Monday, May 15, 2006


RANSOM, n. The purchase of that which neither belongs to the seller, nor can belong to the buyer. The most unprofitable of investments.

2006 Update: Yet another price associated with children, spouses, lovers and friends. Rarer than most but no dearer.


dddragon said...

Ranson: my mornings as I check to see what the word of the day is and whether or not I have anything to say, so that I can start my day off right.

Mutha said...

Didn't Demi Moore name one of her kids Ransom?

TLP said...

We ran some to try to stay dry up here in MA. Didn't run fast enough.

Ransom: What any mother would gladly pay to get her dearly beloved brats back.

Doug The Una said...

Dddragon, or what Redchief would pay you to take Goa'uld back?

Mutha, I have no idea. Maybe she used a Ouija Board and misspelled "Random."

TLP, you're still in your Mother's Day with Aral reverie. A little more snark, please.

Tom & Icy said...


Minka said...

Icy, you ok? That was such a short phonecall. I better inform Master Tom that somebody took you. That kidnapper is gonna regret the day he was born...

The amoeba said...

RANSOM, n. The wages of pleasure, and especially of sex. The price of remembrance. KING'S RANSOM: what it costs to celebrate your illiteracy, indolence, and lack of marketable job skills with a college diploma.

TLP, have you finished your Ark yet? My mother's building one as well.

Indeterminacy said...

Ransom: I'll comment at your blog, if you'll comment at mine.

Sar said...

Ransom: I'll hold you for it.

Logophile said...

Ransom~ The delicately reckoned total of not what something is worth, but what can be offered to reclaim it. More a reflection of one's bank statement than the value one places on one's people.

Now gimme some coffee and I won't hurt the dog.

The Reverent Eater said...

Rainsome: What it did here in Boston this weekend.

Doug The Una said...

Icy, have no fear. Walela's coming to liberate you.

Minka, meet Walela for the rescue. She can eat the kidnappers while you fetch Icy.

O Ceallaigh, what's the ransom for the critters on the ark?

Indie, I don't negotiate with terrorists.

Sar, I think you'll find the market isn't there.

Cowgirl, great definition. The latter in my case but just for one more month.

Logo, surely you don't mean good coffee.

Yeah, Manchego. We heard some of the drops from here.

Kyahgirl said...

*hands logo a big cup of coffee*

Ransom, I would pay handsomely to free the dogs from the clutches of the wicked ones. *glares at logo*

Logophile said...

WHAT?! I took em for a walk and let them play in the yard, sheesh, ya'll need to take a joke

Kyahgirl said...

ok, you're off the hook ;-)

The Village Idiot said...

First, I ran som.

Then I got hot

I flot sam in the river

with my brother

jet sam

Logophile said...

Doug, I wash my hands.
So sorry.

The Village Idiot said...

Oh come on..I have not even reached the depths to which I can sink

Logophile said...

Idiot, watch it, you are going to frighten the nice people.
I just KNOW there are some of those somewhere around here.

The Village Idiot said...

I am feeling something like a poke
with a sharp stick

The amoeba said...

Logo, rather than picking on the idiot, I have a suggestion for a more productive activity.

You can set the ransom for TLP and manchego to pay to return May to New England and take back your Pacific Northwest winter weather.

Doug The Una said...

Thank you, Kyahgirl. Unlike the menacing Logo, you're dependably kind to animals. Poor Ariella.

OK, Logo, but you did take the coffee.

Kyahgirl, you made that pretty east. OK, Logo, you're off the hook.

V.I., go to bed lam.

Logo, it's not your fault, you're just the judas goat.

V.I. that's not reassuring.

Logo, I used to number you among them. Alack!

Funny, O Ceallaigh. TLP is probably going home to sandy Pennsylvania but I bet Manchego and AP3 would pay.

LeMas. said...

ransom-a tangible way to evaluate your worth to society and to your loved ones.

Logophile said...

Doug~ I am always kind to the animals, it is the people who have to watch out. *pat pat*

O'Ceallaigh~ If I stop picking on the idiot he will think I don't love him any more, can't have that.
As for surrendering my sunshine, you people don't have enough to convince me to turn it over. When they hit 30 days in a row I will deign to sympathize.

Mo'a said...

Hello I am confused, but amused all the same. Tell me has ransom been paid? El losto!!!!!

The Village Idiot said...

Sunshine....I see no steenking sunshine...Remember, we only have two days of summer up here

July 5th and July 6th

That's my story and I am sticking to it

Ariel the Thief said...

