Thursday, June 24, 2010

Griffin

GRIFFIN, n. An animal having the body and legs of a beast and the head and wings of a bird. It is now thought to be extinct, though Arsene Marsil saw one as lately as 1783, in the Vosges. Its fossil remains in singular preservation are so frequently found in the ruins of ancient cities that many eminent scientists (including Drs. Harkness and Behr, of the California Academy of Sciences) suppose it to have been generally domesticated. Linnaeus, following Pliny, calls it the Quadrupavis amalgamata mirabilis, but the learned Professor of Natural History at the Berkeley University ingeniously points out that it belongs to the genus Aquileo. Like the mule (Asinequus ostinatus) the griffin owed nothing to the Creator: it was the result of an entangling alliance between the eagle and the lion.

2010 Update: An animal that looked like a lion in departure and a canary on approach. It is speculated to have been a forbear of the modern manager (Homo intoxicus.)

Update: An uninfernal birthday to Ambrose Bierce.

17 comments:

the amoeba said...

Recent sightings in Hollywood demonstrate the evolution of the beast, which now represents an amalgam between an actor and a human being. Computer-mediated backcrossing, however, is minimizing the percentage of the genome (and the morphology) contributed by the human partner. See LARA CROFT and (an early iteration) MAX HEADROOM.

Ariel the Thief said...

Griffin, the more perfect lion.

TLP said...

Griffin, Kathy: Can scare (and amuse) coming and going.

tsduff said...

I've never seen a canary with such a dangerous beak.

Ha ha Amoeba - I loved Max Headroom.

Thom said...

GRIFFIN, n. - Many of Apple's products would be lost without that company. I'm sure many others as well.

It seems to me that the animal would leave less poo, etc if it looked like a canary on departure and a lion on approach. But who knows...either way there's a mess to clean up.

~Karen said...

GRIFFIN, n. Clearly, Thom is one tenacious commenter as evidenced by his trail of good-will scattered across the blogosphere.

And he is still good looking as evidenced by his photos at STONY RIVER.

My particular favorite was of Susan extending her middle finger meant for Thom's Eyes Only.

~*~

TLP said...

It's Ambrose's birthdate? Why, so it is. I think it has to be infernal however. Or have you built him a stairway to heaven?

Logophile said...

I bet you are they are quite tasty, and plenty of meat too!

~Karen said...

Hello Logo (tm)

"I am in my thirties, I am female, I am happily married and have two kids. If you want to know more than that you better just ask"

o.k. So what's your beef with Quilly?

Omnipotent Poobah said...

A mythical beast having the body of a lion and the head of Merv Griffin.

cooper said...

Ariel the Thief is truly a thief because she took my definition.

~Karen said...

I like chicken
I like liver
Meow Mix
Meow Mix
please deliver!

Meow meow meow meow
meow meow meow meow
meow meow meow meow
meow meow meow

meowwwwww

.

Ariel the Thief said...

Yes, yes, just send Bierce to heaven, THAT would be the dance on his head. *grinning*

~Karen said...

~~~~~~~~~ and caught up with her out of sight from the site of the mix-up.

;-)

Doug said...

Amoeba, it sounds like our griffins have devolved into frailer but less flawed beast.

Ariel, I'm not sure feathering a lion improves it.

True, TLP, and she looks like a lion on departure from the plastic surgeon's office and probably a canary coming in.

Terry, I think you might be the sole human who loved Max Headroom. I didn't even like when G.B. Trudeau used him as a Reagan caricature.

Thom, from now on, you build the myth. That seems like an important design element.

Karen, that's a nice comment, although I'm inclined to think its Thom's good nature that's won him a lot of the adulation. Tenacity in blogging isn't always a plus.

TLP, I'm not in the stairway business, but I hope he got a light sentence for his birthday. Maybe the demons just yanked his nose or something.

Logo, barbecue griffin has an allure, doesn't it?

Karen, I think that quote refers to her site.

Poobah, as long as it doesn't have his hands, I'd say.

Cooper, preplagiarism?

Thanks, Karen. Is there any better way to spend time than remembering old catfood jingles? Got anything for Wagon Train?

No doubt, Ariel. Can you imagine him among the pious? It would be the dance on their heads.

Thom said...

Nope...I'm leaving that up to you!!! LOL I'll do the cleaning up ROFLMAO!! Thanks for the shout out. Snarky is as snarky does I always say LOL

~Karen said...

Thom ... Everyone loves good snark.