New Reproved Wednesdays

Announcement: This week, we lay to rest the regular special guest Wednesdays. You people are lazy and make me sick. OK, actually I'm lazy and tired. I will be happy to have special special guest posts on upcoming Wednesdays when I hear from someone that they would like to do one, but no more standard special ones. I haven't really decided what features will go in this spot when there are no volunteers, but since, after almost two years, some of you haven't noticed that this site works poorly for tagging, today and future Wednesdays might offer the opportunies for me to scratch those itches you just can't reach on your own. Which is really why I was put here. Just to prove I haven't grown less warm and friendly, that's Al and I in Malibu, California on Sunday at the top, right.

OK, I'm much too fond of Mireille to not respond to her tag and, besides, she probably thought that stuff was perfume when she sniffed it. Here's the 4x4 meme resized to four by four.

Four Jobs I have had:
1. Cowboy.
2. Cook.
3. Construction Worker.
4. Floral Delivery (1984--1985.)
JACK OF ALL TRADES, n. Mistress of many.



Four places I have lived other than where I live now.
1. Northern Nevada.
2. South Chicago.
3. Lone Tree, Iowa.
4. Waleska, Georgia.
GADABOUT, n. A mobile mayor.


Four books I enjoy re-reading.
1. The Short Stories of Edgar Allen Poe.
2. Greek mythology.
3. The Bible.
4. Outer Dark, by Cormac McCarthy.
MYTH, n. Prior knowledge.



Four movies I could watch over and over
1. The Big Sleep.
2. Spartacus.
3. Unforgiven.
4. Shadowlands.
CINEPHILE, n. Viviphobe.

Knight

KNIGHT, n.

Once a warrior gentle of birth,
Then a person of civic worth,
Now a fellow to move our mirth.
Warrior, person, and fellow — no more:
We must knight our dogs to get any lower.
Brave Knights Kennelers then shall be,
Noble Knights of the Golden Flea,
Knights of the Order of St. Steboy,
Knights of St. Gorge and Sir Knights Jawy.
God speed the day when this knighting fad
Shall go to the dogs and the dogs go mad.

2007 Update: A bygone hero who defended the honor of maidens, the safety of the homeland and the ambitions of his faith while wearing a mask and robbed, murdered and debauched in every day clothes.

Kangaroo

KANGAROO, n. An unconventional kind of animal which in shape is farther than any other from being the square of its base. It is assisted in jumping by its tail (which makes very good soup) and when it has happened to alight on the surprised Australian it is usually observable that his skin is unbuttoned from the neck downward and he carries his bowels in his arms.

2007 Update: A reverse pachyderm of the southern hemisphere designed to demonstrate the coriolis effect. The kangaroo demonstrates the intelligent hand behind the origin of species, as had it evolved in Kansas rather than Australia, the kangaroo likely would have entered politics rather than pugilism.

A joke heard in central Queensland: A man who had grown up alone in the outback sent to Sydney for a wife. When the woman arrived she found an empty house with furniture placed outside in front. She asked the man why he didn't live in his house and he replied "I put the furniture outside this morning. If you're anything like a kangaroo, I figure we'll need plenty of floorspace."

Victory's Cave

Episode 4 of The Meditations of Diogenes The Cynic. The voice should sound familiar.

To hear the story, listen for Diogenes to philosophize.



This week, in The Prattler, "Polar Bears."




To read the story, dance with Victory.

Relaxation

RELAXATION, n. Figuring up to-morrow's profits, after you have finished working out to-day's losses.

2007 Update: Idleness earned in a long week of frantic shirking.

Resplendent

RESPLENDENT, adj. Like a simple American citizen beduking himself in his lodge, or affirming his consequence in the Scheme of Things as an elemental unit of a parade.

