Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
SHAMROCK, n. A trefoil which is more potent in politics than "the sword of Bunker Hill."
2009 Update: A clover bearing a single extra leaf representing prosperity to the Irish and ovine.
We call it lóhere, I've never really understood, ló means horse and here means testicle, but even a horse has only two not three or four, even. Maybe it is a luck.
I don't know about luck this morning. I have to be at the dentist in 45 minutes. Then, I have to stop at the store. And just regular stuff.
Sham rock: Cubic Zirconia.
What???? Someone had to say it.
TLP stole thunder. I had the same idea.
Great minds think alike, I guess.
Uhh... correction, TLP stole my thunder.
Your thunder, my thunder, it's all a sham anyway.
SHAMROCK, n. The foundation stone of Irish cultural identity - the true identity of which cannot now be recovered.
When St. Patrick brought English to Ireland - of course St. Patrick brought English to Ireland, 'cause St. Patrick brought the Bible to Ireland, and, as we all know, the Bible's original language was English ...
As I was saying. When St. Patrick brought English to Ireland, the natives, naturally, had some difficulty with the new tongue. It came to pass that the leader of the Google clan, The O'Google, needed a warlike emblem for his banners and shields, the better to inspire his troops and cast fear into the hearts of his opponents. He commissioned his artist to emboss upon the banners and shields the image of a cleaver - and, being an early adopter of technology (he was, after all, the O'Google), he made the command in English.
Well, the O'Google's artist was a frail, timid soul, much happier with botany than with bloodshed. What's more, he understood nothing of English - but dared not tell The O'Google this (see "timid soul", supra.) He couldn't figure out why the Google clan should go to war under the image of a clover, but that's what he could make out of what he was commanded to do, and so he proceeded to draw clovers on those banners and shields.
You can imagine the shock on the O'Google's face when he unfurled those banners at his next bellicosity, and saw that he was marching under the fierce emblem of a leaf. He was about to order the decapitation of the artist when he noticed the disarray of his opponents. They were falling over themselves laughing at the sham. The battle was soon over, and the Googles were victorious.
And the shamrock has been on the banners of Ireland ever since.
Next week: the tale of how a flightless bird came to be the defining symbol of the New Zealand Air Force.
Dang the amoeba! Why don't say how you really feel about Eric Schmidt. Any thoughts on O'Google Earth?
But TLP, I wanted to say it!
Shamrock -- sparkling paste.
Wait! I can do better than that! Isn't Sham rock any song put out by Abba?
A festival held every St P Day at RFK stadium in D.C..
In Texas every Shamrock has been renamed Valero.
Ariel, it depends on the method of observation. If you ask them, they will tell you four. Even the geldings.
Well, good luck with all that, Karen.
You bet, TLP. Glad it was you.
JD, she might steal your thunder, but she'll never take your new avatar.
TLP, thunder is real. It's lightning that's dubious.
Excellent, Amoeba. I believe every word.
Anonymous, you didn't ask me but I think it's the best planet ever.
Or Bobby Sherman, Quill.
Cooper, that's a well chosen venue, anyway.
Have you still got Hess, Jim?
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