Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Beggar's Tale

Late last night a panhandler stopped me, Terry and Bear
With a story just like every other, a wife and children in his care.
He works and lives a clean life without washing his hair.
But pennies wait for beggars who narrate, grate and dare.
This morning I turned on TV, a newscast waited there,
A billion dollar droning thing with a reputation to repair.
I don't know why a child to feed is worth more than a prayer
Or why a deadened repetition keeps you in your chair.
So, bless the nervous ne'er-do-well, if only life were fair!
A beggar might not be worth a listen but CNN's not worth a stare.

DRONE, v.i.  To intone without informing, alarming, alerting or intriguing, as custom compels and customers compensate.


pia said...

I like the poem and wouldn't know about CNN--my "landlords"/friends are here and CNBC is never off until Law & Order (any) is on

Anonymous said...

My alarm clock at 6 am drones on and on and on and on and on...until I hit snooze.

G said...

Did that beggar happen to have curlyish/slightly balding top?

Reminds me of the Monty Python skit: "I am a conservative and as such, I drone on and on and on..."

Ariel the Thief said...

I know a beggar, a young man, he looks at you with the eyes of Che Guevara, he always reads a book, and when you give him money, he says "Thank you!" in such a clear and polite voice as if HE did something for you.

Anonymous said...

In honor of pete(the rag man)....the only panhandler i have ever known to give change..i once gave a gentleman five dollars,his sign read--NEED BEER,i figured five dollars would get him a few 40 ounces,then he could continue with the daily grind with the proper state of bliss,,laid-out on a san francisco sidewalk...i was once party(3) to panhandling over 400 hundred dollars in one night---did get arrested,but was O>R'ed (a 3am kangaroo court)---used the money to bail a bud out of jail,then with the surplus we "freed" a couple of other(unknown to us),low-lifes...,to this day i still will pick up a penny....well have droned on and on.....better to drone on ,then be targeted by a drone.....Peace--THANK YOU !!!!!

Jamie Dawn said...

Keith and Taylor toured CNN whilst in Atlanta last year. Tay got a CNN t-shirt which he wears to church sometimes just to piss off the Baptists.

Drone: a preacher's gift

Jim said...

Drone: I like your poem, Doug, big time!

Drone: Anon. up there could buy three 40 and blunts with that three hundred, easily.

Drone: I generally respect those beggars, sometimes I even help them. None has ever asked for change, most times they ask for more.

Drone: I could go on and on so what, it would probably just gets sped read anyway along with the preceding drivel.

Jim said...

Drone: The drone of those NASCAR engines in unison is music to my ears, sounding similar, but not the music in-ear part, to the drone of a nest of hornets.

Drone: Target "drones" were used as targets to test our NIKE Hercules missles at the Donna Anna missle range in New Mexico.
Those early targets were piston-driven engine/prop propelled and made a droning noise, not unlike the droning of the NASCAR engines or hornets.
Later models are propelled by the more silent jet engines.

Drone: A modulated (??) drone in music is just a little more pleasant to listen to than a stable frequency tone (.e. the fingering of a violin)


So, if I gratingly dared you to narrate, would we both get coins?

And I would venture to guess that a child more or less comes up about at equal worth to a prayer, insomuch as *they* aren't listening either.


Tom & Icy said...

You didn't use 'underwear'.

actonbell said...

hehe, Tom. Thanks, Doug, that was good. It didn't drone on at all.

Isn't a drone a bee? (or not a bee?)

Omnipotent Poobah said...

drone: A bee that has sex once and dies. Personally, I think he got a raw deal.

javajazz said...

i dont know...
maybe panhandlerism
is just another form
of entrepreneurialship(ness).
maybe i should learn to
narrate, grate and dare.

quilly said...

DRONE v.i. to ask repeatedly for aid and receive only money.

Cooper said...

Great sleeping tonic - CNN.

tsduff said...

That guy was more interested in our buying his well rehearsed spiel than the final payoff of our one dollar bills. Well written observations Doug.

JJ - I like your own personal entrepreneurialship(ness). Don't change a thing :)

javajazz said...

(i liked extending that word.)
actually i know how
to narrate and grate already...
2 out of 3 ain't bad...

weirsdo said...

Good for you for sticking up for the undeserving poor.

Doug said...

Pia, Tim Russert raises the bar, watch you don't trip.

Jenn, with discipline you can learn to hit snooze immediately.

No, g. But I do.

Ariel, he redistributed your wealth.

Well done on your fundraising, Bear. That's a good story.

J.D., I'm sure it works just fine.

Jim, I read every word. Glad to hear we've made so much progress in our targets.

We just might, Gabriel. How've you been?

Or despair, prepair and unaware, Icy. Maybe next week I'll do Son of The Beggar.

A bee or not a bee, Actonbell. That is the question.

Sounds like a good deal to me, Poobah.

JJ. those who can beg, those who can't play their flute.

Quilly, that's excellent.

Cooper, it just makes me mad anymore. And when I get mad, I rhyme.

I agree, Terry. I think the panhandling industry needs to consider a more outcomes-based process. Mariachis and Indian eunuchs understand- you pay more for silence than sound.

JJ, I'm still going with flute-playing and word-coining.

Thanks, Weirsdo. Compassion is what I do.

sauerkraut said...

I could think of nothing pertinent the other day but reading Cooper's blog about Scottie Mc made me think of this word.

Drone: White House Press Secretary, past and present.

Dr. Minnie Strator said...

Drone: Non-administrative employee.