The Knights of Dominion were so resplendent in their velvet-and-gold that their masters would hardly have known them.
—"Chronicles of the Classes"

2007 Update: Painted, draped and drawn for maximum substance.

Special Guest Wednesday

This week, my guest is Diane (Feline Frisky.) Diane was asked to define Crafts.

CRAFTS: In the beginning, there was quilting, sewing, embroidery, crochet, weaving and knitting. These were not seen as pass times with free time then, they were skills. These things were taught in order to fill a need.. Once upon a time, girls were automatically taught these skills. Some of your Grandmother’s hand embroidered Tablecloths or Granny Square Quilt would pick up a hefty price on eBay. They are treasures.

As the homemaker became scarce, so did these crafts. These skills and many others, became hobbies when what they would create by hand in weeks, could be processed cheaper and faster by machine. Why spend all that time doing it yourself when you can buy one, just as nice, right now? These crafts faded into memory for the most part.

Thank goodness the older generations remained true to these crafts and kept them alive. A resurgence of the need for these skills eventually reappeared. Some saw the personal value of handmade crafts versus the manufactured, mass produced versions.

I remember my Great Aunt knitting me mittens and crocheting me stuffed animals. My maternal Grandmother knitted and crocheted afgans. My Paternal Grandmother was a seamstress. She sewed most of my clothes growing up. The corduroy dresses with the lace at the collar. She made my Barbie Dolls an huge wardrobe from her scraps. My Mom took up knitting for a while, then settled on embroidery as her passion. I have many beautiful tablecloths in my possession that my Mom crafted herself.

My maternal Grandfather was a wood worker in his free time.

I have dabbled in many, many crafts over the years. I have gotten frustrated and moved on, many times. I am currently deep into hand made greeting cards. I am not alone in this craft. There are at least 7 different recreational groups that participate in this hobby, in my area. One group, that I Chair, is over 70 members strong. We can’t get enough.

Why do I craft? I have time to spare. I am unable to work due to medical disability. I choose to be active through my hobby. Why card crafting? AH, it’s fulfilling for me. It’s simple to do with quick results. You can have a completed project in 15 minutes. No two cards are alike, ever. Most of the time I use rubber stamping as the tool I work with. Most times, these are grouped under paper crafts.

CRAFTS, n. Once a hand skill for making treasures, now kits that are manufactured for your leisure pleasure, a major contributor to our national deficit.

About Diane: Diane is a homemaker who maintains two environments lovingly. The first is a house in which she lives with her husband, Brian and three cats- Tucker, Blessing and Punkin. The second is her husband, in whom she maintains a home for a woman, a little boy and a dog. Diane, aka Feline Frisky fills both environments with things she's made lovingly by hand.

Diane is one of the most prolific bloggers around and shares with TLP and Mireille an affection for Maxine cartoons. The connection can be a little hard to make sometimes. The secret is out to those of us who have read her blog or her comments on other blogs, but Diane is sweet. Not that she's incapable of evil, but she seems it. Her site, Rats Are Yummy is a prodigiously updated invitation to share her thoughts, feelings, laughs, good days, bad days, slow days, holidays, arts and crafts. For those of us for whom creativity, artistic sense and fine motor control are lacking, her card-making is impressive. Some examples are here, here and here with a primer on rubber stamps, here. Her writing is breezy and impish, which either reflects her talent or how much time she spends with cats. I suspect both.

Rusty

RUSTY, adj. The sword of justice.

2007 Update: Corroded from neglect rather than eroded from use.

Reception

RECEPTION, n. Fireworks, flags and foolish talk.

2007 Update: A joined celebration of revised misfortune and feigned appreciation at which the ungrateful honor the unworthy in memory, poetry and drink.

The Spring of Love

Episode 3 of The Meditations of Diogenes The Cynic. Thanks to this week's reader. Anyone recognize the voice?

To hear the story, listen for Pan's pipes.



This week, in The Prattler, The Case Against Torture.







To read the story, step aside from Diogenes' sunlight, alongside Alexander The Great.