Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Sorcery

SORCERY, n. The ancient prototype and forerunner of political influence. It was, however, deemed less respectable and sometimes was punished by torture and death. Augustine Nicholas relates that a poor peasant who had been accused of sorcery was put to the torture to compel a confession. After enduring a few gentle agonies the suffering simpleton admitted his guilt, but naively asked his tormentors if it were not possible to be a sorcerer without knowing it.

2006 Update: Breathing nature's wisdom into the still air of a human mind through the ear.

Speaking of necromancy, and we will, Karma has posted and you bet it's a funny one.

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

Eek!

Anonymous said...

Umm, Sorcery: A step below Cuppery.

Anonymous said...

Damn Al! I had to resign in with beta - big headache.

Charlene Amsden said...

sorcery the ability to get 30 ten year olds to all sit down and do the same thing at the same time without using force or violence

Anonymous said...

You have my sympathies, G. I got so excited when I saw Doug's post, I screwed up my word verification, like, four time trying to get my "eek" comment in.

As for Minky, all I can say is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4IKdmaMS1A

(And, this morning, I finally figured out that "teh" is "the" in Icelandic, right? Is Dyslexic a language, too?)

Charlene Amsden said...

hmmmm ...

sorcery the Dawg's ability to convince us Blogger wasn't working for him when in fact it was working fine for all those waiting for him ....

Anonymous said...

Knock, Knock

Who's There?

Sorcery.

Sorcery, who?

Sorcery you weren't able to get this friggin' post up sooner.

(d'oh)

Anonymous said...

sorcery - funny, I really was just going to type - fourth grade curriculum and so I shall.

Anonymous said...

Sorcery: something I don't do, but it seems that everyone thinks I do.
Doug, your definition is eloquently written, but confusing the hell out of me right now...

The amoeba said...

SORCERY, n. Technology without the help line. Or sometimes with it.

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. - Clarke's Third Law

Unknown said...

tricks that the dawg tried with the late posting. but you can't teach an old dog new tricks can ya?

Unknown said...

oh and Douglas, you can breathe into my ear all you want :P

lszjvf: lazy and joyous? vot the f***

Doug The Una said...

Al, all is spoonery.

G, some day someone will explain to me the magic of blogger beta.

Quilldancer, but why would you want to do that? Teaching by 2x4 is out of fashion, I guess.

That's right, Al. Poke the bear. So glad you showed up.

Quill, blogger was fine. My internet connection at home was down. I was in the office at 6 just for you guys and you give me grief? I don't know where all this curmudgeonliness comes from but it's very unattractive.

Punnybrose, as long as you keep bringing your A-game I'll keep finding a way to post.

G, that just came up on my ouija board.

Solace, on occasion when I'm really rushed things sometimes come out cryptic. I think you do sorcery.

O Ceallaigh, well done, Sir!

Karma, so you like the stock report.

My verifier is "ZEXWOD." I just thought I should point that out.

Anonymous said...

Doug, Apparently it's more in line with other blog providers, like typepad, blah blah blah. You know this all alludes me, you'll have to ask a master...er, expert beta.

Oh I just knew there was sorcery at work, yes I did.

Charlene Amsden said...

Doug, if we didn't give you grief you wouldn't know we cared.

Anonymous said...

Sorcery is always at work at Blogger. Wordpress has free hosting, and the all important categories

Unlike Blogger and Typepad, it's known to be reliable as no socerous influences pervade it

Anonymous said...

I thought a Beta Blogger was something you got at the drug store, by prescription only. [Sucks, I know.]

Actually, FYI, "Blogger Beta" refers to technical changes made by Blogger after their acquisition by Google. As far as I can tell, there are three major changes:

1. You sign in using your GMAIL username/password. Google's trying to drive this "single sign-on" throughout all their acquisitons, so you can expect YouTube to require this someday, too.

2. They support categories now, so you can organize your posts by keyword, as with Wordpress. This is a BIG deal, as Pia points out and demonstrates in her great blog.

3. They've cleaned up their templates a bit.

Happily, as ever, the content is still left up to the Blogger.

I learned all this while recently working on my blog, which is still crap and, therefore, offline. I also learned, more than once, that they've done nothing to improve overall reliability.

Look for that in Blogger Gamma. Ha! That'll be your version, G.

TLP said...

When are we gonna start talkin' about necromancy? I need to communicate with the spirits of the dead in order to predict the future of the stock market.

Mutha said...

