Wednesday, July 02, 2008

The Last Refuge (Some patriotic Noyes for TLP)

The wind was a stream of fervor among the townsfolk July Four,
The fields were a broad and fertile national metaphor,
The fireworks were dazzling dahlias in a garden of black sky
And a patriot started whining-
. Whining-whining-
A patriot started whining while his wife ate a moon pie.

He'd a Northrup King hat on his forehead, a Hank, Junior beard on his chin,
A silver cross across his chest over the tattoo "Born To Sin,"
His shirt ended halfway down his belly, his rubber boots were wide and tall
And he held forth on immigration,
. Foreign immigration,
Wages lost to immigration, and how we ought to build a wall.

As the night of Independence Day continued gayly on
The patriot kept on grieving over good days that had gone;
On the grass nearby, his neighbors celebrated freedom, filled with awe,
As he deplored the NAFTA treaty,
. The cursed NAFTA treaty
He cursed the NAFTA treaty and vowed "there ought to be a law."

When the band had cased their instruments and the pyrotechnics had gone still,
The patriot picked up the empty cooler and set it by his cooling grill.
As the parking lot emptied out under a sky now filled with smoke,
The patriot could be heard at last
. His voice louder than the drums, at last;
In a voice as loud as a drum blast, the man told a stupid joke.

"How many arabs does it take to change a light?" he asked.
"None, they just break wind on termite hills, 'til the hill fills up with gas.
"Can you believe it costs me twenty bucks to drive to work each day?"
Then climbed up into his pick-up truck,
. His bumper-stickered pick-up truck
He cranked his one-ton pick-up truck and hammered it away.

And still every July Fourth, they say, when the wind is freedom's ghost,
The fireworks are dazzling dahlias, and the similes grow in rows,
And the band plays God Bless America, but for some years when there's rain,
You can hear a patriot in debt,
. A patriot owing on his tv set
You can hear a patriot rise to bless the troops at war and then complain.

HIGHWAYMAN, n. Yesterday's good Samaritan.

Oh, a programming note: The rest of this week I'll be in Indiana with honest people and questionable internet connections. Apologies in advance for late posts, unanswered comments, unvisited blogs, good moods, etc.


Nessa said...

I'm bouncing in my seat
for I have accomplished a stunning feat
I have quenched my blogging thirst
By once again being first

Nessa said...

Now let me go see what your post was about, Doug.

Nessa said...

A poignant poem, Doug, and apt at that.

I think you are visiting a dying breed. Have loads of fun and no exploding fire crackers in your pants pockets.

TLP said...


Wonderful writing job. You da bomb.

You met that guy while you were here in PA, right? I'm pretty sure I know him.

Highwayman: He took the high road and got to Loch Lomond before me.

Jim said...

HIGHWAYMAN: Texans and Californians love that NAFTA. Lots of port and HIGHWAYMAN jobs.

HIGHWAYMAN: If you're driving like I am today, Doug, why don't you spend the 4th and 5th at Blogstock '08 with us in Nebraska?

mireille said...

Wow. Planning on sharing those thoughts while you're IN Indiana? If you get anywhere near Sweetser (it's close to Marion which is between Indianapolis and Ft. Wayne), give my regards. I spent three of the most conservative years of my childhood there. Also, please eat some beef, tomatoes and corn -- it'll taste better in Indiana than anyplace else. Have a good trip and a festive Fourth, highwayman. xoxo

Anonymous said...

Where the ragweed is high as an elephant's eye,
And its fields run right out to the edge of the sky.

Ah, Indiana in the summer. I weep for thee. At least until I remember where the hallelujah I put the blasted chlorpheniramine maleate. Say hi to it for me, and give it my apologies for absence.

HIGHWAYMAN, n. One who, like a crow, makes a living off the road.

Jamie Dawn said...

I grant you pre-forgiveness, and I shall need the same.
To Blogstock I shall go tomorrow, then off to St. Louis to spend time with Keith's family.
I shall take a wee blog break.

Very good poem, Douglas.
Enjoy the Independence Day weekend!!
God bless America!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Willie, Waylan, Chris, & Johhny

Doug The Una said...

Congratulations, Nessa. They looked healthy enough last year.

TLP, Pennsylvania is one of the few states in which I haven't him. Do I need to spend more time there?

Jim, I'm flying or else it would be a cinch. I enjoy I-80.

Mireille, I'm experienced at redneckery. No need to hide anything. I'm going south not east but I'll wave.

Amoeba, I'll do so. Regarding Indiana in July, it's in the nature of tradition that it isn't usually well-planned.

Enjoy, JD and the same to you.

Quilly, I'm glad you didn't go into tombstone etching.

Anonymous said...

Dang it, Quilly! Just when I go and dig out my CD, you just had to go and mess with Texas.

Ah well, to the quick goes the worm. Wonder if they fed on any of the dead... Hiwaymen. ...

Anonymous said...

'Fess up, Doug. You're only making this trip to the Midwest 'cause you have an Indiana jones.


Anonymous said...

A wonderful poem Doug. Happy 4th. Don't let honest people affect you too much

TLP said...

Oh yes! You DO need to spend more time here.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

Highwaymen--thanks for spurring the memory banks,think the series Deadwood,was filmed in your neck of the sage,home to many a highwayman in the days of old--my home in days of youth--still alive to recall those grand days--mining a mile underground...could go on and on :-) ...certainly something to be said of men who rob you face to face,or of a woman who gives her life to try to save yours..a characteristic lacking with gw bush and company--a castrated bunch they are!!! Bring Back Highwaymen Honor to our government...May your travels be safe,enjoy the fourth of july---and in closing, may the God of gods Bless the world and everyone of us inhabitants .....Peace Blessings Prosperity---NO WHINING(i'm working on it) :-)

Cooper said...

Oh so cool, how much does it cost for a reprint on the copyright?

A toast (what do highwaymen drink - bourbon I guess), to bringing back a government with balls.

Safe Trip dog.

javajazz said...

enjoy your honest people,
travel safe,
and happy 4th of July...
i shall be older upon your return,
but so far,
that hasn't been an issue.

Doug The Una said...

Sauerkraut, I think those guys are more and more in the worm feeding business. Waylon and Johnny at least.

That has to be you, Amoeba.

Pia, like water off oilskin.

TLP, have your people call me horse.

Anonymous, thanks for the link.

Bear, there's just something about nostalgia and indifferent killers that go together.

Cooper, does this look like the Associated Press to you?

JJ, you havin' a birthday?

tsduff said...

My Sweetie played The Highwayman over and over again yesterday, and it was good to hear it after so long. As for your poem - it was another amazing effort, filled with irony and American nostalic holiday thoughts...I love most the fireworks blazing like dahlias.

Safe journey Doug.

Minka said...

amazing! the bearded chest with the tattoo and the silver cross were nicely depicted. Loved this one, although as a typical foreigner I did not get all the references. For one, what's a highwayman?

javajazz said...

yes, sir...the deed is done.
(sorry, just saw this today!)

Anonymous said...

Doncha just LUV patriate's???? He sound's so SEXY!!!!!
I dint get his joke tho!!!!!