Redefining misanthropy for a fresh generation. Standard posts begin with a definition from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary followed by a modern adjustment. Miscellany on Wednesday and storytelling on Saturday.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Arrested
ARRESTED, p.p. Caught criming without the money to satisfy the policeman.
Al: my thoughts exactly, only my version was gonna be Arrested: last one out the door (in a heist) and/or off the turnip truck.
as soon as the remaining neurons in my brain have had a chance to fire up properly, i'm sure i can come back with something better (don't hold your breath)
Quilly, chances are high...but i do know many of the policemen driving this area and I know mistakes they´ve made when younger and...well, they are always hesitant to stop me when I drive way over teh speed limit. I would never use that past information against them, but they don't know that!
arrested? not been there, never done that and I didn´t get the t-shirt either!
Good luck for me that I have not been Arrested.....according to my computer.....I have been comitting illegal acts....like trying to comment here for instance ????? It even told be I had a virus and I felt perfectly healthy....I don't have a virus at all.....It seems it was a google-blogger problem.....so I ask you who should be arrested ????????????
Maybe it was because I was first two days ago ?????
There was a face on a hoarding that someone had drawn on And just enough time for the night to pass by without warning Away in the distance there's a blue flashing light Someone's in trouble somewhere tonight As the flickering neon stands ready to fuse The wind blows away all of yesterday's news
Well they've locked up their daughters and they battened the hatches They always could find us but they never could catch us Through the grease streaked windows of an all night cafe We watched the ARRESTED get taken away And that cigarette haze has ecology beat As the whores and the drunks filed in from the street
'Cause the steams in the boiler the coals in the fire If you ask how I am then I'll just say inspired If the thorn of a rose is the thorn in your side Then you're better off dead if you haven't yet died
Or, in Oaxaca, to ignore the hints for your fine. As the kind officer told me as I handed him my donation, "Mister, this is no small problem...this is a biiiig problem."
Arrested: couldn't get arrested if I tried--not even in Oaxaca where I talked my way out of a soliciting charge the summer I turned sixteen. Wasn't soliciing--was out late
Arrested: What I hope doesn't happen today when Puppytoes, G, and Al all find themselves in the same locale. A meeting of the minds indeed! Pretty scary if you ask me...which you didn't.
Well I thought it was hysterical, but apparently not enough people appreciate watching and a dysfunctional family with characters who got out of serving in Iraq after having his hand bitten off by a seal. Good times.
By the way, I'm more than willing to pitch in to the fund for the future, as Im sure the entertainment value of hearing the story, will be well worth the price. I love a good arrest story.
arrested: denied intellectual access due to the lack of a few sense with which to buy a clue. [see also: "D'oh!"]
now, in my head that seemed kind of logical -- but then my head is spinning following a delicious 3 hour cup of coffee with a certain Lampshade Lady and a certain Guy Up the Hudson with Gun & Camera (who's own arrested sensibilities can be the only explanation for the fact he didn't tell his wife what he was doing today. that Al)
Squaregirl: "Arrested Development" was one of the best shows ever! (we miss it, too)
arrested: something which happens to the best of us at one time or another. At least I imagine that is what I will say when they finally catch up to me.
Sorry Mutha, this is like War of the Worlds, oh the humanity. It was a backjoke to some comment of Doug's as Al, Neva and I got together for coffee and tawk in Grand Central today.
Caught criming without the money to satisfy the police. Ah, how true! One morning when I was working as a newspaper spotter (I dropped bundles of papers off for the carriers) I got pulled over. Turned out I had a tail light out but I didn't know this until later because I was told to get out of the car and was frisked and asked if I had any knives, guns or hand grenades on my person. (For once in my notorious life, I'm not kidding.) Turns out I was being arrested for a four year old speeding ticket that I'd forgotten about. They said they'd let me go if I could give them $50. I asked what kind of idiot carried that kind of cash around at five in the morning. Guess I should have been that kind of idiot!
40 comments:
First? Have there been more floods in Iceland?