"a few gentle agonies" eh?
sounds kinky.

Socery: That which the mainstream cooler heads can not explain.

Anonymous said...

Sorcery? Isn't that what keeps me coming back here over and over and over and over? Kinda like black magic...voodoo...necromancy and so on.

Granted I wouldn't want to be hexed or anything.

Unknown said...

thanks for the pointer. good dog

TLP, you can borrow my ouija board tomorrow because right now my spirits are occupied

boqti: boo, its qasper

robkroese said...

The mysterious art of having every Thanksgiving dinner dish ready at exactly the same time.

P.S. Punnybrose's knock-knock joke is a classic.

Anonymous said...

G: i once tried to start a softball team called The Master Betas. sadly, no one else thought it was funny (where-o-where were you when i needed you?) i actually *did* play for a team years ago called the Master Batters. but that's another cheesy story for another day.

Thanks Diesel. sometimes i get lucky (other times i worry my penchant for puns will get me permanantly banned from this site.)

Anonymous said...

Puppy, my college's Italian Club had an intramural soccer team that called themselves "The Fun Ghouls". I'd pay serious money for one of their shirts today.

Minka said...

According to Pratchett it is the eighth son of an eigth son, that becomes a sorcerer! The rest of the bunch just end up plain wizards with a fancy for odd looking head wear!

oh and also: "Do you believe in magic, magic...?"

(sorry about not being in tune but wispers in my ear are distracting me!)

Doug The Una said...

G, that was a great line. I see Al is the Master of Beta.

Quill, that'll be a hard hypothesis to test.

Pia, I agree. There are witches involved with Blogger.

Al, I don't think you appreciate how low our standards are around here.

TLP, I tried that already and got Ken Lay.

Mutha, so the BCS football rankings are witchcraft? Color me unsurprised.

Jenna, your words say no no but your avatar says yes yes.

Karma, Johnny Walker black label?

Diesel, that's quite a sorceress you've got there.

Puppybrose, if I ban you I'll have to ban me. You have nothing to fear. Oh, and why am I not surprised?

Al, that's pretty funny. I sure wouldn't want to use the same locker.

Minka, I was pretty sure who you'd be quoting when you got here. Here I thought it was the 7th son of the 7th son, but according to the Strong Anthropomorphic Principle, he must be right.

Anonymous said...

not to interrupt any whispering into any Penguin's ear, but well, okay... someone has to say this, and it may as well be me:

AL *finally* has a blog. and it's a very nice blog, at that. you can see it, HERE.

you may resume your whispering now. (i always thought it was the 7th son, too. but i make stuff up, so i can never be sure about what i know and what i think i know.)

Kyahgirl said...

you had me laughing with 'the still air of a human mind'.
you're a funny, cynical little dog Willie.

Minka said...

it usually is teh 7th of a 7th in the magical sphere of the world. practhett is just different, that is why I like him! And it also is his sorta humour, to stump you with something you thought you knew. Ahhh...Pratchett!

Anonymous said...

SORCERY: advertizing. (That may be the opposite of your good update)
Funny, I was just reading a bit about necromancy, and other balderdash.

Sar said...

When History of the World meets Harry Potter...

"Don't get Sorcery With Me Bernice!"

Anonymous said...

People Magazine - "My mom left my dad because he's too old for her and he's crazy."
source, Suri (Cruise)

Unknown said...

Douglas, ever since i came back from the dead, i developed a taste for Bloody Marys

csylbi: cocktails bring syphillis

Sophisticated Writer said...

ٍSorcery: The use of magic powers derived from evil spirits.

Note: Powers President Bush seems to have.

Doug The Una said...

Puppybrose, nicely done. Thanks for letting us know. Everybody to downtown New York!

Kyah, *Wags innocently*

Minka, I can see the connection.

Actonbell, as far as I can tell you're always reading about necromancy and similar balderdash.

Sar, way to step in for V.I.

Goldennib, welcome back and that was a well-done pun.

They sure do, Karma.

Sophisticated, I think the sorceror's stone is running just a little weak lately.

Anonymous said...

Sorcery: If I can't do it and you can than it's sorcery.

Doug The Una said...

Alice, you're no wicked witch.

Cooper said...

this is true

Cie Cheesemeister said...

Without sorcery I would have no hope.
I really wish I could conjure the spirit of Bierce to help me finish my story.

Doug The Una said...

Toldya.

Cheesemeister, try the post on June 24 of this year.