Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Absentee

ABSENTEE, n. A person with an income who has had the forethought to remove himself from the sphere of exaction.

2007 Update: An individual whose expanding good-fortune, wealth, ease and notoriety greatly exceed their virtue and effort, even on the cusp of election to committee chair.

30 comments:

Anonymous said...

first?

Anonymous said...

sorry, that word ("first") has been absent from my vocabulary -- where this site is concerned -- for quite some time. and even when i have been first, i generally claim the spot on behalf of teh Penguin! but not today, bub. no siree. today i am absent of loyalty and/or honor. and/or sense. and/or any good thoughts on a definition.

and/or caffeine.

Anonymous said...

absentee: a person with little social sense and big crowded-room issue.

Ariel

Anonymous said...

and/or the ability to read anything thoroughly before racing to comment.

Absentee: the status of the gray matter that "normally" resides between my ears. sigh.

Anonymous said...

ABSENTEE, n. Nominee. One who elects to pay later.

Anonymous said...

absentee 1) politician who takes a stand on a controversial issue by refusing to show up and take a stand. 2) a student from my classroom, sometimes also know as Ike, who will be absent today becausde there is a math test.

Sar said...

Abs + Tea = Absentee

Quilly, I have math on the brain this morning. I'm in the college library at the moment, about to head off to class & take a math test of my own. Let's hope by then I have math in the brain!

Anonymous said...

Sar: or, Abs 'n tee ~ bared-midriff in a tight shirt? (good luck on that test!)

Anonymous said...

absentee: voting by leaving

(too many gerunds?)

TLP said...

Absentee: Sounds like a liqueur, only less cordial.

Anonymous said...

Absentee: 1. Like the Cheshire Cat, except leaving a vote behind. 2. A person with rights, just like anyone else. "If you prick us, do we not bleed?"

~ahem, Prick: ...

Mutha said...

Absentee: It's the thought that counts.

Anonymous said...

Absentee: "Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?" or much more effective in the morning: "Anyone? Anyone?"

The Boy from S.A.C.A.D.A. said...

I was absentie from skhool today.

Anonymous said...

Absentee: "here", but not here.

Anonymous said...

The person we can gossip about

G said...

That's right Lammy, you'd be best to be the last person leaving the room...or this world, as the case may be.

Absentee: "You don't call, you don't write"...a Jewish mother's best friend.

feytup: Yiddish for what the Jewish Mother becomes with the absentee.

Mo'a said...

Absentee no longer.

G. Nat Salpigga said...

a senator running for president.

Anonymous said...

uh...is it just me, or is the person responsible for this blog an absentee today?

G said...

Puppybrose, I couldn't quite put my finger on what was different, but that's it!

Doug The Una said...

Puppybrose, yes'm. It's okay to look out for number 1, especially when she's absent.

Ariel, I'm laughing because I've spent the last two days actually around the corner from big rooms filled with people I'm theoretically in.

Puppybrose, don't confuse absenteeism with retirement.

Amoeba, the nominee is ever in the room, its true.

Quill, neither of those are rare types.

Sar, have you found a hot pink pocket protector yet?

Puppybrose, I couldn't do math after that image. Sar has a better shot.

Mule, I am never getting enough gerunds.

TLP, I think you might have the crown royal for today.

Al, thanks for keeping order in my absence.

And what, Mutha, could be more thoughtful than absence?

Jenna, one of these days I need to see that movie. Ben Stein is my idol.

Boy, be careful. If you don't do well in school, you're liable to end up writing poetry for robots.

Puppybrose, that's why I'm logging in.

Lammy, did you hear what Icy did?

G, I think that piece of culture has spread.

Mo'a and good to see you always.

g. nat, that's almost all of them. Jim Webb probably has the place to himself most days.

Puppybrose, still in San Diego, but gracing you during a long speech.

G, you noticed!

Omnipotent Poobah said...

absentee - One who generally causes less problems than a presentee.

Minka said...

absentee: The male physical being responsible for half my genepool. Unfourtunately the better half, I am afraid :)

Jamie Dawn said...

I have no idea what Bierce's definition means.

Yours threw me for a loop too.

My brain is intact, but my comprehension is absent.

Absentee voters send in their ballots good and early, then regret it after finding out at the eleventh hour that their shiny candidate is tarnished.
Advice to leakers: leak early.

Alana said...

I've been wondering how long it was gonna be before you commented on my effort and virtue...

Doug The Una said...

Poobah, that couldn't be truer.

Minka, I guess that's why you have so many fans overseas. You got that from your donor.

Actonbell, that was a funny definition. You'd be proud of me. I wrote this morning's post a little hung over. Absinthe straight.

Jamie Dawn, I think Bierce's definition and mine for "absentee" were both mailed in.

Square, you just sat there while you were elected. What value is virtue if not to manipulate? What worth has effort if brings you to board meetings? As a friend, I have to ask.

TLP said...

Look here, buster! I coulda been first if you weren't an absentee blogger.

Elbot said...

How dare you cast aspersions on robotic poetry. Not only does it rhyme, the voltage makes it glow!

Doug The Una said...

Sorry, TLP. I was writing when I should have been publishing.

Elbot, no aspersions meant. I've been a great admirer of robot poetry ever since I learned that with solar panels you can make the meter run backwards.