ARRESTED, p. p. "But what did I do?", said Ted.
Arrested: When judicial, bad for the perp; when developmental, bad for everyone else.
Great update this morning, Doug.
Al: my thoughts exactly, only my version was gonna be Arrested: last one out the door (in a heist) and/or off the turnip truck.
as soon as the remaining neurons in my brain have had a chance to fire up properly, i'm sure i can come back with something better (don't hold your breath)
arrested vacation the governemnt offers law breakers. They send you away until you arrested.
OC -- maybe Minka's been arrested and can't comment?
Quilly, chances are high...but i do know many of the policemen driving this area and I know mistakes they´ve made when younger and...well, they are always hesitant to stop me when I drive way over teh speed limit.
I would never use that past information against them, but they don't know that!
arrested? not been there, never done that and I didn´t get the t-shirt either!
Relieved from the burdens of freedom.
Arrested: W's development.
Good luck for me that I have not been Arrested.....according to my computer.....I have been comitting illegal acts....like trying to comment here for instance ?????
It even told be I had a virus and I felt perfectly healthy....I don't have a virus at all.....It seems it was a google-blogger problem.....so I ask you who should be arrested ????????????
Maybe it was because I was first two days ago ?????
There was a face on a hoarding that someone had drawn on
And just enough time for the night to pass by without warning
Away in the distance there's a blue flashing light
Someone's in trouble somewhere tonight
As the flickering neon stands ready to fuse
The wind blows away all of yesterday's news
Well they've locked up their daughters and they battened the hatches
They always could find us but they never could catch us
Through the grease streaked windows of an all night cafe
We watched the ARRESTED get taken away
And that cigarette haze has ecology beat
As the whores and the drunks filed in from the street
'Cause the steams in the boiler the coals in the fire
If you ask how I am then I'll just say inspired
If the thorn of a rose is the thorn in your side
Then you're better off dead if you haven't yet died
Good morning everyone. Rose here this morning. Just wanted to let you all know that Brian is home sick today. He only lasted an hour at work.
I am feeling fine though, so I am out and about commenting. It's very funny Doug, but my cliche poem for PT today is called "Papers Please". :)
Arrested: The deer in the headlights until; is that Geraldo??
Sassy Dewy
xo
handcuff me, dawg :P
Arrested: to lack proper protection.
Or, in Oaxaca, to ignore the hints for your fine. As the kind officer told me as I handed him my donation, "Mister, this is no small problem...this is a biiiig problem."
Arrested: couldn't get arrested if I tried--not even in Oaxaca where I talked my way out of a soliciting charge the summer I turned sixteen. Wasn't soliciing--was out late
Arrested?!
Gasp! What have you heard?!
O Ceallaigh, 'tis the dawn of the paramoeboid. That's probably good news, I guess.
Thanks, Al. On the other hand, Arrested Development, the band, was good news.
Puppy that was a pretty good start.
Quilly, do you know how to hit the cymbals in text?
Minka, sounds like Iceland is as lawless as it is godless. No wonder you have elves.
Welcome, G. Nat and may we all be so lucky.
Mine too, Tan Lucy. Come to think of it, you don't act your age much either.
Mo'a, the glory days aren't far behind you.
Shayna, those are such great lyrics I googled them. Imagine my surprise.
Dewy, sorry to hear Brian is feeling under the weather. You should try not to run outside in the cold while you're in charge.
Karma, guess I'll need two sets of cuffs, ey?
How many pesos is a beeeeg problem, Mule, and did you ask to see his badge?
Haha, Pia. Great comment. Any plans for the upcoming trip we should know about? In case the embassy calls.
Arrested: innocent
(opposite of Guilty: free)
I'm with Quilly - you ar rested after a vacation. :) D
*sigh* I loved the show Arrested Development. They take all the good ones off the air though.
arrested: detained
She stopped: arrested in mid-stride as her eyes beheld the stunning Adonis who was her Love.
arrested: That moment you realize your conversation with the police officer has just gone very very poorly.