I love your definition, Logo. how many great movies are made of that difference!

Indeterminacy said...

Doug: The last bastion of brevity has fallen! I thought you'd answer "No comment"

Anonymous said...

I got nothing...again!!! I know! It's left me baffled and sad too. *sniff*

I can't write. I can't define. I'm going to go pay the ransom on my muse because this is just not satisfactory at all. At. All!!!

mireille said...

So, is Icy safe or not? I'd like to make a contribution to whatever it is we have to give Logo to make her really cough up the dog. Hm. Bad phrasing. Comic image, tho. *heh* xoxo

Logophile said...

Mirielle~ All is well, Ariella just wanted a play date.
No dog coughing, ick

The amoeba said...

VI, I've been up there. Stop fooling. The season lasts until at least the 8th.

Logo, love at saber point, eh? Remind me to pack my mask and padded suit next time I visit Whidbey Is.

Jenna, rubbish. You have the Oilers. [grumble]. Wonder what the ransom would be for Chris Pronger and Sergei Samsonov ...

Kyahgirl said...

Mireille, s0 nice to see you. Hide Bucky from logo thought. :-)

O ceallaigh- why does everyone boo Pronger? wasn't that a great game last night? woo-hoo!

Doug The Una said...

Masil, if you're interested, I know people.

Logo, I'm sure you're nothing but gracious to your victims.

Mo'a, apparently there's some ransom outstanding. Let me know where we lost you and I circle back.

Village Idiot, and if I can't trust you who can I trust? Logo? Hardly.

Ariel, "the word" is good, no?

No comment, Indie. (You're right, that would have been funclever of me. Alas.)

Welcome, Brian. And you can bet I'll ransack the sommelier as soon as someone tells me which one he is.

Jenna, we welcome you with or without ideas. We're all a big family here. You will be one of us.

Mireille, I'm taking a collection. Need the address?

Logo, if we want to play with someone we ask them. We don't just run over and grab them.

O Ceallaigh, the Eastern conference just seems silly right now, doesn't it? I don't know if a resident of Southern California should be listened to but I think hockey's ruined. Surely, though, I have as much right to an opinion as anyone in Raleigh. Oh, and quack quack to you and Kyahgirl.

Sar said...

I beg your pardon, Doug, but I thought Poobah was the omnipotent one around here. So, what market is it exactly that you presume to be referring to? Hmmm?

Logophile said...

Ariel~ Thanks! There is a good Dick Francis book on the topic as well.

O'Ceallaigh~ Sshhh, it rains we tell you! RAIN! RAIN! RAIN! It is horrible! Everyone would hate it, they shouldn't even come for a vacation. We brought out special weather for you since you were working with the salmon. No sabers though, I prefer the apee but only if you are unprepared for a battle of wits.

Kyahgirl~ You are going to have Mirielle so worried she will only consent to Bucky/Ariella playdate in a public place with lots of people around and plenty of good lighting.

Doug~ I am very gracious, it is true, only the finest dog biscuits and plenty of chew toys. I guess I will call ahead next time and hey! I am also completely trustworthy. No, really I am, you can tell by my name, I am way, the truth, and the light, right?

Kyahgirl said...

Doug-quack quack yourself!

logo-that's as it should be. Casper is a bit jealous of Bucky, honing in on the curly babe that he drools over from afar.
*sigh* I wish we lived closer.

ariel-are you a Dick Francis fan? me too!

(are we really hijacking Waking Ambrose or what?)

Logophile said...

Kyahgirl~ I don't know if Ariel is, but I am!!
I am a notorious blog hijacker, even have one named that!

Mo'a said...

I get it "Waking Abrose" has been hijacked....? To tell the truth I am not quite up to this whity repartee....I shall however, pretend I know what is going on ;o

The amoeba said...

With all the dognapping and hijacking going on around here, there's going to be some serious dinero changing hands before this day is finally ransomed.

Kyah, maybe from your position north of the 48th parallel it was. Down here, there is weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth. Doubly so for me - because both Sharks and Oilers were made possible because the Bruins are owned by the firm of Scrooge and Marley.

Doug, you're right, it's a miracle I'm even talking about this game, what with the TV-extorted 90-second timeouts and the strike. Strange behaviors can be induced by avatars.

Logo, next thing I know you'll be telling me you knew Emmett Watson personally. 1970s T-shirt front: "Seattle's Favorite Tanning Lotion". T-shirt back: picture of "Rustoleum" paint can. It's Epee, by the way. :)

Anonymous said...

