in person and if the squareness is a metaphor, it's pretty well manifest.

Told ya, Jenna. Welcome to the Golden State.

Hermana, if I buy you a burger it's just so I can have two.

See, Mutha, and I wish I'd written that.

Jamie Dawn, I'd rather watch you acceptance speech.

Actonbell, owl on it's way. Oh, wait did you want to know how or who?

Certainly not, Logo. It's good to see you.

Anonymous said...

Our love is never going to stop
Running away and flow like a river
Like a stone dividing the river
Tell me beautiful things

Our love won't look back
Disenchant or be the theme of a book
My whole life I searched for a simple verse
To transform what I am saying

Easy rimes, goose bumps
Pinch a finger, make a pact with me
A second of yours on mine
Happier for a second

Anonymous said...

disenchant - to look reality in the eye and own it.

Anonymous said...

Disenchant: to see and/or be the former Prom Queen and/or Football Captain at one's high school reunion.

Alana said...

You mean I'm an actual 2D shape with four sides and four corners? Why has no one told me this? I always thought I was a Square metaphorically speaking.

Now this is awkward.

Mikki Marshall said...

Disenchant, n. To free from illusion; the bare truth

ex. to sight your nakedness in the three-way mirrors under dressing room fluorescent lights.

(thank goodness for time differences)

Doug The Una said...

So, Shayna, disenchant is the act of tje second second?

Cooper. that's even nice.

Squaregirl, I meant the metaphor is accurate enough to be tangible. Your taking my literally is proof enough.

Still Life, that's why I buy my clothes in caves.