Arrested: What I hope doesn't happen today when Puppytoes, G, and Al all find themselves in the same locale. A meeting of the minds indeed! Pretty scary if you ask me...which you didn't.
OK, Indie. Isn't that counterintuitive? What'd they get you on?
Diane, I'm glad it works for you.
I never saw it, Square, but I heard good things about it. Oh, well.
Terry, tell me she wound up in the fountain. Please.
Morgan, I usually know the first time I hear myself make a yomama joke.
Joel, I actually kind of hope the police get there in time.
fodder for lawyers
I've been wondering about this post. Maybe this is Doug's way of telling us he's been arrested and that we have to raise bail.
To be given a respite from criminal activity. Usage:
Tuckered out by his life of crime, Doug reckoned it was 'bout time he got hisself arrested.
Indeterminacy -- and he used his one free phone call to text his message in, hmmm?
Icy, I think the arrestee is the fodder for lawyers and the arrest is the pitchfork.
Morgan, if I have you right, justice is blind and gossip reads between the lines.
Not today, Indie, but it wouldn't be a bad idea to start a fund.
Great definition, Diesel, but you left off "again" from your example.
Quill, why wouldn't I just call my mujahadeen brothers instead?
Doug, look over your shoulder -- and don't ever go to sleep again. That's why.
Well I thought it was hysterical, but apparently not enough people appreciate watching and a dysfunctional family with characters who got out of serving in Iraq after having his hand bitten off by a seal. Good times.
By the way, I'm more than willing to pitch in to the fund for the future, as Im sure the entertainment value of hearing the story, will be well worth the price. I love a good arrest story.
Arrested? At least you got a pair of shiny new silver bracelets.Life is beautiful, no?
arrested: denied intellectual access due to the lack of a few sense with which to buy a clue. [see also: "D'oh!"]
now, in my head that seemed kind of logical -- but then my head is spinning following a delicious 3 hour cup of coffee with a certain Lampshade Lady and a certain Guy Up the Hudson with Gun & Camera (who's own arrested sensibilities can be the only explanation for the fact he didn't tell his wife what he was doing today. that Al)
Squaregirl: "Arrested Development" was one of the best shows ever! (we miss it, too)
Arrested: Took a nap under a magnolia tree.
lvnafn: Love in the afternoon
TLP: HAHAHAHAHAHA! (*that* was funny!)
Quilly, I'm not worried. By the way, the package is wiggling. Allahu Akbar!
Thank you, Square, and be sure I'll adorn the story until the price is right.
Actonbell, ain't life grand?
I get it, Puppybrose, mind=money=freedom. Or maybe I should call you "Che."
Bless your heart, Tan Lucy.
arrested: something which happens to the best of us at one time or another. At least I imagine that is what I will say when they finally catch up to me.
arrested: what almost happened to me for talking on my cell phone sans hans free. What a world.
Doug, didn't you hear about the shootout in Grand Central today?
No! What happened G?
I come to Doug's for all my news...Joel's report was how I found out first about the horrible mystery smell in NYC the other day!
Cooper, that's a lot better than "Get your nazi hand off my shoulder! It's a free country!" in my experience.
G, that was you?
Mutha, all smells lead to Waking Ambrose.
Sorry Mutha, this is like War of the Worlds, oh the humanity. It was a backjoke to some comment of Doug's as Al, Neva and I got together for coffee and tawk in Grand Central today.
Sorry for any confusion!
Caught criming without the money to satisfy the police.
Ah, how true!
One morning when I was working as a newspaper spotter (I dropped bundles of papers off for the carriers) I got pulled over. Turned out I had a tail light out but I didn't know this until later because I was told to get out of the car and was frisked and asked if I had any knives, guns or hand grenades on my person. (For once in my notorious life, I'm not kidding.) Turns out I was being arrested for a four year old speeding ticket that I'd forgotten about. They said they'd let me go if I could give them $50. I asked what kind of idiot carried that kind of cash around at five in the morning.
Guess I should have been that kind of idiot!
Post a Comment