You're all too good for me so I bow out today.

Indie that was pretty funny.

Doug. A good reason not to marry or have children I say.

mireille said...

Yes, everything must be conducted in the BRIGHT WHITE LIGHT ... um, what were we talking about? K-girl, Logo? xoxo

Doug The Una said...

Come on, Actonbell. Like I wash clothes.

The market for your ransom, Sar.

Logo, say what you want, 10000 people from my part of the country are moving there anyway this year. And they're all stopping at your house on the way in.

Kyahgirl, into your good hands I commend my blog.

You, less so, Logo.

Mo'a, I have every confidence in your wit but until you find your confidence you can sit on the sidelines with me and cheer.

O Ceallaigh, the new overtime rules broke my heart. Funny about Boston. I hope my favorite hockey player/ Bostonian gets here soon to weigh in.

Amen, Alice. Although you remind me of advice I was given when I was 15 and working in a gas station. "Young man, I tell you never to marry and raise your children the same way."

The amoeba said...

Doug -

I wonder if the good people in Anaheim know that it's the HEN duck that does all the quacking ...

Logophile said...

O'Ceallaigh~ I was told as a young child that I was so cute I didn't have to worry about correct spelling, then I grew up and here I am sans cuteness and spelling ability both. Thankfully, I have my superlative dognapping skillz to fall back on.
As for Watson, our spiritual godfather, although I did not know him personally his influence is clearly everywhere in the Washington I grew up in.
"Californians, go home!" and
"No more californication" are also slogans made popular in my youth.
We are a warmhearted and welcoming bunch, just ask Mirielle.

Doug~ As long as they bring me some nice presents I could be OK with that.
And I cannot BELIEVE after all the recounting of your petty crimes, misrepresentation of innocent parties, and general misanthropy represented here on a regular basis that you, YOU of all people, would dare to besmirch my trustworthiness. I am wounded, Douglas, to my core. (sob sob)

Mirielle~ We were making a date for tea at the Village Yarn and Tea Shoppe then on to the dog park for Bucky and Ariella, how is 7:00 PM tonight for you? Not quite enough notice? Well, another time then.


Logophile said...

that should say,
Doug~ So a playdate next Saturday for Willie, Walela and Ariella?
If you drop them off I will bring them home and of course I will provide the snacks.

CozyMama said...

hey dude, good choice today...i got a re-design - check it out.

mireille said...

AWWW, don't be wounded to the core, logo. Where IS Doug? Um, Bucky and I need a little more time to put on our mascara, but we WANT to meet you and the beautiful Ariella at the yarn shop. don't forget. xoxo

Doug, love ya!!!!

Warm and welcoming, that's us.


Kyahgirl said...

o'ceallaigh, are you saying that the Mighty Ducks are all HENS???? *snicker*

...oh wait a minute...maybe you're saying a certain HEN quacks too much?

Anonymous said...

A bounty on the innocent.

Miz BoheMia said...

Ooooh! What a fitting word for my predicament... my classes have me hostage at the beginning of the week and alas, no one to pay my ransom!



.... shoot me!

Doug The Una said...

Mireille, stay away from the light! Zockso!

Once again, O Ceallaigh, you make me thankful to have a marine biologist around.

Logo, you just seem to sublime for this world is all.

Thanks, Jodes, I'll do that.

Warm, welcoming and awash the way I hear it, M.

Haha, Kyahgirl.

Weirsdo, the laws of supply and demand require a high price for innocence.

There you are Miz B! ¡Gracias a Dios! I've been looking everywhere!

The amoeba said...

Kyah. What are you impugning? Far be it from me to suggest that anyone on this sublime, intellectual, nicely mannered site is quackers.

I once observed a flock of American Widgeon ducks on a golf course in Seattle (the Seattle Golf Club, no less; I was a caddie). The hens were quacking like, well, ducks, but the drakes could only manage wee wee wee wee. Pathetic. And you didn't want your drive to land where the birds had been ...

Minka said...

I am first! Oh...the post isn´t up yet *tap, tap*...

Doug The Una said...

O Ceallaigh, what are you impugning? Sublime? Intellectual? Nicely mannered? Vermin!

Haha, Minka. OK, everyone, I was slow getting to the computer this morning in case you all wondered.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, O'Ceallaigh. That sheds light on one of my favorite literary characters, P. G. Wodehouse's oft-affianced Freddie Widgeon.

Doug The Una said...

Weirsdo, I can't think of a better phrase that "oft-affianced" My mom's a big Wodehouse fan.