FREE-TRADE, n. The unrestricted interchange of commodities between nations-not, it must be observed, between states or provinces of the same nation. That is an entirely different thing, so we are assured by those who oppose free-trade, although wherein the difference consists is not altogether clear to anybody else. To all but those with the better lights it seems that what is the sauce for the goose is sauce for any part of the goose, and if a number of states are profited by exclusion of foreign prodcts, each would be benefited (and therefore all prosper) by exclusion of the products of others. To these benighted persons, too, it appears that if high duties on imports are beneficial, their absolute exclusion by law would be more beneficial; and that the former commercial isolation of Japan and China must have been productive of the happiest results to their logical inhabitants, with the courage of their opinions. What defect the protectionist sees in that system he has never had the goodness to explain- not even their great chief, the unspeakable scoundrel whose ingenious malevolence invented that peerless villainy, the custom house. See PROTECTION.
2007 Update: A policy protecting sovereignty for the milk-pail against the tyranny of cows.
A patriot rose from his good lunch,
And denounced to the crowd at the diner,
The foreign tortilla, the alien waiter
And the sauce made from a Peruvian minor.
The crowd rose up and roared with approval
Then returned to the bread and the feast
While the wheat might come from overseas
Our brothers are there in the yeast.