MALTHUSIASM, n. An animated acceptance of the doctrines of Malthus.*
2007 Update: Darwinsomeness, hobbesacrity, swiftapalooza, populism. Thomas Robert Malthus was a 19th Century English economist and the second of eight children who, upon noting the prevalence of progeny in impoverished homes, cast his suspicion on Fibonacci, an Italian mathematician and likely rogue. In order to prevent a catastrophe of violence and malnourishment, Hobbes encouraged policymaking with an eye toward the barren deaths of poor and working people, reasoning that reducing the population of the poor would, ipso facto, reduce poverty generally as well as the number of criminals at a ratio of one to one, a reasonable conclusion that Marx would later reach regarding economists. Malthus proposed infanticide, murder and prophylaxis be counted among virtues for which he is numbered among saints. The controversy over Saint Malthus revolves principally around the matter of from which of the great religions he plagiarized his principle of selective salvation.
*The editor suspects his predecessor of having made this word up, perhaps to trap and cage populists.
Hear ye, hear ye! For those among you around long enough to know why this matters, the TV show "Extra" is supposed to have a segment on Schwartz Candies tonight. Anybody know what channel or time that's on?